
Eric says I make my best recipes when I’m pmsing.
Wait, is that a back-handed compliment?
Errr…
And how did he know I was pmsing?
“Well,…remember the other night when you started to cry watching that wedding dress show…?”
“When the Dad cries, everyone cries.”
“…and the other day, I caught you with chocolate all over your face talking about some chocolate river…”
“….and how is that different from any other day?”
“Good point. Or yesterday, when you were yelling on the phone with the phone company…”
“She was a phone robot, that doesn’t count! Robots have no feelings, pulse,…or comprehension of the English language, evidently.”
“Or this morning when…”
Ooooooook, no need to live in the past. I’m sure we all get the point. ;)
After some careful thought, his statement did make sense.
PMS –> increase in calorie expenditure (yay, eat more) –> increase in hunger –> empty stomach feeling 24/7 –> chocolate river dreams –> cooking/baking success.
Now, let’s look for concrete proof of his claims over the past week:
- Chocolate Cake Batter Smoothie
- Stuffed Phyllo Rolls
- Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Glazed Doughnuts
- Cinnamon Sugar Pumpkin Spiced Doughnuts
- 5 Ingredient Cheeze Sauce
Guilty as charged.

If that is hard evidence, these Chocolate Chunk Toffee Bars are the final nail in my coffin. Eric declared the recipe ‘in the vault’ and mumbled something about chocolate while his eyes glazed over. Typical. The stash quickly disappeared in the span of 3 days. Not surprisingly, more by him than me!
I guess he’s suffering from Male Menstrual Syndrome. I better keep my distance…there’s nothing worse than MAN-MS, right ladies?

And don’t worry, I pointed and laughed at the chocolate smudges on the side of his mouth.

Chocolate Chunk Toffee Bars

Yield
9 large bars
Prep time
Rest time
45 minutes
Cook time
Total time
Everything I love in a granola bar- a crisp, toffee-like exterior with a chunky and chewy middle. Be sure to allow the bars to cool completely before slicing. If you adapt the recipe, please leave a comment with the changes you made and how it turned out! I’m curious if other flours and nut butters might work.
Ingredients
- 1.5 cup oats
- 1/4 cup whole grain spelt flour
- 2 tbsp chia seeds
- 1 tsp ground cinnamon
- 1/2 tsp kosher salt
- 1 cup walnuts, chopped
- 1/2 cup brown rice syrup
- 2 tbsp Earth Balance (or other non-dairy spread)
- 1/4 cup packed brown sugar
- 1/4 cup all natural peanut butter (my PB is very ‘drippy’- if yours is dry add another tbsp Earth Balance)
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 1/2 cup chocolate chunks or chips
Directions
- Preheat oven to 350°F and line an 8-inch pan with 2 pieces of parchment paper (one going each way), so the bars do not stick to pan.
- In a large bowl, stir together the dry ingredients (oats, flour, chia seeds, cinnamon, salt, walnuts).
- In a microwavable bowl, stir together the brown rice syrup, Earth Balance, brown sugar, and peanut butter. Microwave on high for 45 seconds. Alternatively you can heat this on the stovetop.
- Pour wet mixture onto dry and stir well. The mixture will be very tough to stir (it’s a thick dough!) so don’t be alarmed. Allow the dough to cool a bit before mixing in the chocolate (otherwise, if you add in the chocolate too soon, it will melt, and it’s best chunky).
- Scoop into prepared pan and with a wet spoon spread out the mixture. The dough will be very thick and sticky. I dipped a pastry roller into water and rolled it out. Try to get it as even as possible!
- Bake for 30-32 minutes at 350°F. Allow to cool in the pan, on a cooling rack, for at least 15 minutes. Remove carefully from pan and allow to cool on the rack for another 20-30 minutes. If you cut the bars before completely cooling, they will crack, so it’s a good idea to wait as they will firm up.

These granola bars took me a few tries, but I finally got the outcome I was looking for- a crispy, toffee-like exterior with a chewy, chocolaty middle. They have a slight toffee flavour and are like a less sweet, more natural candy bar!

The bars will firm up a bit once cooled which is exactly how I prefer to eat them. Their flavour and chewy texture gets better with age. :)

Ok, I just Googled ‘male PMS’ for fun and there’s an actual term for it called Irritable Male Syndrome (IMS).
I can’t wait to tell Eric I found his diagnosis!
Haha — what a great post to start the morning off with! These look utterly amazing!!!
Thanks Andrea! :)
I dream about the chocolate river from Willy Wonka all the time!! When I was young I was jealous of Augustus for getting to drink it – until he got sucked up that tube – then I was scared. How totally awesome would it be to have a chocolate river (w/o a strong suction tube, that is) ?!
haha same here…I LOVE that movie!
I need to make these now! And I love this post because it is so true for women!
Great recipe and I totally agree with you about IMS. It really does exist and once a month!
I love anything that resembles a granola bar. I can’t wait to try these!!
This post completely cracked me up. All true. And those look delicious!
Hey I’m new to your blog.
Your pictures are simple to die for. Well, die’s dramatic…let’s say DROOL for ;)
I love your recipe section. Going to look through it and print some treats off, they look yummy and ‘easy’.. i will pretend the end results resemble yours…!
S.X
Thank you Suzie!
Oh IMS is very real! :-) Just wait until you get pregnant and he starts having sympathy cravings…
These bars look amazing and I can’t wait to try them! I’m sure they’ll be a hit with my husband and 2 year old.
sympathy cravings..lol…I bet!
I had no idea there was a legit name for it, can’t wait to tell my husband about that! He suffers as well ;)
hahahah irritable male syndrome! I wil have to remember that! too funny! These bars look great!
these look fabulous i definitely bake better when I pms too :)
Wow these sound incredible!
These look delicious!! Can’t wait to make them :)
I’d say you come up with some rockin’ recipes all the time but these take the cake! Holy yum!
Anyone know if there is a way to make these toffee bars gluten- free? Could you just substitute gluten-free flour?
Im not sure but I would try GF oats and then for the flour, just process the oats into a flour.
I’m going to make them today with gf oats and my gf flour blend of rice/potato/tapioca. Will let you know how they turn out!
Great! Thanks Angela!
Cool look forward to it!
I too was imaging what I would do to make these gluten-free. Instead of the GF oats I might try quinoa flakes.
So the gf flour turned out great. Also made them with 3/4c almonds and 1/4 walnuts and flax instead of chia seeds. Awesome!
I love homemade granola bars but these… these look great!! love your recipes!
hahahaha this post made me chuckle like a snorting hyena. Soooo true – all of it. The PMS, the IMS and the gorgeous, delightful chocolate chunk toffee bars YUM!
:)
There is an episode of IT crowd featuring Male PMS.. it’s awesome!
I would have to agree, I made your Five Ingredient Cheeze sauce (over quinoa and bbq tofu) last night and it was perfect and filling comfort food :)
Hi Minnooo, glad you enjoyed the cheeze sauce! Ill have to try it over quinoa!
These look like a delicious addition for hiking. Off to the kitchen to try them with almond butter, agave (vs. rice syrup) and macadamia nuts!