It’s been awhile since I did a Life with a Baby update – 2 months in fact! This is for a couple reasons. First, my cookbook creation has been taking up all of my time when I’m not with Adriana. And second, after the reaction to my post about Adriana’s diet, I questioned whether I wanted to write about her on the baby blog in the future. I don’t mind that my post created debate, but what got to me was that I inadvertently put her under this scrutiny that she didn’t ask for. I felt HUGE guilt. So I went into this “protective mommy defensive mode”, and I removed every. single. picture. of her face from my blog and social media. Call it rash, call it being overprotective, call it hormonal, but it was something I felt compelled to do after the hateful words that were being directed to my family. Obviously, I never knew that it would cause such a hateful reaction by a select few people, but as they say, live and learn. Some of you noticed and applauded my decision, some of you said you wished that I would continue to share. I get both sides, I really do.
I think many families today struggle with the question of how much to share about their children online. It’s something we’ve discussed at great length. How much is too much? Should her pictures be online at all? And if so, until what age? We don’t have all the answers or even many, but we’re just trying to be aware and make the best decisions for our family. We’ve always erred on the side of “less is more”, but lately even more so. Our views will likely change and evolve over the years, I’m sure.
I don’t think I have to abandon these updates all together though. They are, I feel, an amazing way to document milestones in her life and to connect with all of you. I love reading your stories and comments. Plus, I don’t want this blog to be impersonal or robotic; what made my blog successful from the beginning was my ability to share my story honestly and candidly. Writing is a huge part of who I am. But as the blog has grown, I’ve felt this internal conflict between what to share and what not to share. I think it’s something many bloggers can relate to. You go from having one reader to thousands of readers and suddenly you scrutinize every word on the page. I know a lot of bloggers chose not to share anything about their personal lives, which I respect entirely, but that has never felt like a good fit for my own style. I love to write and share about daily life. I guess it’s a balance that I’ll struggle with daily.
I’d love to hear your thoughts below on this topic of sharing and social media. Do you struggle with how much to share online?
Hello Angela !
I’m sorry to hear you received such harsh comments following some of your posts. One of the things I like most about your blog (other than the delicious recipes and the funny style style in which you write ;)) is how you share your thoughts, opinions and choices without ever pretending to know best or to own the absolute truth. Whenever I read your blog, it feels like you are telling me «here’s what I did, why, and how it worked out for me» rather than «here’s what I think everyone should do» and thanks to that, I don’t feel uncomfortable disagreeing with you from time to time and I can read your blog without feeling judged or judgemental myself even when I don’t share your point of view. Anyway, it’s not like anyone is forced to read it, right ? Personnally, I enjoy having a peek into a real-busy-working-vegan-mom’s everyday life, even and especially because you don’t always make the choices I would make, and I’m curious to see how it turns out for you. I guess I just hope that you manage not to let a few loud hateful words overpower the larger, but often much quieter, support of people who truly appreciate your work.
Hello,
It has been a while since I have read your blog. Was an avid reader/follower while in college but then life took place. ha I have a 15 month old and cannot even imagine the negative things ppl would comment. I am so sorry for such shitty ppl you and and baby girl don’t deserve it. I will be reading more regularly even if I have to do it at work (ha) but I understand what you mean. I don’t even know how I would react about negativity towards my baby girl. How is that even possible. Adriana is beautiful and such a happy baby. Good Luck to you!
I haven’t been keeping up on my blog list lately. Logged in today and stumbled across this unfortunate post. Looks like I’m adding this blog to a growing list of food blogs I’ve unfollowed as a result of losing interest once focus shifts to the blogger’s spawn.
Truly, do you think anyone cares about whether or not your kid’s face is shown on the blog? I’m really not intending that as a mean-spirited comment but an honest question. Who cares. It’s a blog. They’re photos. What do you think is going to happen? I used to come here for fun recipes and inspiration. Now the blog is full of self-righteous “mama-bear” drivel and countless novel-length posts about an infant I couldn’t care less about. If you don’t want to share stuff about your kid, or your travels, or the area in which you live (using instances of stuff other bloggers have dangled in front of readers only to later yank away) then simply do not mention it at all. This sad mind-game bloggers play (write 10,000 posts about child, take deeply personal offense at the first mildly negative comment received, completely fly off the handle and write 10,000 more posts about how awful it is to be a blogger with a child that people *gasp* comment on) is old and tired. You are neither the first nor the last blogger to have a child. It simply is not a big deal.
I’d also love to see a veggie-friendly blog written by a strong & independent woman who has no desire to become a mother. I’m sure this would please those women going through infertility issues as well as women like me who simply have zero interest in what foods a strange infant can and cannot eat. I’ve read around the baby posts but it’s difficult to successfully avoid comments and stories about children once a blogger gives birth and the blog inevitably becomes focused mainly on the child and how the blogger is handling having the child around.
Again – not intending this to be mean-spirited. Just trying to give some honest insight from one of your long-time readers who is headed out the door. Go ahead, comment “good riddance” all you want – I won’t be back to follow up so no need to rant or argue or tell me how wrong and awful I am.
Dear, I bought your cookbook first and only came to your blog now after LOOOOOVING your recipes. We’ve gone from vegetarian to vegan, me, hubby, our 2 year old toddler and 8 month baby, we have never eveeeeer, eveeeerrr been or felt so healthy our children have a very similar diet to Adriana we get vitamin D from sunshine lots of omegas from chia and flaxseeds, let haters hate, they are just afraid of what they are doing to their own children. Let us share our love and thanks for what you are doing and our love to you and your gorgeous family, Mima
I have spent the afternoon reading about your journey during pregnancy and Motherhood. It reminded me of when I was pregnant and a new Mom over 40 years ago. I am deeply saddened that people responded hatefully to your sharing your choice of diet for your beautiful daughter. It is a very personal decision. I admire that you are giving her an opportunity to try a variety of foods. Some parent get so hung up on making all of their children’s decision that they forget that they have minds of their own that need to be nurtured and allowed freedom of choice. I decided 3 weeks ago that I would no longer participate in the maltreatment of animals. I also am gluten, soy and sugar free My husband’s first response was “pretty soon you won’t have anything to eat. My husband is enjoying the variety of foods that we eat and quite surprised at how good the meals are. Your blog has been an integral part of my journey. Thanks so much for sharing.