On October 31, 2008, I was just a girl grasping for hope.
I was struggling with disordered eating that still lingered despite my best efforts to beat it. I felt like I had made a lot of progress, but there was still a missing piece to my puzzle.
Self-love.
I fought a daily battle of self-acceptance, depressive thoughts, and anxiety. Despite the smile on the outside, most days I felt like I was crumbling on the inside. I was simply going through the motions of life and the days were passing me by. Indeed, I was truly thankful for so many wonderful people in my life, but the one thing I couldn’t be thankful for was myself.
I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to get to that place of self-acceptance or happiness, but I decided the first step was going to be writing about it.
And so it all began with a simple Boo on Halloween day!
I have always loved writing because it comes to me easier than expressing my thoughts out loud. It is just me and a keyboard or piece of paper talking to someone out there and thinking things through. Writing is a way for my inner voice to be heard when often it is silenced by all the thoughts swirling through my mind. Writing gives each thought a chance, each thought a moment to be heard and I often clear my mind or work things out as I write.
I guess this is why I was never meant to be a researcher. While I did spend most of my time writing in grad school, my writing was very very formal, scientific, and sterile in many ways. I felt suffocated when I wrote a research paper and I always felt like I couldn’t express my true self. In a paper, there was little room for jokes, sarcasm, stories, or occasional curse words (trust me, I could have used them many times!). It was all too structured.
I wanted to set my thoughts free.
Starting this blog was a way for me to have a creative outlet at a time when my creativity felt stifled in many areas of my life. OSG was the one place where I felt like I could express myself fully. I would simply write about what I wanted to write about, just like in my Creative Writing class in high school that I loved so much. My teacher had us make Creative Writing journals in high school and we could write whatever we wanted to in them. Personal stories, clippings, drawings, poems, deep thoughts, jokes, and anything that we wanted to share. I absolutely loved this journal and I would talk about my struggles with disordered eating, my love for delicious healthy food, animals, exercise, running, the desire for happiness, and whatever else I wanted to talk about.
Over the past two years, I have found that missing piece of self-love. Even on the days when I can’t find it and I am having a bad day, I know that it isn’t far away and it will come back to me. I have met amazing people along the way and I have been touched by the support and kindness of others.
Today, I write because I am truly thankful for these past two years, for sharing my life with you, the ups and the downs, and the discussions, inspiring words, and support. My hope for the blog going forward is to give back as much gratitude, love, and inspiration as I get from writing each day.
Thank you for letting me come into your lives each day and also, for allowing me to come into yours.
As a small token of my appreciation, I am going to do some giveaways!
1) Draw for $25 Glo Bakery gift certificates to be given out to 5 random people
2) Draw for a homemade batch of cookies, Glo bars, or muffins (any from my recipes page!) shipped to your doorstep.
3) Grand prize draw for $100 Glo Bakery gift certificate to one random winner
If you’d like a chance to be entered in the giveaway, please leave a comment below telling me anything about your own passions, journey, or perhaps something you have grown to love about yourself. Contest closes Monday Nov 8th.
I’m off to the kitchen to shoot my video for Challenge #7! Hopefully there aren’t as many flops as last night. ;) Happy Halloween!
One of my passions is to be able to stop working for “the man” and work for myself — and be able to be a strong presence for my family when the time comes to have kids. I basically don’t want to be a slave to my job (and the income it brings :) for the rest of my life — so we’ll see!
Happy Birthday Blog!
In the past year I have learned that I am able to do things I never thought possible- and have worked to bring back things that are important to my life. I realize I do not need a man or someone else telling me I can do something but it is nice to have a partner and friends supporting me along the way. There is a difference though, and I realize that the will, the courage and the work is really all coming from me and it is pretty amazing.
Happy blog-iversary! I’ve learned to love myself for who I am, and not what I think others want me to be.
A good friend of mine actually just asked me this question the other day and I was happy to realize my answer is truly running. Running has slllllooooowly become my passion – I love everything about it: how it makes me feel before, during and after, the gear, the planning and the feeling of acomplishment it brings!
Congratulations on 2 years for your blog! I have been reading for almost that long and you are in inspiration! For me, seeing others move from a job that they don’t like to doing something they love gives me hope that someday I will be able to as well! Best of luck for many more years of following your dreams!
Congratulations to you on finding your true passion! My passion has always been to help others…right now with 2 kids under the age of 5, I’m definitely doing that ;) I absolutely love your blog…all of your recipes inspire me to try to new things! Thank you!
I am thankful everyday for my life and truly love the path of staying home full time to be with my daughter. I am thankful for an inspiring blog such as your’s. From great food to inspiration and reflective words, I always have my coffee with Oh She Glows!
Currently, I’m pursuing my master’s degree in higher education. It’s hard to say that I only *think* this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, but I’m learning to live with the uncertainty that comes with life. So what if things change? The most important thing is that I give my all to what I’m doing now.
Happy 2nd Birthday OSG!
Everyday I read your blog to be a little more inspired in my own journey towards finding self love. It has been a long road but your blog and others like you help to see everyone is unique and yet we all have something in common that we understand one another and work towards finding ourselves and living in the moment.
Thank you for giving yourself every day through this blog and letting us take a little of it into our own lives.
Alex
Happy Anniversary!
Thank you for sharing your journey with your readers. It’s nice to know that we are not alone.
I continue to struggle with a distorted body image and negative self talk, but I have tremendously improved over the years thanks to yoga, healthy eating and a great online health and wellness community. The journey is ongoing.
Like you, I also struggled with disordered eating and it wasn’t until this year that I’ve changed the way I eat and the way I think about food, I’ve also become a vegetarian and am starting to take up running. I finally feel better about being me :) I love your blog, you are so inspiring!
Angela, your blog is such a gift, and it is so nice to hear how much it has given you. That is the most important thing! But thank you, I am continually striving to live a better life, be a better person, and take excellent care of myself. And your blog has certainly helped!
As for self-acceptance, I have learned to love that I am a very accepting person, actually. I grieve, get sad, and have tough times, but I am able to accept the bad things that happen and it allows me to better appreciate and love the good things. And I can accept people for what they are (well, it’s tough to accept the people who make political attack ads. YUCK!) and their shortcomings. This requires balance, so as not to be a doormat; I am willing to hold people accountable if needed. But most things require acceptance before they can be addressed or worked on, I think.
I am not perfect at it; as you know, self- or any other kind of acceptance is an art like yoga and takes practice, and some days are better than others! But it is not only something I now love about myself, it’s something I am proud of!
Thanks again for all you do.
After earning my undergraduate and continuing on to get my masters I took a different path earning my yoga certification and became a full time yoga instructor. I loved it with a passion. Although I still love yoga & continue my own practice, I now have another job I love all the more…extremely challenging and yet the most rewarding I have ever done. I am a full time stay at home mother to a gorgeous 15 month old. i wouldn’t change my life for the world. I continue my love for health, nutrition, and fitness, but do so at home. I hope and pray to be pass along my knowledge to my sweet daughter helping her to grow and develop to her fullest potential.
Hey Angela,
I found your blog about a month ago randomly when searching for a workout video. I was bored so I started reading and began to fall in love with this blog. I was on your site for hours reading post after post. It is now a site I visit almost daily. A month ago, I felt trapped in a vicious cycle I wanted to escape. I graduated college in May and started working in Kansas City. I was in a new city and didnt know anyone, nor was I meeting people. My last semester of school was so stressful, I had gained a lot of weight because of bad eating and sleeping habits and not taking time to work out. So after moving to Kansas CIty, I would go to work and pretty much go home and sit on the couch. I’d work out every once in awhile, but had no real routine for myself. I was for lack of better words, somewhat depressed. I wasn’t really unhappy as much as in a rut that I had no desire to get out of.
Your blog has been an inspiration to me. It has reminded me to love myself for who I am and to enjoy life no matter what- to live in the moment. It has also encouraged me that I can do things I set my mind to. I can run a half marathon with my friends in January, I can eat healthy, I can love my body, I can be completely me and love myself. So I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for sharing your story that so many people young and old alike can relate to. Thank you for inspiring people to be all that they can be. And thank you for being completely yourself! :)
Happy anniversary! If there is any thing that reading blogs has taught me, it is the courage to follow your passions, and never look back.
I just recently started reading your blog, and I think what you’re doing is GREAT!! congrats on TWO years of blogging (and finding yourself and working your way towards a balanced and complete you).
Happy 2nd birthday!
I think that all too often my image is just the “mom” and “commander of house”. This summer I made an effort to share some of my passions with my kids. We bought a riding pony, which has brought me as much joy as them. I also started handing over my camera and really enjoy looking at the world through their lens.
So, thank you for reminding me of my passions.
I’ve grown to love writing my own blog – it gives me a chance to be creative and stay connected with people. I also get to try fun new recipes and share them with others :)
I have a passion for helping others and making people smile. I love baking and I feel confident and worth something while I’m in the kitchen. I don’t have to serve to anyone else but me. I love moments to myself and writing in my journals. My journey to self love is stilll in the works, I’m hoping to get there soon.
Angela, thank you for your continued inspiration. Your blog is something I look forward to reading whenever I have a chance. I share your passion for writing, as well as fitness and nutrition, and am working hard to try and find new opportunities to excercise those passions in my day-to-day life. I’m still struggling with body-image and losing weight, but your writing is helping me as I move toward a healthier, happier lifestyle. One thing I do love about myself and find empowering is my caring heart. Caring for my family and friends is my number one priority, and now I’m trying to find a way to balance that and my priority for wellness.