Back On Track Green Monster (Banana-Free)


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Aside from my current career in the food business, many of you may not know that I also moonlight as a Barber. The job is not to be taken lightly as it requires a fine attention to detail and precision, something I have no place in assuming much skill. However, I’ve had some practice in this area with recipe development and I figure it’s always wise to develop a new skill set for the resume.

Every month, Eric calls me into the bathroom where I find him stripped down to his boxers with his Deluxe hair trimming set splayed about, clutching the large electric trimmer in one hand. This is when I transform into Barber Extraordinaire cutting his hair while catching up on the day’s gossip just like any good stylist would.

The most difficult aspect of this task is by far the point at which I have to trim the base of his hairline and make a very, very, very straight line. The first time I did it, I felt like I was trying to pipe a gingerbread cookie, my hands shaky and my pulse escalating. But now that I’ve been cutting his hair for over 10 years, I swear I could do it in my sleep. It’s really fool proof!!

"Looks good to me", I say with a nod then disappear from the room.

Except this time Eric returned home from work with some rather upsetting news.

"Pete had a good laugh today."

"Oh yea?"

"We were out for lunch and Pete gave a couple glances at the back of my hair. He said ‘Man, who cut your hair…Did you cut it yourself?’”

“I said ‘No, Ange did.’”

That’s when I piped in, “He loved it, right?”

“Then Pete said ‘Did you look at it? Man, you better go take a look at the back of your hair in the mirror. It’s so crooked it looks like a ski slope.’”

I took one look at Eric’s hair and it looked like a 2 year old set loose on it. Pete was right, I botched that cut almost worse than the time I cut off my best friends beautiful long hair as a 5 year old.

“Oh my Goooood. How did I…”

I burst out laughing and could not stop. Tears came, from laughing so hard.

“You’re fired.”

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I tell you, the first day back at the job (he was desperate), was rather anxiety-provoking. I trimmed that hair so straight you could’ve put a laser level on it and it would pass with flying colours. So far, no more comments from Pete, but I might have a few choice words for him next time he’s over.

As for our professional relationship, I’m happy to say that Eric and I have put this matter behind us.

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Thankfully, smoothies, do not require such precision and attention to detail; after all, I make them first thing in the morning when I’m still half asleep. I’ve only had a couple explosions so far.

This Green Monster is great for getting your healthy eating back on track after a series of indulgences. It sets your day on the right tone and instantly makes you feel ah-mazing. For the banana haters out there, you’ll be pleased to know that this one is banana-free. As with any smoothie, feel free to play around with the ingredients to suit your own taste buds. You might like more or less lemon, ginger, apple, etc.

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Back on Track Green Monster (Banana Free)

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Yield: 3 cups


  • 1 cup kale
  • 1 large Gala apple (or other sweet apple), roughly chopped
  • 1 English cucumber, peeled and roughly chopped
  • 1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
  • 1 tsp fresh grated ginger
  • 1/2 tbsp coconut oil
  • Maple syrup, to taste (I used 1/2 tbsp or so)
  • 4-5 Ice cubes
  • Protein powder, optional


1. Place all ingredients except maple syrup and ice into a high-speed blender and blend on high until very smooth. Blend in ice and maple syrup to taste.

2. Guzzle.

3. Feel amazing.


Happy Thanksgiving to all my readers in the US! I hope you have a fun, safe, and happy holiday weekend.

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{ 188 comments… read them below or add one }

Jennifer @ Peanut Butter and Peppers November 23, 2012

Oh my gosh that is so funny!! I have cut my Husbands hair from time to time and he always tells me I do it lope sided. lol, I can’t make a straight line on anything no matter how hard I try, whether it’s drawing, gardening, cutting fabric, cutting out cookies, or cutting hair. So odd! Sorry for the rambling! The Back on Track Green Monster drink sounds amazing!!


Chelsea @ One Healthy Munchkin November 23, 2012

Haha that’s too funny! I’ve never tried cutting someone else’s hair because one time in third grade I wanted bangs, so I cut some for myself and obviously they turned out terrible! I haven’t trusted myself around hair since then. :P


Lauren November 23, 2012

Hahaha, this post had me laughing because I used to cut my husband’s hair as well, and I believe he had the same scenario happen where a work buddy pointed out my craftsmanship (or lack thereof). He now shaves his head, and I don’t have to worry about it, although he tries to even get me to do that for him!

I love that there are no bananas in this smoothie. My daughter is allergic, and I can often feel the effects of too much sugar if I eat them consistently. :-)


Carissa November 23, 2012

I cut my husband’s hair, too. There was a sketchy time in there after I accidentally cut his ear… We use a sheet to cover him & catch hair – it now has a bloodstain that won’t come out, a constant reminder of what I did! But he still let’s me cut it. Brave man.


Laura November 23, 2012

Just made this . . . I forgot how much I loved ginger in smoothies. Thanks and have a great weekend:)


Colleen ( November 23, 2012

Hi Angela!
This was funny! My hubby usually cuts his own, but occasionally he’s had me do that straight line in the back — nerve racking!! This smoothie sounds similar to the one I make — it’s the Dr Oz Green Drink — kale would be a good substitute when I’m out of spinach! Anyway, I LOVE YOUR website!!!!!!! No wonder you’re so popular!!! I’ve seen links in a million places to you, but I finally got to checking it out and I’ve already found 10+ recipes that all seem like ones I MUST try! Amazing that you were posting 3x a day for at least a year (maybe it was much more?!) !!! You’re very creative and entertaining and I really admire your work!!! As a person with a passion for helping people be healthier, I thank you for spreading SO much health around the world!!!! Hope you’re enjoying your day! And if you care to, I would love if you stop by to see my humble little site of nutrition and wellness! Take care! I’ll be back soon AND OFTEN!!!!
Colleen :)


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 25, 2012

Hey Colleen, Thank you so much for leaving me such a lovely comment! I’m so happy to hear you enjoy the blog. I will be sure to check out your site!


Shari W November 23, 2012

What kind of coconut oil do you prefer to use?


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 25, 2012

I use one from Costco – it’s organic cold-pressed unrefined.


Lia November 23, 2012

I’m always looking for banana free smoothie ideas because sometimes you just start to feel like you eat way too many bananas. At least I do. Thanks for this! I also do haircuts mostly for the men in my life, and I’m always terrified of the back too!! And around the ears. Glad you sorted the line out ;)


Stephanie November 23, 2012

that looks so good. I’m craving a green smoothie now!


Nat November 24, 2012

have you heard about making your own VEGAN BUTTER?


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 25, 2012

Yes!! I have been meaning to try it out :) So fun


Robyn November 24, 2012

Just made this after an awesome leisurely 13 K , gorgeous run…I too added fresh coconut water…I use to hairdress,,,now I only get stuck with one gorwn kid(he doesn’t like to spend the $$ on an actual hairdresser) and the hubby,,,hair every where,,,then I feel like I have to clean the whole house!


Amber from Slim Pickin's Kitchen November 24, 2012

Bwahahahahaaahaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! I laughed hysterically when I read this! I was actually just talking to my sis-in-law earlier this evening about how I cut my hubs hair too. I am totally with you when it came to the first time…I was terrified. I was so frickin’ scared I was going to hurt him I about had a heart attack. Luckily, we haven’t had any mishaps yet…but it would be kinda funny if we did! ;)


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 25, 2012

Best of luck to you….hahah


kaylee November 25, 2012

Hi, Angela! I always love to see your blog!
My sister doesn’t like banana, so I’m going to try this one ;)


Liz November 25, 2012

I have been using Kale in my smoothies for about a year now. I always feel like I am have a super health drink when I do this. I am sure it is healthy, but I like the mental feeling I get, if that makes since. Of course yours looks way better than mine, so I will have to give it a try. :)


Sonal November 25, 2012

Hahaha poor Eric! But they always come back…;) I love my green monsters with banana, definitely not a hater!


Cindy November 25, 2012

Can’t wait to try this. Is this a serving for one? Or more?


Amber @ Busy, Bold, Blessed November 25, 2012

My boyfriend has super curly hair, I will NOT be cutting it any time soon haha.

I definitely need to get back on track after the holiday weekend! I recently tried kale for the first time and liked it, but still haven’t put it in a green smoothie. Need to do this soon!


kaity @ kaityscooking November 25, 2012

yummm i get a juice from this local cafe thats apple kale ginger and lemon and its uhhhmazing! i cant wait to make this!


Radhika Sarohia November 26, 2012

Guzzle and feel amazing, awesome

P.S. I cut my own hair and it looks horrendous haha


Laurie November 26, 2012

This is great!! I used spinach instead of the kale, and I used extra spinach because I didn’t have any cucumbers on hand. I also added 1 fresh pineapple core, used honey instead of the maple syrup, and ground ginger because i didn’t have fresh, and added some cayenne pepper! I also added water to this. Invigorating!


Jeannie November 26, 2012

Hi, is that a glass straw in your smoothie? Do you mind telling me where you found it and whether you like it (is it durable)? I’ve been on the hunt for one. thanks!


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 27, 2012

Hey Jeannie, It’s from an online company called Glass D’harma. I love them! I have had one break on me before (it was dropped) but the company replaced it for me. If you are fairly gentle with them, it shouldn’t be an issue. I like that it isn’t plastic. Just be sure to rinse them with water right after using or the smoothies can harden on the inside. I rinse with water and then pop them into the dishwasher.


Dawn November 27, 2012

I just made this for breakfast and it was WONDERFUL!! I’m just about to make up a big batch of the detox salad. Thank you so much for your wonderful blog and for sharing all of your fabulous recipes.


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 27, 2012

Thank you for trying out the recipes! :)


Caitlin Riley November 27, 2012

Hi Angela!

I’ve been neglecting my body and my health overall in recent months and I really need to get back on track. Being a single mother who works full-time, I’ve been seeking out quick breakfast options for myself and your Green Monster sounds ideal! My only concern is the English cucumber. I personally have a very difficult time digesting cucumber in any form; how necessary is the cucumber to the recipe? Or do you have any suggestion for a substitution? Any help you could offer me would be awesome! Thanks!

Oh, and I discovered your blog just today and I can’t stop playing around on here! You’re an inspiration :)


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 27, 2012

Hey Caitlin, I use the cucumber mainly as a filler in the smoothie due to its high water content and fairly neutral flavour. You could probably sub coconut water or another high water veggie. goodluck!


Cacau Correa November 28, 2012

Do you think it is OK to freeze the smoothie?
I was thinking if that would work … so I could make a batch sunday night and have it in the office every morning …


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 28, 2012

I’m not sure, but it might be worth a shot. I would try just a single serving to test it in case it doesnt work. Let me know how it goes!


Trina November 28, 2012

I’ve been lurking for years and had to comment. First of all, I think you are a food genius. I have lost over 20lbs using your various recepies. I made the banana free green monster and it was DELICIOUS. Even though I love banana’s sometimes I want to cut back on the calories from them and didn’t think I would enjoy a smoothie without one. I substituted protein powder with greek yogurt and added Vanilla Stevia instead of Maple Syrup. Thanks again.


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 29, 2012

Hey Trina, Congrats on your weight loss! Good for you. Thanks so much for your lovely comment. All my best.


Dheana November 28, 2012

First of all, your photos are GORGEOUS! I just found your site and am totally hooked!
I’ve been drinking green smoothies for a couple of years and just this week thought I’d try them without the banana. Love bananas but variety is good. The addition of the apple is enticing – I can’t wait to try it.
Your story – too funny. I’m thankful my hubby shaves his head. I did try trimming his beard though once, slipped and gave him a bald spot. Oops! :)
BTW, is that a glass straw?


Stephanie November 29, 2012

Guzzling my green monster as I type. Actually, my 2 yr old is as well, and is sporting a very yummy and very green moustache! Thank you, thank you, thank you for a banana free recipe! It is delish!


Angela (Oh She Glows) November 30, 2012

Thats great!! Thanks for letting me know


Audra December 2, 2012

Thank you:
A. I love your blog and have been experimenting with your recipes a lot lately.
B. Your story about ski sloping your husbands head made me laugh so hard I cried a little bit.


Angela (Oh She Glows) December 2, 2012

hah you are sweet! I will have to do that to Eric’s hair more often then…muhauau


alana December 3, 2012

I’ve left the banana out before (because I realized too late that I was out of them) and I realized it seemed to be the key to making a green smoothie tasty – without the banana all I could taste was spinach, lol, I’m excited to try this version!


Alex December 10, 2012

hi angela, i love the idea of your green monsters but for me here in australia Kale is virtually non existant, and moreso, apples are a major no-no for me (along with all other stonefruits, my IBS-sy stomach just can’t handle them) what are your best substitutes?


Angela (Oh She Glows) December 10, 2012

Hi Alex, you could try spinach or chard?


Brigitte December 12, 2012

I was wondering if you can make this the night before, will it be still good?? I tend to make my smoothies the night before as not to wake the house up since i leave really to go to work??


Angela (Oh She Glows) December 12, 2012

Yes Im sure you can. Just place it in a sealed container in the fridge and give it a good stir in the morning before drinking :)


Beverly December 13, 2012

So happy to see a banana free smoothie!! I am allergic to bananas and pretty much every healthy smoothie has them in it! Thanks!


Ayla Perry December 18, 2012


Just wondering if Spinach would work for the “back on track green monster” smoothie? Where I’m from it’s hard to get kale outside of its season.




Angela (Oh She Glows) December 18, 2012

Yes it certainly would work! Enjoy :)


Cecily December 28, 2012

I’m new to Green Monsters, but plan on doing a 3 day detox after the new year. I want to incorporate these as a regular morning meal. Do you drink all 3 cups in 1 serving? Or is it 1 cup per serving? Thanks!


Angela (Oh She Glows) December 28, 2012

Yes I usually drink the entire thing….love em too much not too ;) enjoy


Christine January 5, 2013

Angela, just made the green monster today using this recipe. Best green monster recipe I’ve ever made!!! The ginger was such a nice addition. My 6 year old liked it but only when I made it without the ginger, which he thinks is too spicy. This is going to be a regular on my weeky menu, thank you!!!


Cara January 14, 2013

Could honey be used instead of maple syrup? Not much of a maple syrup fan…


Angela (Oh She Glows) January 14, 2013

I cant see why not! Enjoy


Agnes January 15, 2013

I just tried this smoothie and either I did something wrong or this just isn’t my kind of smoothie. It came out very … thick. Is this normal? The consistency is almost like celery after it’s been chewed: fibrous and watery, whereas I’m used to smoothies being slightly thick but not so much that I need to chew them.
The only thing I did not add was the protein powder. Would that help? Or am I just the odd lamb out and perhaps I’ll never experience the joys of green smoothie pastures.


Angela (Oh She Glows) January 15, 2013

Hi Agnes, hmm….mine was not very thick at all so Im not sure why. Did you make any changes to the recipe? Does your blender normally have a hard time blending things like kale very smooth?


Agnes January 17, 2013

I haven’t really had problems with my blender (even though it isn’t one of the top ones). After looking at other green smoothie recipes, I’m wondering if the order of blending might have something to do with it. Perhaps I’ll try again blending each of the ingredients separately.
Thank you!


Laura January 18, 2013

Thanks for this! I’m allergic to bananas, and it’s difficult to find smoothie recipes that don’t have them (understandable as they’re delicious, and thickening).


Meri January 20, 2013

Earlier your Green Monster included chia seeds & lemon grass powder. Which of these is causing the (most) laxative effect? These are delish but I found out I need to stay near home. Yipes! Will this effect decrease?


Angela (Oh She Glows) January 21, 2013

Yipes indeed! hah. It could be the chia seeds. I`ve never tried lemon grass powder before though, so I would read up on that too. Better luck next time!


Ashley January 25, 2013

Laughing out load as this exact thing takes place in our home as well! Great smoothie too.


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