It probably sounds silly, but I already feel nostalgic for the passing days of this super sweet newborn stage. Everyone is warning me about how fast the newborn stage goes and I want to cry when I think about how quickly the days are flying by. There’s just something incredibly beautiful about a tiny human being entirely dependent on their parents. I’m trying to soak up and imprint into memory every snuggle, kiss, silly face, and squeak. I had a moment the other day when I had to pack away a few newborn sleepers that are too small for Adriana now. Sniff.
It’s hard being a new mom though. Shocker, I know. And so humbling. Life is crazier than ever and some days I feel like nothing more than a weepy milk maid, but I’ve never felt so very lucky and happy at the same time. This new role is a bit like my experience with labour – I didn’t really know how crazy hard it would be until I was in the thick of it (which is probably a good thing).
The first week was so, so hard. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so much self-doubt about everything all at once. There is so much to learn right off the bat. And the hormones…oh my gosh. I would go from feeling elated on a total high to feeling completely overwhelmed. I wasn’t prepared for the challenges of breastfeeding, for starters. Sure, I watched lots of videos and we met with our lactation consultant before I delivered, but my experience was nothing like the happy breastfeeding moms I saw in the videos. They made it look so effortless with their babies demonstrating picture perfect latches, and the moms changing up positions like a pro. Adriana didn’t latch for the first day at all, and not much at all the second day, despite a team of us in the hospital trying to make it happen. I felt like I was failing at something I wanted to happen so badly. I could see her getting more and more frustrated with each attempt at feeding and I knew if I didn’t make it happen soon she would be losing more weight. I felt defeated. Adriana hadn’t developed her sucking reflex yet, so she tended to “chomp” on my nipple. My nipples were raw for the first several days, despite using every nipple cream under the sun. Luckily, our lactation consultant met with us the first night we got home from the hospital and she suggested that we try the side-lying position in bed or on the couch. Well, it was sooo much easier in this position. Adriana latched so much easier. Day by day, things started to fall into place after that. Many times I wanted to give up, but I thought of you all saying to give breastfeeding two weeks (or 6 weeks or 2 months!), so I kept at it. Here we are two weeks later and I’m happy to say that breastfeeding is coming along great. I feel like we’ve gotten over the most difficult part now. We’re still trying to master the seated positions, but I’m confident that we will get it in time. Lately, we’ve been logging around 5 hours per day of breastfeeding. I had no idea it would take up this much time (it feels like a full time job!), but I’m sure some day in the not so distant future I’ll be longing for this precious bonding time again. My advice is don’t lose hope or feel like you are alone if you are struggling with breastfeeding because you certainly aren’t the only one. Knowing that other moms struggled during the early days really helped reassure me that we could work past it too. I recommend finding a good lactation consultant and checking out the breastfeeding website called Kelly Mom.
Because we struggled with feeding during the first several days, our lactation consultant and nurses recommended that we write down all of Adriana’s feedings to keep track of things until she got the hang of feeding. For a few days we were writing everything on a pen and paper which wasn’t overly convenient and we found ourselves forgetting to log overnight. So I decided to search for an app and came across the free Baby Tracker App. Well, it has simplified things so much. You can track feedings (the time, which boob you started on, and how long per side), diaper changes, sleep, pumping, and more. There is a detail list view of the entire day so you can easily see the whole day at a glance. Genius!! I can’t say enough good things about this app! I don’t plan on tracking forever (I’ve already stopped tracking diaper changes since everything is on track), but I think it can be very helpful in the early stages for a new mom. A reader also said it’s a great way to determine when they are going through a growth spurt (you can compare total daily feeding time across days and easily spot when there is a spike).
It’s true what our pediatrician told us – days 4 and 5 were the hardest. I’m so glad she told us this at our first appointment because we were ready for it. I read that newborns go through their first growth spurt shortly after coming home from the hospital and I think Adriana did too. She was so fussy for a few days and some nights she cluster fed until 4:30am (she was basically feeding every 30 minutes for hours on end). I was trying to get by on 1-2 hours of sleep. But after those few hard days things got so much better. The past several nights I’ve been getting a total of 5-6 hours of (broken up) sleep and I feel so much more like myself. I’m surprised by how little sleep I can function on. The body really does adapt.
Side note: This swaddleme sleeper is a game changer. When we started putting this on her before bed at night she went from sleeping 30-60 minute intervals to 2-3 hour stretches. We were swaddling her previously with a normal swaddle blanket, but she would always wiggle it off and then wake up because she got cold. The Velcro swaddlers are where it’s at.
Week 2…was sooo much better! Honestly, it’s like night and day. We both feel so much more confident as parents this past week.
I’m enjoying…journaling, both written and with photographs. I bought this Mom’s One Line a Day book to record memories. The first 3 days it was blank and I started to question whether I could keep up with it! But I got caught up and I’m really enjoying writing a memory down from each day. It will be a miracle if I can do it for 5 years, especially if we have another baby in a couple years. But here’s hoping I can at least do the first year?
Our cat Sketchie…isn’t overly happy that there is a new creature in the house that is louder, poopier, needier, and more dramatic than he is. At first he was terrified of Adriana, but he has warmed up to her now and likes to be in the same room as us again. We’ve been trying to give him lots of affection so he doesn’t feel left out. I think he’s starting to come around slowly but surely.
The first time I laughed after labour…was when I was handed my first “monster pad” after delivery. They are HUGE! I was expecting a slightly bigger version of an overnight pad, but oh no. God no. These monster pads are about 2 feet long and 3/4 of a foot wide. Friggin hilarious. The nurse said, “Don’t you have any underwear bigger than those??” Tip: When they say bring huge granny panties, they mean it! Then the nurse stuck a frozen padsicle (just pads soaked in witch hazel and frozen) on top of the monster pad and I waddled to my room.
I’ve never been so…thirsty!!! I honestly can’t get enough fluids into me. I’m also eating like crazy. Two breakfasts, two lunches…you get the idea. This mama needs her fuel!
My recovery has been…slower than I would’ve hoped. I honestly didn’t expect to be this sore after birth (not sure why!). I think the side-lying breastfeeding position has been great for my recovery though because it’s forced me to be completely off my feet for hours each day. Now that I’m at the 2 week mark, I am seeing a big improvement. I’m no longer waddling around like I have a pole shoved up my butt (lol) and I’m feeling more like myself each day. Time heals all wounds!
To pump or not to pump…I wasn’t sure if I would need a breast pump right away, but I ended up having to buy one almost immediately since Adriana wasn’t latching on very well and my breasts become engorged and painful when my milk came in. Oye. The pump wasn’t as scary as I thought though and I was so happy to have some relief.
I’m thankful for…a healthy baby. I’m so grateful she is doing well. Also, I’m thankful for Eric and his general awesomeness. He’s a great dad and has taken such an active role in her care.
Our second pediatrician visit…We met with our pediatrician for the second appointment and I was thrilled to find out that Adriana had already surpassed her birth weight. She is gaining on average 45 grams per day (the doctor said 15-30 grams a day is great) which made this new nursing mama very happy to see that we are on track. Her next appointment is at the 1 month mark.
Nothing beats a…hot shower in the morning. Hot showers have taken on a whole new meaning of joy in my life!!
Nicknames…Adriana’s current nickname is “monkey” or “milk monster”
Adriana lights up when… I sing her “Your Song” – the one we played to her while she was in my belly (we love the Ellie Goulding version). She also loves Eric playing the guitar for her. She also lights up after letting out some gas (lol) and loves to crack a silly smile! Often when she hears my voice she starts making eating motions with her mouth. She sure knows who her milk maid is!
V.I.P’s…We were all spoiled to have “Mimi” (my mom) here for a full week. My stepdad (“Papa”) came later in the week too. Not going to lie, I was so bummed when they went back home to Alberta. Adriana also got to meet her “Babcha” “Babcia” and “Granddad” (Eric’s mom and dad), “Gigi” (my grandma), second cousins, great aunts, aunts, uncles, and more.
She made it through her first…newborn photo shoot! It was a long shoot – about 3.5 hours and I had to feed her multiple times during it to keep her nice and sleepy. She also pooped all over her mom and dad, lol. We got some family photos (including some 3 generation photos with my mom). Here are a couple sneak peeks from behind the scenes…
Thank you for all your congrats and kind words on my birth announcement post! We are so thankful to have such an amazing group of people reading this blog.
If you’d like to see more pictures from the past two weeks, you can see them on my personal Instagram account: @theglowspot
Congrats on being a new mom. It is certainly life changing, exhausting but the most amazing thing ever. I love your website and recipes and as a mom to a now-toddler (whew.. what happened, he was just a newborn) I use your recipes for dinner ideas and even though we are not vegan, we modify with what we have in the house. Your recipes and your blog are an inspiration. I wish you the best of everything being a new mom- take care of yourself and enjoy every second. It does go by so fast.
Your recipes are amazing, I love your blog. I have to be quick, but I wanted to share a tip that worked for me. One really helpful thing for me with breastfeeding sitting up was using a breastfriend pillow. My lactation consultant swore by them for smaller women. The boppy made things way harder for me. Good luck with it all! It took 6 weeks until it was a complete joy for me, but now it is!
Hey Kat, Thanks for the tip! I have the boppy and I have to admit, it is such a pain to use right now! Are you using the My Breast Friend pillow specifically?
Hi Angela,
Yes, the my Breast Friend pillow is what I used. It raised my baby up just to the right level for the perfect latch. another helpful piece of advice my lactation consultant gave me was when nursing felt really hard and painful, watch tv while nursing to shift my attention. I felt guilty not staring into baby eyes, but it helped immensely! Best of luck!
I third the suggestion for miracle blankets – for babies that like being swaddled but wiggle out it is a game changer! Plus, it was a little complicated to learn and I could use that as an excuse to make my husband put the babies back to sleep after they ate! We worked as a team – he would change them, I would feed them he would put them back in the crib. That way we were both up and no one felt abused and no one felt left out. It is so easy to feel like everything is on you and you are the only one working when you are the food source. I also like the coconut oil for pumping and I would put it on right after each feeding because we had problems with thrush and that seemed to prevent it in both of us. It also helped with dry cracking and chafing from leaking and being moist. I liked Milkies too – it looks weird but I made so much that when the babies would eat I would leak like a faucet on the other side – we could save 2-4 oz. each feed with the Milkies and use those later when I went back to work. That stuff is like liquid gold I hated wasting an ounce. Also, as a final thought – lots of people my age were never breastfed at all, doctors told our parents formula was best. We are all okay. It is so much more important to have a healthy happy mom than to have any particular other “best” baby thing – like breastfeeding. If something is stressing you out and “just too hard” and you really don’t want to do it any more – then stop whatever it is- and take care of yourself first so you can actually care for the baby. It’s not really going to make a huge difference in 20 years :)
Thank you for your comment Allison! It sounds like you guys operated the way we have been – I do input, Eric does output (not an exact science because I do diapers and whatnot when it’s just easier at times, but it’s a nice system that seems to be working well!)
Hi, I´m a portuguese fan and I discovered recently your blog!!! First of all congratulations!!! I have 2 boys. One has almost 3 years and the youngest has 4 months. I would like to tell you that I read an important book from Dr Harvey Karp – Happiest baby on the block, that helps you to make your baby sleeping better!! For me it was very important!!! I love your blog! Enjoy this beautiful time with your daughter!!!
Andreia
So precious. You are doing a great job!! Way to stick with the breastfeeding; it’s so rewarding. Keep it up, mama!
OMG, those pads they give you are like a mattress between your legs, right?!
Also, I totally get what you mean about feeling nostalgic for “the early days”. I remember taking baths during those first two weeks of Eden’s life and sobbing because she was already so grown up. I calculated how many months it was until she left to go to college. I remember about 2 weeks in saying to Jason, “I want to have a baby again. I miss the baby stage.” to which he replied, “Sarah, we are in the baby stage. Right. Now.”
Anyway, I love your update. I cling onto every word. Those first few weeks/months are so so precious and I think you are doing a great job of savoring them. Love to you and your family.
its true! Enjoy these days (and all the rest!) I bawled like a baby today when I put jeans on my eight month old for the first time — my hub thought I was loosing my mind but it was hard to see that baby of mine looking more like a kid. When did that happen?? The first 3 months are the hardest, it gets easier. (BTW congratulations and best wishes!)
Aw Kris, that is so sweet! God, that is so going to be me, hah.
Congratulations. All of us In the net are thrilled for you, especially that breast feeding isn’t too difficult for you. You have brought us so much joy with your wonderful recipes; happiness should come back to you in spades!
Congrats on your new little sweet pea! Your story of the first couple weeks sounds so much like my own; my little boy arrived 9/28; the first week was so trying, just as you described. We’re coming to the end of our second week now and every day things are a little better. Not going to lie, I’m really looking forward to him sleeping more then 2-3 hrs at a time, especially during the night! Lack of sleep is probably the hardest part for me; that and not having my husband home with me all day; sometimes it feels like I’m doing this on my own. Someone has to go to work though! Looking forward reading more about you and your newbie’s journey together!
Congratulations!!! Such a beautiful girl and had to write to tell you to give your body time to heal! I was so desperate to get back in the gym and mistakenly attempted a jog when my daughter was 3 weeks – bad idea! Take the time to heal and you will be back to normal in no time :) it goes by so fast my daughter is now 17 months.
Very wise advice :) I have no desire to workout right now (lol), but I am enjoying some light walking for recovery now and then.
When I had my first child, I thought breastfeeding was going to come so natural. Ha! It did not! We both had to learn to do it:) Then, I realized with each child you still have to relearn the process and so does baby (even after baby #5). SO glad to hear you didn’t give up and its going well! The joys received from breastfeeding are definitely worth the struggle.
Oh, Angela! I was almost in tears while reading this post because it is all so overwhelming isn’t it? ESPECIALLY breastfeeding!!! People can tell you all day long how hard it is, but you’ll never truly understand until you’ve been there. I would cry and cry and cry because I was so freaking exhausted, and we had a preemie so I swear he ate even more than a term newborn. I felt exactly like a moo cow. I was always told to make it to the 6 week mark and things will change and, now that I’m 13 months into breastfeeding our son, that advice couldn’t have been more true! It’s almost like once you hit that 6 week mark it has become such a part of you and it is so natural. I’m *SO* glad I stuck with it, but I’m not going to lie. Breastfeeding and child birth are the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. I’m going to have to start weaning my son soon, and it breaks my heart to thing about…but then again I can’t wait to be done and have my body back either! Being a new parent is so, so, so, so, so, so difficult, but it’s so rewarding! I was also shocked by how sore I was. I couldn’t freakin’ believe it, and it easily lasted 12 weeks postpartum and my baby only weighed 5 lbs! Witch Hazel and hot baths are your friend! So happy for you and your so smart to log your memories daily. Time passes WAY too quickly!
thank you for this comment Amber! I feel so much more normal to know you experienced similar things. Just gotta keep on truckin…just like labour! hah.
Congratulations Angela and Hubby,
I ran across your site while looking for articles on how to roast pumpkin seeds. My granddaughter is here, and we are carving a pumpkin. I was intrigued when I saw your post journaling your pregnancy and the birth of your daughter. Much to my granddaughter’s chagrin, I spent a few minutes reading your posts and looking at photos of you and your beautiful daughter. It was so heartwarming to read about such a loving mother and father. As a retired teacher, my wish would be for all children to have such a caring family. Enjoy your baby, and I hope to check back on you as you journey through this new adventure called Motherhood.
Haha, the ‘milk maid’ description seems apt, and was also very funny.. Wow, I’m impressed by how much hard work goes into taking care of a newborn! It looks like you’re doing great, Angela, good luck!! :)
Thank you for sharing your experiences with your pregnancy and beautiful new baby girl with us!
I’m due on April 28th of next year and despite the fact that I am not having an amazingly glowing pregnancy I am very, very excited!
I do have a question for you if you have a minute…it’s about your cat.
Have you had very many problems with the cat since the baby?
I’m terrified that it’s not going to be an easy adjustment and have been advised to find my cat another loving home.
I can’t get rid of my first baby!!
Most of the concern would be from diseases and cat litter and blah blah blah. I can’t read enough about it.
Since I trust your food guru-ness, I thought I’d ask you for your compassionately kitten – tastic opinion.
Thank youuu!! ♡♡
Hey Stephanie,
Congrats on your pregnancy!
Sketchie has adapted fairly well to the new baby. The first couple days he was scared of her and wouldn’t go near her at all (he kept his distance), but he seems fine now and even sleeps on our bed again with us. hah. I think like anything it takes time and it’s an adjustment. We’ve made sure to give Sketchie extra affection so he doesn’t feel left out. I think that has helped…of course it’s hard to know what is going through their mind!
Congrats on your lovely baby girl! She’s gorgeous : ) not sure if anyone asked, but where did you get the adorable baby crown? It’s beautiful!
You are doing FANTASTIC! It’s always rough at the beginning, but over time you two will fall right into a routine. My little guy is 11 months old and he is becoming more independent (walking, playing, babbling) so our feedings are less and less. He bf’s mostly before naps, at night. I could feel one day when my breasts were engorged because he wasn’t nursing as much that he’s slowly slipping away from me and his baby days are coming to a close. Enjoy it while you can!
I am so happy for all of you. A happy, healthy baby is such a blessing! Hopefully you are all getting enough rest, good food and laughter! You’ll need it :-) And, just so you know, this next year you will often feel so confused, frustrated and overwhelmed. It’s okay- we all felt that way. It will more than balance out at each little milestone. You’re an awesome mama, I’m sure!
You are doing an awesome job! Adriana is lucky to have you for her mama!
Oh my goodness, she is adorable <3
I just had to cry reading this. What a trooper you are and still maintaining your hilarious sense of humor. I never had children; but reading your comments, I feel firsthand what it’s like. Not all roses and daisies, and yet…well, roses and daisies!
Thank you, Angela, for including and keeping us up-to-date. All the best to you, Eric, Adriana, and Sketchie!