Since I announced my pregnancy last year, I’ve been asked quite often whether we would raise our baby vegan. If I saw the question on my blog or social media, I would respond by saying that we decided not to label her diet or lifestyle and I explained why if I had the time. Since I was asked this question so frequently I recently decided to write a blog post on the topic to be transparent about our decision (see: Will you raise your daughter a vegan?). I’ve always been an open book on the blog and figured I could share our thoughts and also ask you to share your own experiences. I enjoy hearing other perspectives because I’ve never been someone who thinks that there is one correct way to do anything. What works for one family might not work for others.
As I expected, there was a wide range of opinions on the topic. Many of you left thought-provoking and respectful comments (whether you agreed or not), and I greatly enjoyed reading them. They led to some wonderful discussions with friends and family this week. However, there were some hateful and threatening comments attacking me, my family, and our decision. According to some, I’m no longer welcome to call myself vegan. This wasn’t entirely surprising; over the past 6 years I’ve often been accused of not being “vegan enough”, being “too mainstream”, or not “doing enough for the vegan movement”, yet here I was receiving hundreds of comments and emails each month from readers telling me my recipes changed their lives, that they were happy to be helping animals, reducing their carbon footprint, and getting healthy even if they weren’t “perfect”. Apparently, my welcoming and non-judgmental approach was indeed the catalyst for major change.
I realize that the scrutiny I’ve faced over the years is from a small percentage of vegans. Tearing each other down is never conducive to furthering the movement though. The majority of vegans I know are incredibly kind and compassionate both to animals and humans alike. However, the personal attacks have made me reflect greatly about whether this label continues to be right for me. Do I want to live my life striving for an elusive perfection that I know I’m too flawed to ever achieve? Or can I do it my way? While some of you will say “don’t let it bother you” and “don’t let them win” I’ll be honest in telling you that experiencing hate on a public forum from your own community wears you down over time. It’s a distraction from my overall purpose and you know what, it sure as hell takes the fun out of the journey.
In the end, I will keep on doing my thing, but without a personal label on my diet or lifestyle. Going forward you can expect to see the same types of crowd-pleasing plant-based recipes on this blog and in my next cookbook; this is how I love to eat and what makes me happy. My goal has always been to encourage others to reduce their animal consumption and embrace more plants in their diet. This is my passion in life not only because of how it has greatly improved my own and those close to me, but for countless other reasons. I still believe that the greatest change happens when we elevate one another, celebrate progress, and of course, share delicious food that challenges the norms of the standard diet. So that’s exactly what I intend to keep doing. There are many ways in which compassionate individuals can spread their message and this is what speaks to my heart. I have no doubt there is something out there for everyone.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me over the years, and also, for reminding me why it’s important to remain authentic even in spite of criticism.
Angela
Please note comments are now closed – May 20/15
I can’t believe these internet wankers who berate you and others for not aligning themselves with their exact ideologies. Sometimes the internet just serves as a sounding board and sometimes your little piece of the internet is where they hop up on their soapbox. I’ve been reading your blog and following your recipes for years and have to give you some credit for introducing me to delicious vegan meals. All the best to you and your sweet family!
Brava for being true to yourself. It’s the greatest thing you can do for yourself and others! Thanks for being you.
Wow. Who knew there could be so much drama on this beautiful foodie website.
100% respect and admiration for you, Angela.
Do you thang, girl.
*your
Appalled…. speechless and most of all so very disappointed in you angela…..
Oh how you do GLOW! Continue to shine your light. Love.
I came across your wonderful blog a few months ago and your story motivated me to move to a plant-based, mostly whole foods diet. Since then, I have experienced so many positive changes in my health. I’m so grateful for the advice and delicious, creative recipes that you offer here. I also love your cookbook and I was excited to hear that you are working on a second one! Thank you so much for sharing your passion for healthy eating. You are such an inspiration and a positive influence on so many people’s lives! :)
*applauding* Bravo Angela, bravo. I never have understood the vitriol, vegan or not. I love what you do, and it makes mine and my husband’s life much easier. I have bought several OSG cookbooks for gifts for people who want to get more plants in their lives, and you do that so deliciously. Labels are a pain anyway, just be you. We like you like that.
So sorry you received hateful comments. This is something I have definitely been noticing more of on social media and it’s why vegans get such a bad rap. I too have stepped away from the vegan label and it’s been better for me. I don’t have any other vegan friends in real life and you have been the vegan I look up to the most on the internet. Your blog was one of the first ones that I found and it has been my favorite ever since. Everything you say always resonates with me. I am proud of you for not letting these people get to you and for standing up for what you believe in. You should raise your children however you like, and when I have children I will also let them choose what they want to eat. It’s just up to us to lead by example, but not to force anything. Love what you do so much Angela! <3
Haters will always be hatin’
Don’t let the hate dampen your light. You have a gift that so many of us joyfully receive.
So well said and good for you girl. Your grace in handling the situation is humbling. Hateful, shaming people who call themselves vegan are THE biggest hypocrites. I support you no matter what your label is or what you call yourself because frankly, I LOVE YOUR RECIPES and because YOU ARE AWESOME. Focus on that sweet, sweet, BEAUTIFUL baby of yours and enjoy every second!
XO
Angela, I’ve been an avid reader of your blog for about a year. I’m a vegetarian and after finding your blog I’ve made countless recipes of yours that have contributed to me eating even less animal products. I love my vegetarian diet and I’m so thankful for this blog, the stories you share, and the positivity that you send out to all your readers with each post. It is important to have community and Oh She Glows has been my community of like-minded eaters. We may all have slightly different diets, but the support, love and awareness here are what bring us together. Thank you so much for the time that you dedicate to this blog. I have never commented before, but after reading this post I felt compelled to add my voice to the hundreds of others here supporting you. Keep doing what you do and surround yourself in love! I wish you and your family all the best!
Was so sad and demoralized when I saw so many one sided comments here – how can so many people be so crazy to think raising inhumane children is okay???
Then I realized Angela is moderating comments and avoiding the truth.
Facebook which is harder to moderate has actual thought provoking – honest – humane – and rational views about teaching children to love rather that its okay to be hurtful because we have a history of being hurtful……
Actually, I’ve read lots of comments that are along your line of thinking, so I highly doubt Angela is moderating the comments.
I’ve read some of those comments. How is being nasty and judgemental going to teach children about love? How does that honestly help your cause? Attacking a woman who’s trying to do the best for her baby is hardly rational and humane. I believe it’s important to teach children compassion to animals AND human beings.
I thought you said in an earlier comment that you were speechless?
Well said, Carla!
Trisha, seems like you need a bone to chew on !!
♡♥ ANGELA TU ES MAGNIFIQUE !!
With love from Québec, Montréal Canada
BRIGITTE ESTELLE
FYI, not one comment has been deleted from this or my previous post. Cheers!
Geez! I never read the comments so I didn’t know that was happening, but it’s like you’re being food bullied! I’m sorry :( I love your take on fresh foods and plant based nutrition. You see food as nutrition to live, and that also tastes so delicious. I love your blog and will keep reading (and making the recipes!) as long as you write it!
Angela, you met the comments with grace and wisdom. It is inconceivable to me that some people — a minority in the vegan world but significant nonetheless — advocate for an all-or-nothing, binary approach to food choices that make transitioning more difficult for people who would like to reduce their consumption of animal products. From a harm-reduction perspective, isn’t any move toward plant-based diets and away from use of animal products helping the cause for which the commenters advocate? If someone suffers from alcoholism, surely it might be best to abstain from alcohol altogether, but if they are drinking, drinking less is preferable to the “off-the-bandwagon” excessive drinking that such all-or-nothing approaches often prompt. It is also healthier for people who reduce their alcohol consumption to feel accepted and respected by those who do not drink — and it will make the sober lifestyle more appealing. Obviously, this metaphor does not perfectly translate, but the sentiments are similar. Respecting others’ choices, even if we don’t make those choices for ourselves, is integral to compassionate communities.
Not to mention – especially for those of us with eating disorder histories – creating and enforcing hard-and-fast rules about eating can be dangerous (and reinforce a dangerous message to pass on to children).
I am saddened that you had to write this post. It is shocking to me that certain people would attack you and say you’re not vegan enough or not doing enough. What does that even mean? I don’t want you to stop or change what you’re doing. A year ago when I decided to convert to a vegan diet, yours was the first blog I followed and you have helped me down this path. Now, I only cook vegan at home for both myself and my husband. We don’t label ourselves and we will sometimes eat vegetarian when we go out. I am proud of the changes we have made, it’s been better for us and for all living things…you had a huge part in getting us here. I am grateful and can’t wait for your next cookbook!!!!!
I have read your blog for the past few years now and rarely have commented. Just wanted to let you know that I love your blog and recipes. Your cookbook is wondeful and I keep giving copies as gifts as it I think it is great. It is sad there are people out there that would put you down. You have a beautiful and healthy baby and you are doing what is right for you. I also had a baby girl last year and enjoy reading your new baby posts. Keep the great food coming and can’t wait for the next book.
I think what is most notable about your work is your ability to make vegan recipes approachable–whenever I am cooking for am omnivore audience, I rely heavily on ohsheglows recipes. It seems like so much of your inspiration comes from living in an omnivore household–I have always loved that sometimes your measure of success for a recipe is whether your non-vegan husband loved it or not, because so many of us are working with the same yardstick in our own homes and families! There are plenty of vegan recipes that other vegans would love, and my omnivore family would not. I have used your recipes but also your sage advice when presenting food at large family dinners (“win them over with the food,” “answers to typical questions,” etc).
The perspective you gain from being non judgmental and working within your real world family doesn’t make you a worse vegan, it gives you such a great resource to provide practical tools for the rest of us. What you do is so valuable, and highly appreciated. Thank you for staying strong through whatever nastiness the internet has thrown at you. We need you!
well written and from the heart. So sorry to hear that people were hateful or threatening.. If we dont help and support each other we defeat our aim. EVERYONE choses what is right for them, or their child and shoudl’nt have to defend it. I love your blog, your ideas your courage. I am an MD and vegan ( tho prob not to some standards as i eat honey and dont care..) and try to encourage ppl to eat to live, to feel good, to do no harm.
thank you for sharing this. we are supportive of your choices, lifestyle and most of all RECIPES
Wow, I can’t believe that there are people who would take the time out of their day to attack you for a PERSONAL decision. It boggles my mind, but I know it’s becoming more and more common as people can so easily hide behind their computer screens today. I think not labeling your diet is a great idea though, even though the haters may take it as a “win” in some stupid, undeserving way. Sometimes it’s just easier to not pick a side.
I was vegan for 2 years, but made that decision partly because of a dairy sensitivity. I decided to also cut out eggs, just because it seemed logical to try if I was already cutting out meat/dairy. It was almost like a challenge to myself. Even my hubby was on board and stuck it out the whole time! Honestly, I was fine until I got pregnant last year and was getting VERY sick of beans/lentils all day, every day for protein. I decided to start eating eggs again from a family friend with a little backyard hobby farm. I felt a little guilty at first, and people would ask me about my vegan lifestyle and I felt like a traitor admitting that I started eating eggs again so wasn’t technically vegan anymore. I would sometimes splurge and get feta on my salad when out or something as well. But you know what? I decided, WHO CARES? It’s my life, my decision, and if people want to judge then they’re not people I want in my life anyway :) I felt fantastic while vegan, and I still feel fantastic as a vegetarian that eats eggs and the occasional indulgence of cheese. I don’t even judge people who eat MEAT, for crying out loud. It’s not my right. Yeah, it’d be great if the whole world just “got it” and gave up meat, but that’s never going to happen, so why shove my choices down other people’s throats? Good on you for always putting yourself out there, and for making the choice that’s right for you and your family. Keep it up, Ange! You’re awesome, with our without labels :)
I so aspire to be half the woman you ARE and half the mother you ARE Angela!
As my husband and I are gearing up to start a family my parents and in-laws have asked me this very question as well. I always say that I want my children to be as happy and healthy as possible, so if that means the occasional cookie or slice of pizza at a friend or families house that’s fine by me. I just hope that I can set a good example for my children so that they can grow up to be a conscientiousness member of society.
You are so brave to put yourself out there like this Angela, and just know that you’ve touched and inspired a countless number of people! We all love you girl!
Also, even Mahatma Ghandi experimented with eating meat as a child and he was raised in a vegetarian family ;)