On October 31, 2008, I was just a girl grasping for hope.
I was struggling with disordered eating that still lingered despite my best efforts to beat it. I felt like I had made a lot of progress, but there was still a missing piece to my puzzle.
Self-love.
I fought a daily battle of self-acceptance, depressive thoughts, and anxiety. Despite the smile on the outside, most days I felt like I was crumbling on the inside. I was simply going through the motions of life and the days were passing me by. Indeed, I was truly thankful for so many wonderful people in my life, but the one thing I couldn’t be thankful for was myself.
I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to get to that place of self-acceptance or happiness, but I decided the first step was going to be writing about it.
And so it all began with a simple Boo on Halloween day!
I have always loved writing because it comes to me easier than expressing my thoughts out loud. It is just me and a keyboard or piece of paper talking to someone out there and thinking things through. Writing is a way for my inner voice to be heard when often it is silenced by all the thoughts swirling through my mind. Writing gives each thought a chance, each thought a moment to be heard and I often clear my mind or work things out as I write.
I guess this is why I was never meant to be a researcher. While I did spend most of my time writing in grad school, my writing was very very formal, scientific, and sterile in many ways. I felt suffocated when I wrote a research paper and I always felt like I couldn’t express my true self. In a paper, there was little room for jokes, sarcasm, stories, or occasional curse words (trust me, I could have used them many times!). It was all too structured.
I wanted to set my thoughts free.
Starting this blog was a way for me to have a creative outlet at a time when my creativity felt stifled in many areas of my life. OSG was the one place where I felt like I could express myself fully. I would simply write about what I wanted to write about, just like in my Creative Writing class in high school that I loved so much. My teacher had us make Creative Writing journals in high school and we could write whatever we wanted to in them. Personal stories, clippings, drawings, poems, deep thoughts, jokes, and anything that we wanted to share. I absolutely loved this journal and I would talk about my struggles with disordered eating, my love for delicious healthy food, animals, exercise, running, the desire for happiness, and whatever else I wanted to talk about.
Over the past two years, I have found that missing piece of self-love. Even on the days when I can’t find it and I am having a bad day, I know that it isn’t far away and it will come back to me. I have met amazing people along the way and I have been touched by the support and kindness of others.
Today, I write because I am truly thankful for these past two years, for sharing my life with you, the ups and the downs, and the discussions, inspiring words, and support. My hope for the blog going forward is to give back as much gratitude, love, and inspiration as I get from writing each day.
Thank you for letting me come into your lives each day and also, for allowing me to come into yours.
As a small token of my appreciation, I am going to do some giveaways!
1) Draw for $25 Glo Bakery gift certificates to be given out to 5 random people
2) Draw for a homemade batch of cookies, Glo bars, or muffins (any from my recipes page!) shipped to your doorstep.
3) Grand prize draw for $100 Glo Bakery gift certificate to one random winner
If you’d like a chance to be entered in the giveaway, please leave a comment below telling me anything about your own passions, journey, or perhaps something you have grown to love about yourself. Contest closes Monday Nov 8th.
I’m off to the kitchen to shoot my video for Challenge #7! Hopefully there aren’t as many flops as last night. ;) Happy Halloween!
Congrats on 2 years! I love your site and find your journey to be truly inspiring. I am still trying to figure out what I want to “do” with my life, but people like you make the possibilities seem endless. Thanks!
I am a working mother from Florida. I adore my family and my little 2 year old Isabella is the greatest inspiration for me to live a healthy lifestyle. This year I have been dedicated to changing my unhealthy habits into positive choices because I want her to have a great example of how fun a healthy lifestyle can be! I am also passionate about my job as a health care provider. I want to practice what I preach and be able to show my patients (not just tell them) how to reach their goals. I want them to see that they too are valuable and worthy of a longer life. Thank you for putting your voice out there to inspire and encourage us. Best wishes!!
Congrats on two years!
I’ve learned that everyday is a battle to fight negativity in the world and my own thoughts in order to accept and love myself. I’m realizing as I’m growing up that caring and loving yourself is the most important tool in being happy.
Congratulations on OSG’s 2 year anniversary!
How can I even begin to appreciate this blog? Within a month of reading this blog, a world of healthy cooking and living opened to me. Your beautiful photography photos enticed me to try cooking on my own. I am so amazed at how you are always developing and concocting new recipes! Now I cook from scratch everyday and have so much fun! I’ll be dancing and singing in the kitchen.
Reading your blog has also strengthened my recent decision to be vegan. I see the glow developing outwardly and most importantly – inwardly. I want to just play everyday and love me, my body, and everything I’ve been blessed with.
The Kundalini yoga DVDs with Ana Brett & Ravi Singh have been the change my life needed. I started a daily practice in January 2010 and my life has DRAMATICALLY transformed. I am not the same person I was eight months ago and the journey is still getting sweeter! I am more flexible, strong, and balanced as a result. A little bubble of joy is always within me no matter what life may be.
Thanks for helping me on my journey! Life is beautiful.
Congratulations! You are such an inspiration. I’m just starting to learn to love myself and the world around me. I’ve been walking through life with my eyes closed for a couple of decades and it’s nice to know I’m on a path well travelled. The blog world has really helped open my mind to what is really important.
I have learned to love the journey. I don’t always love the way I look, or the way I feel, or how much effort I have to put into losing weight when my friends don’t, but I am learning to love life and myself and the journey that it is taking me on.
Two years down and hopefully many more to come!!! I just love your blog!
I have struggled with a disordered view of food for years but blogs like yours have really helped me find the “self love” that I have been lacking for so long. Finally, after having two children(who I want to be a role model for) I have started to see food as a positive thing.. ..not a friend and not an enemy but something to be enjoyed. While I still overeat at times I do not make myself feel guilt over it and I don’t let any negative feelings linger about it. Maybe because I am eating much healthier foods!!! While my husband may not always be thrilled by the new recipes I am trying out I really enjoy them. IT is nice to taste your food and not the preservatives that keep them fresh!!
Happy Anniversary. I’ve only been reading your blog for 6 months now. I love it and look forward to it everyday. I love that your Canadian, me too. I’m a triathlete, although most days I feel like a “try-athlete”, lol. When I go to races I feel like an outsider as I look at all the fit people around me. I am trying to realize, I’m one of them. I just did my first half marathon 3 weeks ago. I love exercise and am blessed to have a fiance that is also a triathlete. It helps on the mornings I want to stay in bed which can be often in the winter when the tri season seems far away. Sometimes though I use exercise as an excuse to eat poorly, ie. I worked out so now I can eat chips/cookies/fries. My struggles with food and body image have been well, life long, at least since my teens. Giving my body proper fuel doesn’t always happen, I struggle with giving up what tastes good as opposed to what is good for my body even though the two are not exclusive. I’ve tried some of your recipes and loved them, especially the quinoa coconut curry. I’m a sucker for anything with quinoa. I am heading towards my wedding day in about 7 months and want to be healthy and glowing for it and for the rest of my life. Working on it. And if one more person asks me about losing weight for the wedding, well, my head might explode. You inspire me, period. Your honesty about your life, struggles and daily journey help me, make me smile and sometimes even get my butt out the door for a run.
I am so grateful and happy about my career. I’m an attorney and I’ve only been practicing for a few years. However, in the past year, I’ve gotten a lot more responsibility and, in turn, I have tackled all the challenges. I love what I do!
I am very grateful that I have a job that allows me to work part-time so I can also take care of my daughter. I am grateful that my husband works very hard as well, so we can afford for me to stay home more. It means the world to me that I can watch my daughter grow up.
Mrs. Angela,
Thank you so much for writing your blog, I enjoy reading it because it causes me to look inside myself and think. I am currently a senior in highschool and I believe at one of the hardest points of my life. I am constantly being judged by myself and others and have had a hard time with self-esteem, I am a swimmer and sadly will never be skinny. Since I have begun reading your blog I am encouraged to know that there are others out there who are going and have gone through these hard times. Each day I try to encourage myself to eat the best food I can, instead of strictly limiting myself with calorie counting. Just this last spring my family has decided to try and eat as much organic and healthy food as we can. It has been a slow process transitioning to paying more for less food, not getting Sonic, and trying to eat the best food for our bodies. Thank you for everyday continuing to give me hope that some day I will have the strength to truly and fully love myself.
Regan
Your blog is beautiful and inspiring:).
My passions: balance, health, athleticism, good (vegan) food. I recently started a job that embodies all of this. I couldn’t be happier. Of course, family and animal friends don’t even need to be mentioned, as they are my rocks.
My struggle: my aunt Laurie just started chemotherapy this week. She was recently diagnosed with breast cancer, and lives in Texas (I am in Pennsylvania). It kills me to not be with her, but she is a strong woman who is capable of countless things. I would do anything to make her well.
Thank-you so much for sharing your story- that takes a lot:). I’m happy that you have found solace in blogging and food! You’re amazing at both:).
Congratulations on your 2nd birthday!
I stumbled across your blog this past spring and it’s one of my favourites. I try to keep up on far too many but yours is one of the first ones I read everyday. It makes me want to be a better person. Thank you!
Hi! I love your blog!!
You seem so at peace with your life and I really respect that. I struggle with being at peace with my life, especially day to day. I am passionate about school and learning. I am a graduate student and really want to make a difference in people’s health through public policy.
Lovely giveaway and lovely blog.
Emily
Congratulations on 2 years!! I love reading your blog and trying your recipes, I really enjoy creating in the kitchen and I love trying new ideas.
My passion is my health and my job, teaching. I feel extremely lucky to be able to share my passion with (mostly) very motivated and intelligent students, and it’s fun to be creative while doing so. Lately I have also been more accepting of my body and myself in general, I think this has come from getting much more serious about my running in the last year and a half or so. It is amazing how you feel during a long run and the pride you feel after, basically I just feel much more balanced in my life since my renewed commitment to running.
Happy birthday!
Something I have learned . . . it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks of you! If I’m happy with the way I live my life, that’s all that matters : )
Congratulations on OSG’s 2nd anniversary! What an amazing journey!
I’ve been vegetarian for exactly one year today and have found your websites tremendous life saver and my go-to site for wonderful yummy recipes, entertaining stories and though provoking questions. I have felt a void inmy life over the past few months and have decided that I want to volunteer. I have joined the USO and recently I have been looking into several different animal sanctuaries in my area. Your stories have inspired me to fulfill my own life by helping others.
I have also started running not just for fun but to start doing something active that’s good good for me. Thank you for writing about running and your motivation.
Like you were two years ago, I am still perfecting my self-love…but I am learning that food is a way to fuel my body and I am learning to love the way I look in the mirror, the way I feel after a workout, and how my legs look. I want to thank you for sharing your journey and allowing your readers to feel comfortable.
Congratulations!! Thank you Angela for all your time that you put into your blog. Your lovve for healthy foods and a healthy lifestyle are inspiring! I love to read about what you are cooking….in and out of the kitchen! I have to say the love and respect you have for your husband and he for you really shines through.
I share so many of the passions you have…food, fitness and travel! My first love is the Lord. My passion for strengthening my faith is never ending. It has brought me through so much in my life….including being a young widow with 2 children. I now have 6 children and a wonderful husband * PTL*. I have begun to dip my toe back into the business world. Yet I am most passionate about my recent role as a Mentor Mom. This has enabled me to come along side young moms discussing parenting, marriage, faith and self esteem.
Thank you for being such a great example to so many young woman! Blessings to you and Eric.
Hi Angela,
I have been reading for a while but not commenting much…
I love your blog! you bring get recipes and sharing your journey and passions has inspired me very much.
I have analyzed myself much mroe since reading yoru blog and have been figuring out if I am doing things because I want to or because they are what are expected. I am slowly moving towards really doing what I love. I am re-discovering my passions and looking for ways to be involved with them every day!
Keep up the amazing work! Ansd thanks for having started this blog!