Hands down, one of the most asked questions I’ve received since I announced my pregnancy last March is whether we will raise our daughter a vegan. It’s something that Eric and I discussed long before getting pregnant, but we revisited the topic again when I did get pregnant. I’ve been clear in the past that our household is not a vegan household – Eric doesn’t follow a vegan diet, although a lot of his meals are vegan because he loves the food that I make (yup, tooting my own horn! hah). He now enjoys hundreds of foods he wouldn’t even touch when we first started dating and it’s been incredible to see his diet transform over the years from deep fried fast food to vibrant veggie-filled home-cooked meals. From eating a huge bowl of frosted flakes cereal to a huge green smoothie every morning, the change has been huge. So even though he’s become more conscious about selecting organic meat from local farms whenever possible and eschewing a large amount of dairy from his diet, he has no plans of going vegan. I support him completely; after all, he was never vegan before we met and he is happy and healthy which is what matters.
Many people have assumed that we would raise Adriana on a vegan diet, but we’ve actually decided not to label her diet in any shape or form. This is for a couple reasons. First, I want her to be able to try any food that she wants to, including the food her dad and family members eat in front of her. Second, I want her to decide for herself when she is older whether she will attach any sort of label to her diet. I have personally experienced benefits and drawbacks to labeling my own diet, and I don’t want to put my beliefs on her or assume that my diet is the best diet for her. That being said, we eat so many plant-based meals in this house I have no doubt that her diet will be filled with vegetables, fruit, legumes, beans, whole grains, nuts, seeds, and healthy fats! We are very grateful for the food we have access to and above all, I’d like to instill this sense of gratitude in her and also an excitement for healthy food, understanding its impact on our energy, etc. We are incredibly lucky that we even have the privilege of discussing this topic. But would we stop her from enjoying some of her dad’s chicken or a birthday cake at a friend’s party or a home-cooked meal at Mimi’s or Babcia’s house? No we won’t (assuming she doesn’t have an allergy down the road, of course).
I know that deciding what to feed one’s family is a very personal topic, but I want to be open about it as I have with my own dietary changes in the past. Obviously, there is no right or wrong answer to this question. Vegan households can work really well if that is the goal (and I know many friends who are currently rocking it!), but this is what we’ve decided is right for us.
I’d love to hear from you about this topic. Have you ever struggled with the decision as to whether to label your child’s diet? Do you live in a household with different diets or allergies? How do you find a balance?
PS – Adriana turned 6 months on Saturday! We celebrated by giving her her first solid food – avocado. I haven’t laughed so much in a long time. It was seriously awesome. I also re-read her birth story and cried a little. More on this feeding thing later.
xo
Comments are now closed – May 20/15
Vegan is NOT a diet, it’s a lifestyle that refrains from inflicting any harm or slavery upon animals. By having a child, you therefore are NOT acting in the best interest of the animals and therefore can no longer call yourself vegan. You’re just on a plant-based diet. That child could potentially cause the same kind of destruction(if not more) than the typical american, considering the push to have children is increase by the year. The weak-willed, or weak-minded choose to ignore the environmental and economical whiplash that child bring upon a society. Their narcissistic willingness to birth a child instead of saving one through adoption is also a thing of mystery. So many non-vegan children that could be saved and be taught the importance of veganism. This way you’re converting a vegan and reducing the non-vegan population by one(at least until they move out/make decisions on their own). There really is no excuse to give birth to a child, you can’t even give the “adoption is too expensive” story because the government refunds up to $11,000 dollars in Canada if you adopt to cover expenses, and this can be looked into further. But really, most of it is a huge bargain if you count in they’re usually 1-8 years old on average and you just saved that 1-8 years worth of diapers, baby food, clothes, bikes, christmas presents, other useless shit kids eat through like no tomorrow.
All in all, you who have already had children: need not reply. You’ve already made your mistake, and though your selfish arguments may hold merit in your egocentric mind they are not in the best interest of the planet, especially if you’re telling people to have children of their own.
Also, my opinion is just words laced in facts and statistics.. I don’t believe we have a chance against the growing numbers, and we will all die in the next 50 years from one thing or another which is directly related to overpopulation. (like climate change, economic disaster, food/water shortage, etc.) One thing is certain: Rich people are going to be the only ones alive. Just the way they love it.
You are a nutcase.
Good for you. Not breeding is one of the most important things one can do for the planet.
I’m often mystified as to why animal rights people understand the morality of not breeding companion animals and instead adopting an existing one that needs a home,yet if they want to raise a child, they don’t take the next step to adopt one that needs a home.
I find it disheartening to see all this judgement and negativity against a person who’s just trying to do her best for her baby. Don’t forget, Eric gets a say in parenting decisions, too, including what to feed Adriana. We all do the best we can for our own family. I agree that it’s important to teach children about compassion to animals, but shouldn’t that extend to fellow humans as well? If people were more kind and supportive to each other, the world would be a better place.
Thank you for all that you do, Angela!
Well put, Anna. I think most people who change their belief or philosophy on any subject do so because they’re gently inspired by others to explore and learn about a different way of thinking. While I do appreciate the passion and love for animals that lie behind many of these comments, this is not how you’re going to convert anyone to your cause. Angela is one of the best friends this movement could have because she makes vegan eating accessible and appealing – and, frankly, THAT’S how you’re going to sway most non-vegans.
Yes, I agree! Calling someone selfish, an animal killer/hater, etc. is very off putting and is not going to help sway people into veganism.
What a balanced and healthy approach…exactly what I would expect from you! :)
So brave to put this out there. Who knew it would garner such a response one way or the other. I rarely comment on blogs, but I just wanted to say that you are a good person. You deserve respect and you truly respect others and that is what I admire about you. (Not to mention the delicious recipes!) I am glad you are open about this, even though I am sure it is hard to hear some of the just mean things said. Take heart in your own intuition and decisions. I think as parents every choice we make gets questioned and torn apart by others, no matter what it is. Take care and snuggle that sweet baby after you read some of these comments and know that you are the perfect mother for her.
Jesus Christ. I wonder how vegans get the reputation of being insanely sanctimonious?
Please learn to distinguish an ally from an enemy. Angela has done more to bring animal-free eating to the masses than any thousand of you.
Mary, best comment ever. Yes and yes!
This is exactly what I was trying to say. YES.
Yes, I could not agree more! If I see another “my child has never ever eaten meat” comment or a “I wish I was raised vegan from day one” remark, I think I may hurl. I highly doubt the point of this post was to allow everyone to brag about their off-spring’s food habits or discuss their vegan elitism.
Parents are just trying to do what they believe is right for their family and every family is different. Why can’t we just appreciate that Angela is being open and honest about a question I have no doubt she is tired of being asked?
Also, I don’t recall her EVER mentioning that Eric was vegan. So I’m not sure why people are getting angry about the chicken thing.
/ end rant
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.
Great post! I do not have children yet, but I always think about this topic. I am vegan and since have learned about the horrible things dairy and meat can do for our bodies. So if I have children I wouldn’t want them to eat it because of the negative effects. I look at meat and dairy like I do slurpees or candy…like yes they will think its tasty and want it….but I wont want them to eat anything I know is bad for them. Such a tough decision! But thank you for sharing!!!!
I have been vegetarian (now vegan) for 27.5 years. Neither of my children have ever had meat (they are 13 years old and 21 years old) and both are now vegan. You wonder at people who think they know what is best for another. The other that I think I know what is best for is the animal. For me, this is a social justice issue involving right and wrong, not simply a parenting preference. People who disagree with this choice and say so likely are not trying to be “hateful”. They may feel compassion and understanding for Angela, but still believe that this choice is unjust for the animals. And it is unjust for the animals.
I couldn’t agree more
You can either choose to feed your child violence or non violence. If you believe that feeding your child a plant based diet is unhealthy then you are doing it wrong. We make choices for our children every day , choosing what they eat is no different. Until they are old enough to establish their own ethical and moral position then I will choose for them. Stay vegan for the animals , the environment and for your health
I was really interested to read this post as I have been wondering how you would deal with this challenge. I think you are such a fantastic role model for active healthy living, I love your recipes and adore the baby blog too! Thank you for letting us into your new life as a mother!
A few people on here, as well as yourself, have commented on the difficulty of attached labels, and I know many vegans who actively dislike the term vegan because of some of the negative stereotypical connotations that are attached with the term, so I can understand your position on not wanting to label Adriana as anything.
However while vegan/plant based diets are unarguably hugely beneficial for your health as well as the environment, being vegan is ultimately not about you, but about the animals. People here are focusing on your’s, and later Adriana’s, right of choice. But this argument neglects the fact that every single animal raised in animal production industries (of which their are billions in the US alone) have had their rights taken away. The right to go outside when they want to, the right to procreate, the right to eat when they want to.
Does the deprivation of these basic rights to billions of other sentient beings really come secondary to your right of choice?
Being vegan is about living life as compassionately and gently as possible and I don’t think anybody should be made to feel that raising their children under those principles deprives them of anything.
Children are after all the future and don’t we all want to work towards creating a more just and compassionate world?
Here is some food for thought for the “true vegans” out here. Is there a “Code to Veganism”? Is there such a thing as the “perfect vegan”? Are vegans supposed to reject all non-vegan family members if they don’t adhere to their principles?
I’m a bit worried that some of the comments found here and on Facebook are just going to scare away people who are trying to cut out animal products from their diets.
I know some of you wished that everyone on the planet were vegan yesterday! I can hear it in your passionate comments. But if you want to convince people to adopt an animal-free diet, you should consider a different approach. Pointing fingers, guilt tactics, being judgmental is probably not the best route. Some of you should redirect your passion in a more constructive way.
Like Mary pointed out above: “Please learn to distinguish an ally from an enemy. Angela has done more to bring animal-free eating to the masses than any thousands of you.”
Don’t you think Angela is doing more good than harm with her recipes even though her household isn’t exclusively vegan?
Everyday omnivores consult her web site and recipe book to find new recipes in a conscious effort to reduce or eliminate their consumption of animal products. Just think of how many pounds of flesh, eggs and milk ingredients were saved because of this!
I couldn’t agree more. Judgemental comments, calling someone selfish, hypocritical, an animal killer or hater are not going to convince anyone to adopt a vegan or plant-based life. In fact, some of the sanctimonious comments I’ve read here are enough to turn anyone off because you’re either 100% vegan (or plant-based) or you suck. (That’s the impression I’m getting anyways).
People seem to be forgetting Eric plays a role in parenting Adriana as well, so Angela didn’t make this decision all by herself. I don’t recall her ever saying he’s vegan. She never said she’s going to start cooking meat. She said fruits, veggies, whole grains, beans, legumes, nuts, seeds, and healthy fats will make up a large portion of Adriana’s diet. Isn’t that what’s important?
Oh yeah! Words as “selfish, hypocritical, an animal killler” are such a horrible thing to use when describing a hypocrite and selfish person OR an animal killer but as someone on FB pouted out that animal eaters are the cause of : “Suffering animals, starving people and a dying earth…eh. No biggie.” And FYI, yes, it is a black and white issue and it is not a choice… you will not applaud someone for beating their kids less or a rapist by raping only 1 women a week instead of 3. We shall really start describing things with a true names and stop pink-wrapping and excusing everything.
So Daniela what you are saying is vegetarians and plant-based people who have family members that are non-vegan or even omnivores transitioning to being vegans/vegetarians should give up all their efforts because according to you it is a black and white issue, that their efforts don’t count because they are not true vegans in your eyes?
Okay let’s say all these people give up the fight today, imagine all the animals you would be sending to their deaths, all the animals that would continue to get raped every day, all the animals that we get their baby stolen from them, all the animals that will continue to be commercially exploited?!
Don’t get me wrong I am vegan myself and I think it is extremely important that we defend animal rights and give them a voice.
However, if you look at documentaries such as Earthlings, Food Inc, et al., you don’t see the documenter name-calling their audience. I believe the information is more powerful than anything else to rally people to our cause.
And since we are making comparisons here, you wouldn’t fight bullying by being a bully yourself to defend your cause right?!
By the way I am not trying to minimize in any way what is being done to animals. It is a serious issue but you know you don’t fight fire with fire!
I totally agree Nadine, thank you! Bullying and name-calling are not okay.
Well, there you go. You’ve proved my point exactly
Exactly.
Welcome to the lovely judgmental world of being a parent. I have zero tolerance for it. Keep doing what you are doing and be confident in your choices.
My son will be 7 months old in a couple days :) I LOVE making all of his baby food! I was vegetarian for 14 years, vegan for 2, GF for 8 years. I craved meat during my pregnancy and decided to listen to what my body was telling me and cooked and ate chicken…it was delicious! I didn’t crave it again during my pregnancy, so I didn’t eat it. After months of research, my hubby and I both decided that pastured meat and dairy will be included in our baby’s diet. There is NO WAY I’m going to prepare and serve meat to my baby without tasting it first, so I’m eating birds and cows again. I feel incredible! I’m so happy that I’ve added meat back into my diet. I love and respect animals even more now that they are providing my family with nourishment. And I’m much less bloated than I’ve been in years! I think all the beans and carbs I’ve been eating were irritating my gut. Do what you feel is best :)
Angela, many of these comments are so disheartening. Since when did “vegans” become such a group of judgmental haters? It makes me so sad that people carry around this much ill will and hate in their hearts. Please keep being true to yourself – that is the only guidance your daughter will ever need. For every person that is supposedly going to return your cookbook (which is ridiculous, it is just recipes people), there will be 10 more who buy it because of your open, honest, kind heart. Thank you for all that you do.
Hi Angela,
Sending lots of love and support your way! I’ve been a long time reader of your blog and have always appreciated how open you are about many difficult topics (and I love your recipes!). I’ve especially cherished your blogs about Adriana. As anyone who has spent any time reading your posts knows, you are an incredibly kind and intelligent person who puts a lot of thought towards everything you do. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to read some of these comments. I echo Jen above in saying “take heart in your own intuition and decisions.” You’re an amazing mother and Adriana is so lucky to have you two as parents.
Thank you for all you do to brighten so many lives.
Great comment Heather. I am also a long time reader of the blog. I am glad Angela was open and honest and I respect her family’s decision on how to raise her daughter. I’m all for discussion and hearing others perspective, but some of these comments are just nasty!!
As an English teacher, I’m finding the debate that this post prompted about the “true” meaning of “vegan” fascinating. If you look it up in the dictionary, the strict denotative meaning is “Not eating animal products.” That would mean Angela is accurate in describing her diet as vegan, and not that she is crassly co-opting the term to generate site traffic. Just the other day, I was reading reviews of Chloe’s Kitchen on amazon (which I find is another wonderful vegan cookbook) and there were several angry reviews that accused it of not REALLY being vegan because it used things like REFINED SUGAR! And deep frying!! A REAL vegan, the reviewers insisted, cared about his or her health and would NEVER eat the foods Chloe used (never mind that there wasn’t an animal product among them). So those vegans are angrily insisting that it is about health and anything unhealthy doesn’t count as vegan, whereas several people on this thread are angrily insisting that it is about INTENT, and not action. It doesn’t matter if you don’t eat animals, unless you are doing it for the animals. Interesting.
The Vegan Society’s definition:
“Veganism is a way of living which seeks to exclude, as far as is possible and practicable, all forms of exploitation of, and cruelty to, animals for food, clothing or any other purpose.”
Who says you get to define Vegan…In the general public’s opinion Vegan = no animal products in the diet. Words and their definitions are so we can understand one another. Unfortunately, you can’t make others think the same way you do just by declaring it so. You can choose your lifestyle and beliefs but you can’t make everyone else not use words they way they choose. Frankly, I don’t care why Angela used vegan in reference to her blog I’m just glad she did. It was helpful for me to find recipes that didn’t include dairy and eggs (and are delicious) so I can make food the whole family can eat (food allergies). This is a food blog, not a lifestyle/moral choice bog. Berating others for not looking at the world the same way as you is not helpful, compassionate or productive. Thank you Angela for the wonderful vegan recipes.
My daughter, who is now 15, was raised as a vegetarian, which I have been since I was 12. I decided before she was born that when she was old enough to realize what she was eating (animals/not animals, so probably at about age 5 or 6), she could choose what she wanted to eat in terms of being a vegetarian or not. But I didn’t want her to regret eating meat (as I did when I switched as a teen), so she’d be a vegetarian till then.
We conform mostly to a vegan diet now, but sometimes she’ll eat milk products (for example, when you’re a teenager, at school and social functions, sometimes pizza is the only choice). Emma has never wanted to eat meat and is happy she never tried it when growing up. She did her own research on factory farming, health benefits, etc., when she was a teenager. I never preached to her, only explained that meat was made from animals so I chose not to eat it. For some reason, it has been a lot easier on both of us than I’d imagined, even surrounded by mostly omnivorous friends/family. Besides all the other benefits of a vegetarian diet, she’s ended up being someone who will try pretty much any (non-meat) food: seaweed, kale, tempeh, anything ethnic, without batting an eye, while many of her friends won’t.
One thing that I always tried to do, was that when there was a school or other function where the food was animal-based, like fried chicken, I’d pack her something that was as least as good, if not better, than the meat option so she would feel that being a vegetarian also meant you had interesting food choices. For example, when she was in Grade 5 and her class was doing a medieval unit and had lunch, dressed in period clothes, eating Mary Brown’s fried chicken without cutlery, I made up a wicker basket with a veggie pasty, fruit, etc., for her to take.
Some decisions you have to make for your child. Would you let them drink beer? Chew on rocks? Animal products are not food, are not healthy and are a result of violence. I think it’s a very important thing to teach a child.
All these “Level Five Vegans” are freaking me out. So hateful. Reminds me of the super religious lunatics standing on street corners screaming about how women who wear shorts are going to hell or some other ridiculousness. This is Westboro Baptist Church-type behavior! Chill out, people! Angela has done more for your cause though her approach than than 1000 zealots combined.
Also, darn it, this is someone I care about! How odd, but truthfully, I feel as protective of Angela as if she were a friend in real life. She is so open and sweet and funny and I don’t want that to change because of a bunch of cyber-bullies. On top of all that, she is a NEW MOTHER! It is a supremely vulnerable time, especially for someone as sensitive as Angela. Why don’t you all go find a puppy to kick or something?
“First, I want her to be able to try any food that she wants to, including the food her dad and family members eat in front of her.”
So you consider the dead bodies of animals (who didnt want to die) “food?” This is troubling, especially since I thought that you were vegan? :/ Also, have you not considered the implications that eating animals and being taught to desensitize will have on your child? Children have a natural affinity for being around animals and wanting good for those animals, not death for them :(
Just wondering if you have read The World Peace Diet?…which really addresses all of the other harmful psychological/spiritual/emotional ways that eating meat and being taught that killing animals and eating their bodies harms us.