I received this message from a reader named Serena and thought it was so powerful I asked her if I could share it with you.
From Serena:
If I have one Universal message for you it is this:
You are loved, supported, valued, cherished, appreciated, honoured, admired and respected. At every moment.
By the Source that holds you in love at every moment.
There is no moment here you have been left, nor could be.
You can do anything. The very best is wanted for you.
You are never alone. You are always loved.
No matter how difficult things seem, you are always being lifted up, even when you feel alone.
No matter how big a leap in life seems, you are greater than the distance you must jump.
You are free. You are able. You are complete.
Lots of love,
Serena
Coincidentally, Serena ended up leaving me this message on ‘one of those days’ when I was feeling pretty crappy and just needed to reframe my perspective. Lately, the anxiety that I’ve struggled with for many years, has started to creep back into my life and I’ve had a difficult time dealing with it on my own. Sometimes it’s anxiety about not feeling good enough or about my body; other times it’s about judgment from others or even feeling alone. If you’ve ever suffered from anxiety, you probably know that it has no limits and it can quickly impact your day to day life. To this day, I strongly believe that my eating disorder was a coping mechanism for my anxiety.
Anxiety usually breeds more anxiety which sucks. I feel more anxiety because I’m not supposed to be struggling with this anymore. I’m supposed to be past this. I’m supposed to be inspiring others. How can I do that when I’m struggling myself?
But I’m only human.
It’s easy to lose sight of the big picture and get bogged down by negative thoughts that loop in our minds, but often, all it takes is a positive message to set those thoughts on the right track again, or even give us hope that we can change. That is what Serena’s message did for me. Her message reminded me that we all struggle and even if we’ve made great progress with things in our lives, sometimes they need more care and attention once and a while.
I receive a lot of emails from other women (and occasionally men) who are struggling with accepting themselves, finding a career they enjoy, ending a bad relationship, illness/injury, or even feeling accepted by their own family. Our struggles may be different on the surface, but what remains true for most of us is that we want to feel love and support from the people that matter to us. That will never change.
And usually that love and support is already there, but we fail to see it. We fail to open ourselves to accept it. We have to be vulnerable to let love into our lives. We have to take risks to make progress.
I’ve always loved quotes. I’ve always loved writing with my heart on my sleeve, knowing that others will connect with words on a screen, in a way that I will never know. I’ve always loved the power that a simple message can have.
Serena’s message inspired me to start working on my struggles with anxiety again. But, I know that I can’t do it alone, so I’ve decided to start seeing a psychologist again to help me with some unresolved issues in my past. I’ve had great success with therapy, and I know I will again. It’s scary though- even for me who has done it before- to open up and make myself vulnerable, but I know that I’ll be just fine. I debated for a while whether I would write this post or not, but I realized that if I didn’t, I would be missing the point.
I’m sharing this with you today in hopes that it connects with you on some level, no matter what you may be dealing with at this very moment. Maybe you got up this morning and the first thing you did was examine your stomach and thighs in the mirror, cringing, while vowing to lose weight. Maybe you struggle with alcoholism, bulimia, abusive relationships, shopping addiction, or perhaps you have the life you dream of and just feel guilty over the thought that something is still missing.
The best thing we can do when we’re struggling is reaching out to another person. The worst thing is to assume that no one cares or will judge us for our struggles.
We are never alone.
~~~
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.”~Ambrose Redmoon
“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” ~M. Scott Peck
“We are all functioning at a small fraction of our capacity to live fully in its total meaning of loving, caring, creating and adventuring. Consequently, the actualizing of our potential can become the most exciting adventure of our lifetime.” – Herbert Ottto
Let's get social! Follow Angela on Instagram @ohsheglows, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest
![IMG_8353[3]](https://ohsheglows.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/IMG_83533_thumb-268x179.jpg "Red for Canada Day")
{ 214 comments… read them below or add one }
Great post, thanks so much for sharing. Nice to know those who suffer from anxiety are not alone, it’s such a struggle to even get through the day when you are in this place.
Love the quote by Herbert Ottto as well ;)
Heidi
I really appreciate your honesty and you sharing your struggles. You’re very brave! I have a lot of anxiety too which I think leads me to have eating issues, as it does with you.
There are no words for how helpful and timely this post is. Every single word of it.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
<3
That is an amazing message. I think I might just print it out and hang it on my wall. It’s very inspiring! :-D
Good for you taking that very important step. I’m a firm believer in therapy and think that, no matter what, it at least helps to talk to a 3rd party about what you’re feeling. Sometimes you even end up talking yourself through things – it just helps us to become more self aware.
I hope you’re able to find the relief you need and deserve :)
Beautiful, heartfelt post, that I think a lot of us can relate to. I have struggled (and still do on a daily basis) with anxiety issues as well. I’ve learned that we need to make an effort to fight the anxiety in hopes of it not ruining our day, etc. It is easy to be sad, worry, angry, etc., but it is a challenge at some points to accept our situations and be happy. With my husband deployed, every day is like that for me, but I try to make it a point to make each day as good as it can be. Cheers!
This post in and of itself is so inspiring, Ange! I have a hard time accepting my own anxiety for the same reason – I sit and blog about how I moved past it, and when those thoughts happen, it’s a double whammy – they suck to begin with, coupled with the fact that I thought I was much stronger than that…but I came to realize – those thoughts don’t indicate strength or weakness; it’s our reaction to those thoughts and our own ability to reroute those messages into something positive that we can grow from. You’re obviously in a much better place than you were in the past, and unfortunately where we are isn’t static (that’s a great thing when we’re feeling down but not so awesome when we feel amazing and would like to cling to the feeling!) but the best part is that we can embrace where we are, what we’re feeling, and react to it in the best way possible.
I am so glad that you posted this. I too suffer from anxiety. It got so bad at the end of April, I felt like I was having a 2 month long panic attack. I thought that everything that I did was going to hurt me. I have never had it this bad. So I finally decided to see a therapist for the first time. She recommended a book called The Feeling Good Handbook. It has helped me figure out the distortions in my thinking. Thank you for the quotes.
You just made my day!
Everything you said just make sense, hope it helps more people to feel loved and supported
Thanks!
Saying hi from Mexico!
Have a nice day everyone!
Thank you so much for sharing this post. It could not have come at a better time for me. I needed to hear those words too.
Angela, I’m so grateful for your transparency. This post resonated with me on so many levels. I have always struggled with anxiety, and I know that it was a huge factor in my disordered eating and thinking habits of the past. I have found myself noticing that anxiety is creeping back into my life as well lately (my husband and I try to soften the weight of it by jokingly referring to it as The Vortex), and am considering what my best plan for processing through it will be in this season.
Anxiety is such a strange thing; it has always felt so elusive to me, like a vapor I can see but can’t really grasp and hold onto, or control… which makes it all the more frustrating to deal with. Perhaps that is why many of us feel the need to make it tangible in some way (like an eating disorder, which we can usually physically observe). Anyway, I’m so glad you chose to share this, as I think it is a very common issue, that still remains senselessly “taboo.” You’ve done your readers (myself obviously included) a great favor by modeling a healthy way of dealing with a reality many of us know all too well.
Those quotes at the end are so apt. I’ll be writing them down :)
Thanks Katie :) I understand about it not being tangible…I often feel like I can’t explain it to others either because it seems to irrational most of the time. Funny, how one can recognize that something is irrational, but still feel the anxiety anyways. I think that is where therapy comes into play.
Wow what a great quote and a thoughtful email from Serena. I think it’s so important to show others that they’re not alone, even when you don’t know if they’re struggling. And it’s just as important to reach out and ask for help and support. It’s really easy to get so wrapped up in your own emotions and fears that you forget that there are so many people in whom you can confide, and so many people who support you. A great reminder that we really aren’t ever alone, but it’s our own alienation that makes us feel alone.
Great Message! I think I will have it printed to pass along to my patients.
I find that certain things appear in our lives right when we need them. I had it happen profoundly a few years ago after a really tough breakup during a time when I found I was uncertain about my path in life. A friend recommended the book “The Saint, The Surfer and The CEO” by Robin Sharma to me. I read it cover to cover, twice over a 2 month period and honestly believe that it help refocus my perspective and gave me more motivation.
Check it out, Robin Sharma writes amazing books.
Thanks I will check it out!
I think I really needed to read this today…
This was a really great post Angela, thank you for sharing, and being so honest. Your quotes are so inspiring…and true! :)
this was a really lovely, raw, and beautiful post. thanks so much for sharing angela. i recently started therapy and i am so happy i did! what a world of difference. good luck :)
oh, angela, THANK YOU for sharing this post today. i so appreciate your honesty in how you’ve been feeling lately.
i just have to share this with you: i tend to get anxious, too. this morning, i really found myself overthinking. all of a sudden, i got the message “you are not alone” strongly and clearly. God was making his presence felt. I even wrote that down on a sticky and it’s here beside my computer. THEN, i check your blog and saw your post. wow.
all the best as you move forward and i commend you for taking the steps you need to take. (hug!)
awww :)
I love you Angela and only want the best for you. Thank you for the post, trusting your readers, and being so open. I am sure you will see your own beauty just like I see it. May God bless you.
I started getting anxiety in college and have continued to deal with it for the past few years. I recently started going to acupuncture which has worked so well at controlling or at least minimizing my anxiety. Not sure if you have ever tried it before but it has helped me a lot!
No I havent tried it, but Ive always wondered about it! Thanks for sharing :)
I would be more than happy to talk to you about the use of natural therapies for anxiety. I have a special interest in mental health, particularly the effects of stress and anxiety. If you ever want to get together please don’t hesitate to contact me.
This is just what I needed to read today- thank you so much for posting. I have been down on myself because I haven’t found a job since graduating in May. I am anxious about my future since it is so unknown, and I am just an anxious person in general. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one.
I’ll join in and say that I am so glad you could share this. I was up late last night talking to my husband about my anxiety and how it affects my family and now you made me feel like I am not alone either! Thank you!
Totally emailing you… like right.this.second.
Thanks for sharing Angela. Wish you the best working through it.
I am touched that you felt you could share this raw honesty with all of us – strangers, really, coming together all because of your beautiful website. Thank you for trusting us. We’re all struggling with something, Angela. You are not alone. This life is hard and filled with lessons that we need to learn. On a lighter note, I LOVE therapy and feel that we all should be in therapy – everyday! Peace to you.
This is a great post Angela ~ it’s so nice to see that we all have the same struggles and it is OKAY to admit it and to seek help. I think that message from Sabrina is amazing — it is nice to be reminded of that regardless of where you are in your life.
Angela,
You are strong, beautiful, creative and inspiring. You have all the tools around you to help you get through this… they are us. You are not alone!
xxoo,
Julie
Wow what a wonderful quote! So powerful and definitely something I can use right now. Good for you for doing something for yourself and being able to recognize when you need some outside help. That is an essential, amazing trait!
Good luck with everything. This post was VERY brave.
My favorite courage quote “Courage does not always roar. sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow”
Thank you so much for sharing. My husband and I have walked through anxiety a few years back so we understand. At church on Sunday our Pastor even shared some of his struggles with depression and anxiety. I love when people that inspire us (like you Angela!) are able to be transparent. I feel like the Bible describes us best “fragile clay pots”. When our pastor read that as part of the sermon Sunday I felt like it was perfect for how I had been feeling. Sorry I don’t know what you believe but this was an amazing message if you have any interest in watching it http://redrockschurch.com/sermon/i-am-second–bethany-hamilton/.
Thank you for sharing this link Alyssa! I have struggled with depression for years, and the way he described having no hope in this message was so transparent. I am still listening to it, but wanted to say thank you :)
Thank you so much for sharing such a great message today. I think we all have a tendency to feel alone – alone in our grief, alone in our body image problems, alone in our relationship struggles. But we can always find someone who has walked that road before us and survived to tell the tale :)
Exactly the post I needed to read this morning. Thanks for the reminder.
Thanks so much for this – I really love Serena’s message and I would like to post it in my house to remind me. I have OCD and GAD — plus two kids that brought on PPD– anxiety (and acronyms apparently!) rules my life. I am glad to know that I am not alone! (and my remedy for difficult days – a long walk puts everything back in focus — plus raises serotonin levels!… and a little ylang ylang on the pillow or in a hot bath). your vegan chocolate cupcakes work too!!
Thank you for wearing your heart on your sleeve because it encourages the rest of us to be more open about what we are feeling and struggling with. I needed to read this today. Negative, self-deprecating and anxious thoughts sneak in so subtly but are SO powerful. I am very thankful that we don’t need to live in the low spots. I’m glad you are taking the step toward therapy. Keep glowing — from the inside out! Your light has a far greater impact than you will ever know!
Thank you so much for this post! It could not have come at a more perfect moment in my life :-)
Sending you hugs and strength! The best thing you can do for yourself, (as you know!) is to talk to someone if you think it will help. Asking for that help is so difficult (took me a very long time to) but you know yourself, so trust yourself in the decision. You are never alone!
Angela,
You help SO many people, including me. This post comes at a perfect time as I’m returning to some insecurities and bad habits from my past. Your courage to write about this and to go back to a counselor is so inspiring and I may have to do the same.
THANK YOU!
Clare
I’m going to keep it simple and just give a big fat AMEN to this. Beautiful post Angela!
I’ve dealt (and still, am dealing) with anxiety from a young age. It’s not an easy thing to get over and it’s very easy to get consumed by it. I also went to therapy (when I was 18 or so) and now when I start getting anxious, I can realize it… and I can see that my thoughts aren’t neccessarily true.
Thanks for writing this post.
Love, love, love this! You are such an inspiration ♥
Hi Angela
Thanks for posting this. I think there are alot of people out there that think that only “crazy” people should be going to therapy or need a counsellor. When, really, emotional and mental health play a HUGE role in your overall health and well-being. Anyone should feel comfortable seeking a counsellor. There is no issue too big or too small.
I hope that this post will encourage others to feel free to ask for help.
Thank you for writing with your heart on your sleeve…today’s blog couldn’t have come at a more perfect time for me.
Something you said really resonated truth with me: “What remains true for most of us is that we want to feel love and support from the people that matter to us. That will never change. And usually that love and support is already there, but we fail to see it.”
I agree whole-heartedly with this, but I also think it’s important to spend time evaluating the quality of our relationships and who we turn to for love and support. Something that can also create an enormous amount of anxiety (atleast speaking from my own experience) is when someone matters so much to us, but we may not matter as much to them. Seeking love from someone who doesn’t quite share the same deep-rooted feelings can only cause one to spiral down the rabbit hole, wondering what personal flaw must be getting in the way and preventing someone from showing us the love and support we are looking for.
Sending lots of positive thoughts your way as you have come to a rocky patch in life – thank you for sharing and for your constant honesty.
Jess that is so very true. Great point!
Thanks Angela! I needed this message this morning.
Have a lovely day!
These wonderful words also come at a great time for me. I am feeling very alone in my pregnancy since I’m so far removed from my family and it has been putting me in quite the funk. Perhaps I should print these words out and think of them daily….
Beautiful post (as always), Angela. Anxiety seems to run in my family. My sister, father, and I both struggle with it (though mine is less severe as theirs). Both of them medicate to relieve the symptoms, but I wish that they’d confront the roots of the problem instead. Putting a band-aid on it won’t help long-term. You should be so proud of yourself for taking this leap. You’re an amazing person and such a role model to others. I’ve even emailed before letting you know how much you’ve positively impacted my life. Thanks for sharing this with us. :)
Hi Angela:
My heart leapt when I started reading your post – timed to compliment right now when I am really trying to overcome a lot of self doubt and fear/anxiety – even more so when you mentioned going to see someone. I just started doing this a few months ago and it’s very helpful. it also takes a lot of courage, so BE PROUD of yourself today! It takes a lot to recognize that need within yourself, and even more so to take action. Thank you for this wonderful and meaningful post.
Also I read it while eating leftover berry and quinoa salad – you’re constantly making a difference even if you don’t know it :) (and yes – it was delicious!!)
I loved reading that. Although I know that I’m never alone, sometimes it’s a good reminder to read it. I can get sooo down sometimes, but reading an inspirational quote, or other struggling bloggers blogs, and most importantly my Bible always helps. God says he will never leave us or foraske us. I know it’s true!! All I gotta do is just cry ou to him. You are beautiful girl…inside and out. I look at you and think “wow”. Keep on shining!!
<3
You are unbelievably courageous to share this. For me personally it is almost scary… were you in my room this morning?!?!? Anxiety is like a wave, it starts small and builds over time to a point where you can’t keep your head above water. For me, I literally feel like I can’t breathe. I started going to therapy last week. like you I have had success with it in the past and know it is a powerful tool. All weekend I was second guessing myself. I felt selfish and weak for not being able to be happier and relax. Your post today is a like a sign that even when you feel unlovable and alone, it is not true. I cannot thank you enough. I wish you all the very best in your work and hope we will be able to breathe a little easier soon. Thank you so much, what you do for your community of followers, it is so important.
Thank you J :)
Hi Angela,
Reading your post and these comments has been a powerful experience for me. Just yesterday I was lying on my coach crying and telling my mom that I think I needed therapy for my emotional eating. I’ve been struggling with it for so long now. Sometimes I succeed at getting out of it’s grips but that never seems to last long. What you said about the fact that just admitting your anxiety is hard for you because you feel like you’re “supposed to be past this” and “supposed to be inspiring others” really resonated with me because that is exactly what I have been telling myself lately. About six months ago I realized that what I really want to do is help people live truly healthy, compassionate, joyful lives, and I’ve been reading so much about self-acceptance and health and happiness that I feel like I should just be getting it right by now. But of course, these things aren’t really achieved, they’re practiced daily.
I just finished reading The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown and I can’t speak highly enough of it. One thing that book has taught me is that the desire I have to do everything right (particularly health wise) is stemming from fear. I’ve only started to tap into what these fears are, but I know in my heart that so many of them are irrational. We want to be strong and perfect and happy and wonderful examples for others and yet, if we really are these things (if that were possible), I think we create a distance between ourselves and those we are trying to help. I think the fact that you are owning up to your struggles is so powerful and empowering, for yourself and for others. As you said, we are not alone. We’re all struggling in one way or another. And everyone’s comments here are further proof of that. I think by seeking therapy and acknowledging that it is more than ok to do so, you are making it even easier for yourself to give help and for others to receive it.
So thank you so much for opening up and sharing this today. I know it has really helped me. You are a wonderful, strong, inspirational person!
Hi Love! I can relate SO SO much to this post – you have no idea :) I am so proud of you for opening up and being so vulunerable, you are helping SO many woman in the process. I live with anxiety as well and it’s defintely something that can easily take over your life if you let – I’m so happy that you recognized it creeping back and are taking the steps to over come it :) Love you girl, and please, please, know that I am always here for you, we are two peas from the same pod :) xoxo
This was totally what I needed to hear today, Angela! I moved to a new city about a month ago and that move combined with the fact that I now work at home has left me feeling quite lonely. I knew going in to it that it takes time to make friends and I love my new home and new city, but I’m still feeling a bit bummed out lately. On that note, do you have any readers in Portland, Me? :) I’m looking for friends/running or workout buddies!
I can empathize with the anxiety plus eating disorder combo. If it makes you feel any better, I’ve always looked at my own anxiety disorder and eating disorder as chronic illnesses. I haven’t had a problem with them in several years because I’m incredibly vigilant about my triggers and identifying behaviors that can lead to serious problems, so that when I’m in need of help, I get it before things get out of control. It also helps me not feel bad if I have a “flare up.” Hope that makes sense.
Thank you for sharing — watching you continue on your journey toward “glowing” is inspiring in and of itself — ups and downs make it real, and help me put some perspective on my own life. I appreciated your writing: “perhaps you have the life you dream of and just feel guilty over the thought that something is still missing.”
Thank you so much for this! Yesterday, I mindlessly ate at a BBQ. I mean I wound up having a lot of chips and I felt like all my hard work these past few months was gone which is silly because it was only one day of bad eating. But I knew the best thing I could do for myself this morning was to make a GM, exercise and just live my life like usual. And honestly I think this way because of everything I’ve seen on your blog. You’re an inspiration everyday and the fact that you struggle with this stuff too just proves that you’re human and I think it actually helps all your readers see that life isn’t about how many times you fall. Its about how you get back up.
Thank you for sharing this, Angela. I have always struggled with anxiety & insomnia, both of which feed off of each other. I’m on vacation from school which should be more relaxing, but I still seem to be finding reasons to be anxious! We’ve had lots of company from out of town and done waaay too much eating out and drinking (in my eyes!), which seems to make everyone else feel good, but it stresses the hell out of me. I really try yo have a healthy outlook in life and “keep things in perspective” but I have been feeling like I’m on the brink of crazy lately.
This is just what I needed to hear this morning, though I know I still have a lot of work to do on myself. Thanks :)
This post is so beautiful. I too am on a journey to feeling the best I possibly can about myself, and some days it’s just so difficult. I can relate about the importance of great wisdom, though, which is why I always find a quote to be my “mantra” for the week. Having it stuck in my head for a few days always gives me that nudge of positive energy when I need it. Meditating on it in yoga is always a great way to clear my mind as well!
Again, thank you so much… this is really inspirational.
I love this… I will be sending this to my boyfriend. He needs a message like this in his life and this is just the right timing. Thank you.
I love. What a powerful message from a reader. When I get home I am printing that out and putting it on my wall!
I was recently diagnosed with Anxiety Disorder and Depression so I know exactly how it is to cope so now my attention is focused on all the good things, its great to shift perspective
Thank you for this…. you help more people than you know.
I wish you all the best.
“We may not like suffering when it visits us, but it serves us so well: it cracks the shell that covers our hearts and empties us of the lies we have clung to about who we are, why we are here and how this remarkable world of ours really functions.” Robin Sharma
“There are no mistakes in life, only lessons. There is no such thing as a negative experience, only opportunities to grow, learn and advance along the road of self-mastery. From struggle comes strength. Even pain can be a wonderful teacher.” Robin Sharma
“Immediately before a great victory, one will often experience a stunning defeat. The key is to maintain your focus and keep on believing. Don’t give up.” Robin Sharma
:) :) ;)
love those!
Thank you for this post. Even though it made me cry, it helped me. I have also recently decided to go back to therapy. I’ve used it a few times in the past and it’s helped me. I’m 20 weeks pregnant and I am slipping into a depression that I can’t get out of. I’ve always heard of postpartum depression but I’ve never heard much about pre-partum depression. I’ve struggled my whole life with disordered eating and body issues. Plus, there are other issues in my life that are bringing me down. I’m 36 years old and I thought I was “better” but it’s been creeping back into my life now for a few weeks and it’s hitting me hard. I think talking it out with someone else will give me better perspective. Thank you for reminding me that I’m not alone.
Thank you for your honesty. I have passed on this passage to several friends.
wow…. that exactly what I needed to hear today. I have been really struggling with trying to lose the weight and get back on track with a healthier life style. I have reached out to my mom to help me, and that was a big step for me. My biggest fear is slipping back into my eating disordered habits which I think is why I am having such a hard time losing the weight.
This was incredibly well timed, so thank you! I will probably re-read it several times today :-)
You are definitely NOT alone, anxiety is also a huge issue for me, and it totally can flare up and totally debilitate your day :-/
This morning started off “craptacular”. The culmination of several snowballing problems. Your reader’s encouragement reminded me that I am in God’s hands, even in the middle of this mess and that He’s brought me through rough times before and He will continue to do so. I can decide who I want to be in the middle of this and how I want to walk through this. THANK YOU!
Your post is so honest and beautiful! Thank you for sharing!
I choose to see a counsellor to deal with stress, fear, relationship issues, career issues etc., it provides a great sounding board. It is so beneficial, it is part of my life, like going to the dentist.
I am feeling exactly the same and have booked myself in for CBT. I do hope you feel better soon x
goodluck :) I love CBT!
You are amazing. Thank you for being so honest and showing us that it is OK to be imperfect. I hope that you are able to get past your current anxieties and feel beautiful again!
Thanks for your honest post. I have dealt with anxiety attacks in my life and counseling really helped. So did this tiny book called “help and hope for your nerves” by an old Aussie lady named Claire Weekes.
Hi Angela,
Thank you so much for this post – it is so inspiring and helpful when you share things like this so honestly with your readers. Anxiety is such a difficult thing to live with, and by turning your experiences with anxiety into a positive output (here on your blog) you have definitely inspired others to not feel alone. Thank you so much for providing a beautiful space here on your blog!
What a beautiful post! :)
I think whether or not people care to admit it, anxiety haunts everyone in some way, shape, or form. Our insecurities are like parasites. They subsist on our own health/well-being, and without treatment (whatever that may be), they grow; they multiply; they strengthen; and they attempt to overtake us. But there is a certain something that every person possesses–the power to overcome any threat and any parasite, to be more than the boundaries that your insecurities create. For some, it is readily accessible. For others, it’s locked deep within. But for everybody, it is there. The power to overcome that which daunts us is universal.
You’re right–we are never alone.
such a beautiful comment :)
Hi Angela,
Thank you so much for sharing this. You are very courageous to open yourself up to all of us who read your posts. All too often I think we’re all guilty of feeling anxiety about things that, in the end, don’t really matter. Most of us are too worried that our “perfect” personas will be ruined if we admitt this so we keep it inside. I think that if more of us were honest with each other, we’d all find that everyone has issues with anxiety from time to time. One thing that helps me whenever I’m feeling anxious, less than perfect (whatever that is), down in the dumps, etc is to write down at least 10 things that I’m grateful for. Once you start listing all the great things in your life, it seems to help to focus on the positive and gets you out of the negative. Anyway, thanks once again for your honesty. I absolutely love reading your blog and cooking your recipes. Thanks for all that you do for us. You are very inspiring!
Angela,
I just wanted to say that I cannot believe how incredibly blessed I am to have found your blog. My own battle with disordered eating has lasted 19 years, starting at the age of 7 when my mom put me on a crash-diet of cottage cheese and pineapple.
At my highest weight I clocked in at 330lbs at the age of 16. The last ten years have been the hardest on my body, my mind, and my spirit. I have managed, through a series of diets and “fasts”, to lose 130 of those pounds, in the unhappiest of ways. I married two years ago, and we are so incredibly happy, but both of us are sick. to. death. of my habits, attitude, and mindset about my body and obsession with calories, control, and emotional eating. I have circled the restrict/binge cycle many, many times. I have lost my mind in a fog of candy bars and milkshakes, only to wake up the next morning and sware off food and excercise out of guilt.
But (I LOVE that there is a BUT!), I have started the long, hard road into healing in my mind, body, and habits. I made the decision to step off the scale for good, and to stop giving myself a calorie alotment every day.
You have inspired me to believe that if someone else has gone through everything that I have gone through, then there is hope for me, however hard earned it may be. I completed my second 5k yesterday morning, and am learning to feel whole and unashamed with where I am.
THANK YOU for writing, and having courage. I look forward to your posts each day, and you continue to inspire and teach me. I appreciate you so much, and one day I guarantee you that I will share my own success story with other women so that they too can find their healing.
-Lindsey Krist
Thanks Lindsey for your comment and kind words. I’m so proud of you and the changes you have made! Im sure your story will be an inspiration to many. :)
wow, what a great message and I need to work on my anxiety too. Something I struggle with from time to time, I worry too much. Need to learn to talk out my problems instead of holding them inside and letting things get to bad.
Thanks for sharing this Angela. I see a therapist (not as much as I used to, but still often enough) and sometimes it makes me feel like I’m weak for doing so — but I know that isn’t the case. Most days I feel really proud of myself for admitting that I need some help dealing with anxiety, stress and depression and I’ve made progress which I attribute to my therapy, so why should I feel weak about that?
I hope you find some relief.
Thank you for being so brave to share what you are going through. It takes a lot to admit the things that we are struggling with and I think we can all use a few words of encouragement and be reminded that we are good enough!! Because we definitely are!
Keep your chin up because you are a beautiful person inside and out.
xx
Thank you for such a great reminder – especially for me this week. Tomorrow will mark 3 years since my dad passed away.
WOW, I really needed this quote today. Thanks so much for the inspiration! It’s easy to forget that I’m never alone.
Angela,
Great post. I think we all can relate. I have come to realize that I never beat anxiety or leave it behind, I just manage it in the best way I can. Your posts, with the beautiful pictures and healthy living, help me to stay positive and focused on making each day as good as possible.
We are more than our anxiety. I wish you the best in finding some peace, and please keep doing what you’re doing, because it helps me a ton :)
-Stephany
This is a great post Angela, thank you so much for sharing. Thanks to Serena too for being your inspiration.
Great post and what a sweet message.
Very inspiring. Thanks for posting :)
Thanks so much for posting this. I too struggle with anxiety and am in recovery currently from anorexia. I know that therapy has helped me so much. If there is one thing that I could share with you that I have learned thus far, it is that anxiety is not to be feared. It is not harmful…the bodily sensations that come along with it will not hurt us. They are TEMPORARY. Always. Once you stop fearing being anxious, you’ve won half the battle. Just try to sit with your anxiety and continue on with your day as normal. This tip from my psychologist has really helped me. I hope it will help you too. :) You will get over this next hump. I feel that times like this help to show us how we don’t want to live, so when we overcome our struggles we can truly appreciate our lives and all the wonders it has to offer. :)
I love that tip…thanks for sharing!
Man! This was the perfect day for me to read this. Exactly how I was thinking after I got on the scale this morning and after losing 60 lbs I have gained 40 of it back! :(
I needed this and today I vow to turn things around. Thanks for yours and Serena’s words. We are all in this together! :)
How *courageous* of you to open up like this, Ange! Good luck with the therapy. I’m sure this post helped many others:)
I have such extreme issues with anxiety that I often feel like no one has any idea of what I go through and how much it takes out of me. But I really enjoyed your honesty and the quotes that you shared. I need to copy them down!
Thank you, Angela, for being real. You ARE inspiring, not because you no longer have anxiety, but because you are facing your issues. I truly love your blog! I am sorry to hear you are struggling, I wish you the very best in coping with things. You can do it!!! And thank you for reminding me that I can too :)
Hey Angela,
I’ve been a creeper on your website for a while, but haven’t commented before. I just wanted you to know that I liked reading your site because you seem so put together, positive, and have a life that I greatly admire. This post made me love your site and connect with you even more because it showed me that even though I’m struggling with things like this in my own life, I can still make changes to get where I want to be. I often find my depression so crippling that I feel I can’t change anything until I feel better, but your post made me think that I could change other things in my life and that may help me more than just attacking the depression. And as a side note, it drives home that I am not the depression, even though I feel so bogged down by it because I’m just as multidimensional as someone like you, it just feels like I can’t get my head above it sometimes. Thank you for posting this.
-Stephanie
Thank you Stephanie! Goodluck with everything!
“Our struggles may be different on the surface, but what remains true for most of us is that we want to feel love and support from the people that matter to us. That will never change.”
That is so profound, beautiful and simply true that it brought tears to my eyes. This entire post is eloquent and moving, and you are an incredible person for sharing it (and for your blog in general, but I’m getting picky here ;) ). I know that in real terms it means nothing, but you have my thoughts and wishes with you, and I’m positive that you’ll find a way to move forward. Take care :) xxx
This is such a beautiful post. I love how honest you are. Your posts have helped my roommate and I so much throughout this year dealing with anxiety about ourselves, our bodies, and life. Thank you so much you are so inspiring!
Angela-that is such a wonderful post. Truly genuine and admirable. I, too, struggle with anxiety/self-esteem and very much appreciate this post! Best of luck into the future with inner happiness!! :)
Such a perfect post. The main reason I visit your blog is because you are not only inspiring, but also relatable, especially in posts like these!
Great post! Exactly what I needed to read today. I am going through some major life changes and though they are mostly positive, the anxiety can be overwhelming at times. I also struggle with forgiving myself for mistakes I have made and ruminate over them. Were all human though and need to give ourselves and others the forgiveness and support we need. You’re so brave to open up with your struggles and helping a lot of others in the process!
Thanks for sharing this, Angela. I envision you as such a warm and kind woman. Full of energy, creativity and love. This energy exudes from each of your posts. It’s so fantastic to see people living out their passion and living in love. Something I see you doing everyday! Or, at least it sounds like you are :)
I think it’s totally natural for us to have those off days. I had an off day last week when one of my coworkers told me to slow down with my marathon training. I took it SO personal – why would she tell me I couldn’t do it? Then, I realized that maybe she was saying she couldn’t do it, and was just reflecting her own feelings on me.
It’s amazing what happens when we remove our anxiety goggles and view the world with loving eyes. Works every time.
I too am challenged with anxiety, panic, and an onslaught of negative thoughts. I created the “positive affirmations project” on my blog a month or so ago to help me; and others, work through the negativity that can sometimes fill our lives. It’s been SO helpful!
Thank you so much for this post. Anxiety really does have a way of cropping up out of nowhere and taking over. Worst houseguest ever. Being able to talk about it in therapy and understand where it comes from has been such a big help in learning how to deal with anxiety. I love that you make your blog feel like a safe place for people to share their thoughts and experiences on what can feel like such a private, isolating experience.
Hi! October last year, after a nightly breakdown, I admitted to myself I had serious troble with eating disorder and started dealing with it. I told my family and frieds, opened up to theit love and acceptance. I started seeing a psychologist and read some really good books which helped me a lot. This June, I felt good and stable enough to have a summer break with my talkning sessions and I feel like I have gained a whole new life. A life that I want to live, alife where I begin to love myself more and feel more acceptance for myself. And during the whole process (and for some time before that), I have read your blog. You have shared so many wonderful stories and thoughtful words and often made me smile, with your words and pictures.
You are really an inspiration and so worthy of all the love in your life. I hope you feel better soon. :)
Angela, you are sooo inspiring! This post really hit home for me today. It was so helpful for me to read this today, and I am having a struggle of my own at the moment, and this was very comforting. As someone who is diagnosed with a panic disorder, I completely feel your pain. You are not alone! Seeing a therapist was magical for me, and helped to *almost* eliminate my panic attacks. I never hesitate to have a chat with my therapist when I need to. Best of luck to you in your journey with this.
Thank you for your honest post. Hope you feel MUCH better soon! All the best.
this post is truly beautiful, it brought a tear to my eye reading it. Angela you are such an inspiration! Thank you so much for your honesty.
Angela, all I can say is “Thank You”!
This post touched me in more ways than one. You have no idea how much I sympathize and understand what you mean, and how good was for me to read this post at this point in my life. So, truly, thank you for writing it, it was the best thing I have read this year!
Ana
Love this, missy. I hope you don’t mind, I read that message to myself, as though it were meant for me. Next to a smile after a hard run, timing is the most precious thing in the world. :)
aww :)
Love this post. Anxiety can be so invasive, but the best way to get rid of fear is to shine a light on it. And your light is shining strong in this post. Thank you, because this really speaks to my experience of late and you reminded me of some important things.
Thank you so much for this post and your honesty, it’s definitely not easy to bare all like that. I wish you all the luck in the world with your therapy and i’m certain that you will overcome this issue! You have such a great support system of love and friendship to help you along the way. Anxiety is something I have always struggled with and it has led to various problems throughout my life. Although it is much more under control now I still find myself worrying and panicking about things in the past, present and future. Most of it is completely irrational but when it gets hold of you it really takes control and affects every aspect of your life. I try to focus on positive thinking everyday and though it’s not always easy, It definitely helps. Sending you lots of light, love and positivity! :)
Thank you so much for this beautiful post-what a great reminder and I SO appreciate how strong you are. It takes great courage to be able to share that much of yourself with us and it really means a lot. Therapy takes a lot, but it also gives a lot-I wish you the best of luck as you tackle your anxiety. You are strong and you are NOT alone!
Thank you so much for this post. I know it can’t have been easy to write. As with so many others, it really resonates and hits home for me. It came right when I seem to be needing it most, and it really struck me how many other people have mentioned the very same thing in their comments. It really just serves to underline your point that no matter how isolated we feel in our anxiety, how we feel like we must be the only one struggling like this when everyone else seems to have everything under control, that we really truly are never alone.
Your post was courageous and inspiring.
We see a beautiful, confident woman on this blog, and for you to share your struggles with us just shows us that you are also strong.
Angela, you will come out of this in a better place. I know you will. Therapy will give you the perspective you need.
Thank you for this. It is so important to be open and honest about anxiety. So many of us suffer from it. I too suffer from anxiety which led to anorexia and eventually depression. I a lot better now and better at fueling my body properly and with whole foods. I still struggle some days with those negative dark thoughts that creep in. But i am able to blow past them after some positive self talk. I keep going back to my pscycologist too because sometimes there comes a point in your life when you need to again and then you are ok for awhile and then back again. There is nothing wrong with that. When you need help you need it. And sometimes family, a spouse or a friend is not enough and you need more than that an objective view.
I just recently got off my anti depressants and struggled with withdrawal. I had major dizzy spells for a few weeks along with mood swings…but i battled through and was open and honest to friends and family about what i was experiencing so they knew it wasn’t against them. I also started to commit to doing more yoga (2 x a week as opposed to once every 2 weeks) more as well as meditation. I downloaded some free guided meditation podcasts and they are great and helping so much. Maybe this will help you as well. There is a lot of good stuff out there and it’s great to take that “me time” and be alone with your mind and clear it of all that crap that swirls around. Anxiety is scary how it just grows and grows and spins and spins. I am trying to learn to control it with breathing and meditation. Funny thing is i just shared about this as well on my blog:) I think it’s so important to be open about anxiety so others know that they aren’t alone. Best of luck. It will get easier and better.
You putting it out there helps so many, including myself. I commend & adore you for it! Sending positive mojo your way :)
Ange,
I just wanted to say, I love you. You’re an incredible woman. Your honesty and generous spirit are such a gift to the world. Thank you.
I would love to plan a long run (perfect for a good chat) and a brunch very soon.
xo
I love reading your blog, but a big part of it is because you make posts like this which are above all else, HONEST about how you really are. So I just wanted to encourage you to continue to be honest, because personally, I only find people inspiring when I know they’re human just like the rest of us. Otherwise it just seems unattainable and unreal. Thanks for sharing, and I’m sure therapy will help when you go into it with such a positive attitude! :)
Again Angela, this is why you are who you are and we LOVE it.
Brave, Real, Passionate, Compassionate, and Hoenst!
Oh and it helps that you are a bad ass baker/chef too. :)
xo
Angela, you are such a strong, amazing, beautiful, intelligent woman. Your strength, poise, class, character, everything you stand for, ALWAYS inspires me. I am once again, impressed by your decision to return to therapy because you believe it will help you AND for having the courage to blog about it…either as a way to keep it real and be honest with readers OR because you think it will help others OR because you think it will be cathartic for you to share openly about it…but both the decision to go and the decision to blog about it…you’re awesome.
I happen to love therapy and think it’s such a huge gift to give oneself. To work on that which is holding us back in some way is a great thing. I hope it proves to be a great vehicle for helping you unlock some things and make the progress you search for.
I am always here for you. :)
What insightful quotes and what beautiful words from Serena.
I think we all appreciates your honesty. It’s natural to feel insecure at one time or another (I know I do). Getting to see someone overcome an obstacle is always an inspiration and always empowering.
Dear Angela,
Thank you so much for putting the message I sent on your blog. As I mentioned to you when you asked me, I am very honoured that you did so, and so happy that it was not only very powerful for you, but that it has also been supportive to others reading today. Your acknowledgment was also the extra push I needed to decide to really share the writings with the images via products and to potentially set up my blog up so thank you!!
We each hold great strength and beauty within us, but the nature of our development means that while we are the essence of deep peace already, as we move further forward, things may simultaneously come up. I feel that they do because they are serving us on the path to a greater experience of that which we already, in essence, Are. It is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength to recognize it and to act upon it. Within each challenge comes also something that will bring ultimately greater joy, harmony and well-being when it is recognized and gained and I know that this will happen for you too. You have inspired so many people already with your blog and in your sharing today you have continued to do so! I know too how much admiration and respect there is also for you in your sharing this. As someone who teaches a lot I know the feeling of sometimes feeling like you should be and feel great all the time, and the concern of something returning that you thought you had dealt with, but I know too how much power there is in feelings of vulnerability as much as in feelings of strength, and how much love and beauty can come from receiving as well as sharing.
I trust that your sessions will be very beneficial for you :) I hope that they will give you an even deeper foundation within of self love and beauty, so that you go from strength to strength, greater height to greater height in all areas you choose. They are almost the platform for the most spectacular flight upwards! You are doing fantastic and will continue to fly! Keeps shining and being you.
In case you ever need a reminder (and I hope this resonates)…
~You are the beauty and truth of love, the wisdom and power of grace, and the strength and source of freedom~
Lots of love and a big hug,
Serena xxx
‘
Angela this was a wonderful post. I too have used therapy to get through a really awful time in my life and it helped me so much. Sometimes it just helps to have another person help you find perspective and discover how strong you are. You are a beautiful person in and out. I believe that you are much stronger than you think you are and I hope you are able to find some peace soon. :)
This post really spoke to me, Angela. Thanks so much for sharing!
This couldn’t have come at a better time for me. Thank you.
Angela,
I have been following your blog for over a year now and this is the first time I have ever posted. I just couldn’t let your post today go. I have read it several times and each time, I tear up. Thank you for your honesty. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for helping me realize that I’m “just human.” Even though we have never met, you have inspired me beyond words. I went from being an overweight mother of of two boys, to a vegetarian, tranformed raw vegan. I physically feel so much better, but still struggle with my place in this world. Your story has challenged me and lifted me up start believing that I am capable of more than I think I am. I truly hope that counseling will assist you and help to provide the peace you deserve. Just by reading all of the comments, I know you have a huge support system. Happy, positive, and loving thoughts…please know how amazing you are and how much of a difference you have made in others lives.
Wow. Once again… you hit the spot. I don’t know how to express what I think in English… other readers probably have done it better.
But you know… you are not alone. For sure. And you are wonderful!
And it’s crazy how this posts happens at just the right moment.
Deciding to go to therapy is one of the greatest gifts you can ever give to yourself, you should stand proud knowing your being proactive. Your so inspiring in more ways than I can say here, but just know that your posts and words are always reaching someone, somewhere in ways that you can’t imagine.
This post was both inspiring and heartbreaking to me. I lost a good friend of mine last week. She was struggling with an eating disorder and depression for some time and last week she gave up her battle. For all the others who are still struggling through and battling emotions and fears in themselves, Keep up the fight. It’s worth it. My world was rocked in so many ways last week and as I still struggle to find closure, I know that the loss of my friend could be a turning point for others. A friend of hers from an eating disorder program made a comment last week that she wouldn’t let the disease get her too. That comment alone was a bright spot amidst all of the darkness. Sometimes just sharing a story can help so many, so thank you for sharing yours with us each day!
I’m sorry to hear about your loss Amanda. My thoughts go out to you. Thanks for your encouraging words!
Angela, please watch this:
http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html
You will LOVE it. It is SO apropos to this post!
Good for you! I have and still do deal with anxiety and like you, I HATE it. I deal with it daily at work and it affects my relationships with my coworkers, and occassionally family and peers. I started using a life coach to help guide me as I felt I was not progressing like I should in life. So far, ok but I know I will need more. My friends have been amazing and a lot of them have gone to speak to someone to cope also. At first I felt strange and thought I was the only one but it was refreshing that I am surrounded by openminded individuals who need a little help in certain areas of life also. Good luck with your anxiety. I hope we both can conquer this.
Thanks for this! I know all too well about anxiety and depression and have also felt it creeping back into my life lately. I try so hard to have people see the “perfect” me. I always try to have a smile and a willing heart. As a young wife and mother I feel like I should be able to do everything, like people won’t have compassion and understanding if I can’t do it all. I constantly do things for others and then fear asking them to do anything for me.
I’ve worked hard over the last year to lose 80lbs, get healthy and feel like I could really enjoy life. I have really enjoyed doing all kinds of special outings with my son (I’m a stay at home mom) and spending time with our dog. Until a month ago I got sick. The doctor never figured out what was wrong. And since then I’ve had several muscle/nerve injuries. It gets pretty depressing when you felt like you were such a physically fit person and all of a sudden BOOM, you can’t exercise (because everything hurts) and you don’t have enough energy to enjoy anything. Its frustrating. Then you have pressure from in-laws and friends to “expand your family” when everyone else is having more children. That’s a tough area for me. Our daughter would have been 1 this week, I miscarried 1.5 years ago. Everything just makes me feel like everyone else is passing me by and I’m stuck going backwards. oh geez, thanks for letting me “talk”. And thanks for being so real with your followers on here!
Just thank you :)
Thank you to you, Angela, and Serena, and every body else who is inspirational.
I would say that I have an eating disorder, and at a very young age. At the age where your eating disorder started. But now, I try to resolve it. I’m not depriving myself anymore, although I would say I binge every now and then (I’m not sure if I do it in purpose though…). But the thing is, I’m changing. I’m living healthier, put in some exercise, and yeah.
It was not until I read your post did I finally realize this. We ARE never alone. Out there, there are thousands of people who suffer from the same disorders, diseases, and crises. And I’m happy to know that I’m not alone. Thank you, again ;)
Thank you and Serena for such a lovely post and message. It rings volumes with me.
Thank you for posting this. I have struggled with anxiety and depression for about 5 years and I was waiting for the day it will all be over and I will no longer have this issue. Your post made me realize that unfortunately that day will not come. It will be something I have to cope with for my entire life and in a way that was very relieving to me. I know now that I need to take it day by day and find what it is that bring me happiness.
I often find blogs put on a happy face and send the message that life is easy and once they have battled their issues, whether it be weight loss, anxiety or anything really, that life is perfect and they haven’t looked back since. That is discouraging for readers because it makes us think that there is something wrong with us if we can’t reach their level of contentment. I look forward to hearing about your journey as I feel like it might help mine :) xoxo
Danielle
Wow I loved this quote Angela: “The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” ~M. Scott Peck.
I find that to be so true because it is when we are being molded, shaped, and broken that we truly grow. Without trimming a rose bush, how can we expect it to grow healthily? I hope you keep going forth in strength and courage Angela! Remember that you don’t have to be perfect to help others…or else, no one in this world would be making a difference :)
What a courageous post Angela – thankyou for sharing it with us :)
ps – I made your butternut mac n cheese last night and it was oh so delicious! http://www.bakebikeblog.com/2011/07/butternut-pumpkin-mac-n-cheese-gluten.html
Thanks SO much for this post! I too struggle with anxiety, and it seems to be resurfacing more now that I’m a new mom of two little ones, working pt. time from home, and sort of feeling out of the flow of my peers but also excited about the possibilities of where I’m at. If only I could silence all the negative ‘what ifs’ that creep into my thoughts. It’s a daily process, I suppose. Once again, your blog connected with me and gave me a boost. You really do amazing work! :)
What a beautiful post! Thanks so much for opening up and sharing with us, your readers. We really appreciate it. It makes me feel like I’m not alone!
i stumbled across your blog by accident about a week ago. I am hooked and your sharing this comes at a time I am going through a similar situation. Thank you for sharing!
It made me cry. Thank you so much for opening up. At times it seems like you’re *always* happy and energetic. And it feels good to know that I’m not the only one struggling with anxiety. I feel sometimes that I have to be always happy and grateful for everything I have in life (especially since I overcame my eating disorder several years ago), yet I woke up this morning feeling out of control in so many aspects of my life and really struggled to put a smile on my face for my husband who deserves to see it every day. Thank you Angela.
As a psychologist-in-training (and a therapy-goer myself), I am so touched that you would disclose that you are starting to see a psychologist. While I am sorry to hear that you are struggling, I am inspired by how your candor may impact your many, many readers. I have no doubt that your honesty will help many, many readers take one step closer towards confronting whatever it is that is causing them distress, all in the pursuit of living a meaningful, value-driven life. I hope you know that what you do and what you write has a huge impact on others, myself included.
Thank you. Thank you so, so much. <3
I love that you are so honest about your struggles. In fact, where you said “I’m supposed to be inspiring others. How can I do that when I’m struggling myself?”… to me, that is one way that you are inspiring- you’re so honest about it… But even when you’re struggling yourself, you have that determination that you’re not going to slip back into those old habits, no matter how easy it would be. That’s incredibly inspiring to me. I know how much easier it is to numb yourself by counting numbers and obsessing over that again, rather than face the powerful emotions that drive us to that obsession… but you’re choosing the more difficult choice – to face and deal with that anxiety and those emotions. And to be honest about your journey. And to show that struggling is normal, and it’s a part of this journey.
You are absolutely amazing. I love that you are so honest and open with your struggles – I think that’s why you are so loved – because people can identify with you! I pray you find peace once again!
I love, love, love your blog Angela. It’s the thing I look forward to most when I turn my computer on each morning.
I’m healing from a long term injury and anxiety plus binge eating slowly crept back into my life for a while. I felt angry at myself for being back there again. I thought I had overcome those struggles years ago.
I think it was just a reminder to take better care of my emotional needs.
This post came at the perfect time. So meaningful and appreciated! thanks :)
Powerful post! Thank you so much for your openness and honesty.
I am so sorry to hear you have been having trouble again, but I am glad you are taking charge of the anxiety daemon, rather than letting it take charge of you!
I never commented on your blog before but this was a great post! I also suffer from anxiety. It makes me feel that I dont enjoy this great life I have to the fullest, which makes me sad and then more anxious. I’ve been in therapy on and off since I graduated college (almost 10 years ago) and have loved it. Good luck! What’s better than an hour ever week or so to talk just about yourself? Its a struggle and it sucks at times, but it is what makes you who you are, so embrace it and learn how to keep yourself while losing the anxiety.
Sometimes I think you are in my head, Angela – I deeply relate to your struggles and my heart goes out to you… To boot, your honesty is beautiful and your openness is refreshing. It is people like YOU, who practice VISIBILITY in their presentations of themselves to the rest of the world that actually change it for the better. Don’t stop, please. You rock. :)
xo
Desi
Thanks for sharing this Angela! My eating disorder, too, was a coping mechanism for anxiety, and every time I feel any anxiety creeping back in I always have to stop and look at what’s going on in my life to make sure I don’t let things spiral out of control again. It’s all about checking in and being honest with myself, I find :) Good for you for sharing this- an honest person will always be more inspiring to me than a “perfect” one!
Have you read The Mood Cure by Julia Ross? A few amino supplements could be all it takes to relieve your anxiety. I read the book and cured my sleep problems and SAD in a week taking 5 HTP.
Thank you!
I love this! Thank you for posting. So uplifting and simple.
Hi Angela! I am a frequent reader from Michigan. I have followed your blog since January and have always wanted to comment about how much I love your blog and how much it has helped me. This just finally seems like the perfect post to do it. I want to let you know how much you and your writing and your recipes have helped me. I struggled with an eating disorder for 6 years and it reigned my life up until a four years ago. The healing process has been long and hard…few steps forward and a couple steps back. Finding your blog in January was a HUGE step forward. To see someone be so raw in their writing and describe in words exactly how I have felt for years comforted me. Your recipes have made me feel strong and healthy and have given me happiness in the kitchen. This post comes at a particularly good moment for me-it was something I definitely needed to hear. I graduated college (I think you guys call it university up there) in May and have lived with my parents for the past two months until I move to North Carolina in two days to start my very first job of my career. Being back at my parents house has put me face to face with a lot of the things that caused my eating disorder and it has been really tough. I have been having a lot of anxiety about my body and exercise and eating and moving to a new state and starting a new job. This post just reminded me to keep working at it. It reminded me to show myself a little compassion. Thank you Angela for writing and posting. Thank you for being a major inspiration in my life!! Thank you.
Thank you Theresa!
Thanks so much for sharing! You’re so inspiring :)
Angela, I wish you the best of luck with therapy again. I can’t recommend therapy enough! It never ever hurts to have someone extra to talk to with no bias at all. I emailed you the other day about birth control but told you of all the healthy things I work on and I always include therapy in that list and I think I said I have been going for 4 years but I just counted and it’s 5 years! I have no intention of stopping either!
Keeping a healthy mind and out look, to me, is no is no different than going for a run or decided to eat the right thing. It helps me feel balanced and in control.
On my blog I share what I learn in therapy openly and recently wondered if that would hurt or help my blog but in the end it really doesn’t matter because with out the help of my psychologist who knows where I would be right now and I choose everyday to get the help I need. I am so glad that you are being open, as you always are, and getting the help you want/need.
:)!
Thank you so much for this post, Angela. It truly made me feel as though I am not alone. Considering I originally came to this site because of a Google search about gardening, I’m in awe of your openness and you have really inspired me. I look forward to your future posts–about food, gardening, or whatever you choose to write about!
awww glad you found the blog too!
You are an amaing woman, an inspiration and a caring soul. Thank you for sharing your story and making yourself vulnerable, for the sake of helping others….That is truly selfless. You encourage the best in me and others every day. xoxo
“I’m supposed to be inspiring others. How can I do that when I’m struggling myself?”
You may not know it but by sharing your troubles, by writing with your heart on your sleeve, you inspire us in ways that no “perfect” person could. These struggles allow us to identify with you, understand you, and calm some of our own fears. Your writing helps to normalize struggles that often seem daunting or unique/strange and allows us readers to say, “Hey…someone this beautiful and happy and successful still struggles with the same things…not because she is pretentious or fake or wanting attention but because she is GENUINE and AUTHENTIC.”
And thats what so many of us keep coming back, day-in-and-day-out.
<3
Thank you for this honesty. I have a million changes coming up in life and it stresses me out greatly. Thank you for reminding me that it will be ok.
Thank you for your wonderful post. It’s been one of those days for me too.
Thank you so much for your honesty and brave post Angela. You’re certainly not alone in your struggles; thank you for reminding the rest of us that we’re not either. Best of luck.
“The worst thing is to assume that no one cares or will judge us for our struggles.”
Exactly what I needed to hear today. I usually visit your blog every day but I’ve been away from it for over a week now. During my own times of struggle, I shun away everything that is good for me (friends, family, online support!). Today I clicked on the link and was reminded of why I keep coming back.
It is hard to open up, but it is so so important. Thanks for the reminder (and inspiration).
Such a beautiful post! It takes a lot of courage to write a post like that, so stay strong and post Serena’s message on your fridge as a reminder of your goals and strength!
PS I LOVE LOVE LOVE your chilled chocolate torte it was perfect for the holiday weekend! Thank you so much
glad you enjoyed it!!
Dear Angela,
I am an avid reader of your blog! I fell upon it one day & have continued to read it religiously. I have been struggling with Anxiety for a couple of years now. I was an Impatient at the Center for Change for awhile & was released a few months ago. You truly are an inspiration to me. I know it’s easy to get caught up in the Anxiety. It feels like it creeps up on you without warning.. but I know if you will stay positive through this time it will only strengthen you. My counselor at the Center for Change is always reminding me that my problem is not a food problem.. It’s so much deeper. It’s a matter of self worth. But the truth is you wont have more friends by being thinner. Your family & husband wont love you more. You wont have a more successful blog. The people in your life who really matter love you for who you are. They don’t care how thin or not thin you are. I hope you know how amazing you are & how great of an example you are to me & to girls everywhere. I know it’s hard right now, but if you will take this as a learning opportunity it will be a blessing in your life. You truly are never alone.
xox Ellen
Thank you Ellen :) Very true words!
Like many of the readers commenting before me I also have struggled with anxiety. Its a horrible horrible vortex that can suck you in and paralyse you.
I was having a rough day and your post made me realise that I am not alone. I hope things start to get better for you, thanks for posting this
What a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for your posts. I relate so much to all of your stories. I hope one day I can get to a point of peace and honesty where I am able to recognize what I really need. I’ve come far but there is so much further I need to go. One brand new day at a time!
connected : )
thank you.
Angela,
So sorry to hear you are going through these struggles. How brave and inspiring to share this on your blog…I am sure you have helped alot of people today just by writing this post.
I hope you find your sessions helpful and a feeling better very soon. Thinking of you.
Hi Angela, thank you for your blog and being so honest with the world. I have anxiety issues as well and as a result my life has been at a standstill for nearly two years. I am trying to get back on track but it is so hard to combat the negative thoughts. Anyway, I only recently discovered your blog and it has been a true gift. I can’t talk to many people about my problems so it helps to hear someone else’s story and know I am not alone. Also, I like reading inspirational quotes and return to your quotes page whenever I am feeling low. I wish you the best with your personal growth and please know that you are both helping and inspring me through your blog. x
Thank you Angela. It’s funny how often the people we believe “have it all” can be suffering from the same (at times crippling) feelings that we are personally. I, too, struggle with anxiety that threatens to cause old habits to resurge and break down my new-but-still-fragile sense of self worth. This is why I still see my psychologist every 6 weeks, to stay on balance, strong, and vigilant against the evil voices that try to plague me.
Thank you for sharing. It’s so wonderful, as you say, to know we’re not alone.
ANGI, it’s because of YOU that I started my brandnew blog that is dedicated to a healthy lifestyle and helps to guide me through the occasional difficult and dark times. http://vanillacocoberry.blogspot.com/
Your story is quite similar to mine and you inspire me everday really. I finally seem to be getting my glow back and I love it so soo much. Cravings really do stop when you are giving your body what it needs. This morning I had a delicious avocado whole wheat bagel and I enjoyed it with my heart and soul and I don’t feel bad about myself.
Thank you so much for your inspirational insightful stories.
Big Hug,
Doris
Thank you!! Checking it out now :)
You have a real gift of reaching out to people when they really need it. Thank you!
One of the amazing components of being an authentic blogger, is that you have the ability to drastically impact the lives of others while you are just sharing a letter that you received. Thank you so much for posting this letter because even though it was directed towards you from the sender, it impacts each and everyone of us. This type of blog post is so real, emotion-filled, and actually drastically improved my day :-) Keep that glow, girly!
Angela, I read this yesterday and can’t stop thinking about you and your journey. When my anxiety attacks spring up inside me I have a few sayings – “open heart and open mind” and “when I start thinking what if I fail, i ask myself what if I succeed.” These may not be for you but they might be helpful.
I’ll keep positive thoughts going your way. I’m not really into blogging or connecting with bloggers but you have helped changed the way I think about myself and food, the least I can do is reach out to you.
Thanks for all your yummy recipes and loving blog.
That was a great post! I have suffered from anxiety probably all my life. It didn’t get worse until April. I was going through a very stressful time at work, home and just in general. I finally had what I called an episode and then the anxiety attacks came. Now I am on medication. I am trying to find ways to help myself but it is so nice to know I am not alone. And neither are you Angela! :)
That was a powerful message, thanks for sharing! Positive thinking is so powerful, but sometimes it is so easy to get bogged down by our own negative voices or events in our lives..
I’m taking a “Living Effectiveley” course at college right now – I thought it would just be an easy summer course but the self anaylsis and quotes in it are SO inspirational and eye opening! I’ve only just started working through the book, but I’ve flipped ahead to the chapters on dealing with stress, and self worth and have even read them aloud to my man as he puts himself down a lot- we need to love ourselves FIRST…then the world will follow :)
It’s brave of you to share and be candid about your anxieties. Be rest assured we all have them, some days more so than others. I have found that on any day that I need a “lift”, all I need to do is pray to God for his strength and guidance and thank him for all his blessings. Works all the time ;-)
Hi Angela,
I’ve commented only a few times before but I read your blog daily. This post resonated with me especially – I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression since I was 16 (I’m now 22), and only stopped therapy this May. I’m happy to say that I’ve reached a place where I feel at peace with myself physically and emotionally, but there are always ups and downs.
My dad used to tell me that happiness is just a state of mind. While I agree, sometimes we lack the strength to clear our minds of negativity. For me, it took years of therapy and antidepressants (taken reluctantly) to gain that strength. You are already such a strong person and I have no doubts that you’ll get through this! Just writing this post proves that you recognize the issue and are determined to get through it.
What an important post, Angela. I have suffered from an anxiety and panic disorder my whole life, at times very severely. You are not alone and I hope you find peace soon.
Thanks for sharing. I am one of your fans, but never written to you. i’ll state the obvious that I love your posts, and from all the newsletters I’ve subscribed, I have a soft borner for yours. You are SO beautiful and SO dedicated and if you didn’t share anything about your struggles, I would be dense enough to assume the grass is always greener on the other side. I don’t have anxiety issues per se, but have experienced them for sometime during different periods in my 29 years. Most importantly, the reason I write to you today, is to say thanks for being so transparent and courageous. I am a vegetarian, and have been a junk food vegetarian during college, I’ve blamed my diet for some of my personal yo yo weight struggles. I am not fit today, but something that I was skeptical about and that helped me is Ayurveda, it helped me as long as I followed it and adopted the principles. In my opinion as a novice in Ayurveda, I recommend you to check out books on Vata body types, and Ayurveda and Anxiety as a certain body type is prone to a certain imbalance (which can be easily corrected.) Dr. John Douillard, who is an expert on the topic in the USA has a lot to say about how Ayurveda can help Anxiety. There are simple things you can do without even taking herbs. Goes without saying, I fully support your step to seek therapy, you must do what you feel is right, naturally. But like a PP suggested accupuncture, I also want to do my part in recommending Ayurveda as an alternative modality if you haven’t already tried it. I have no personal gains, I can simply relate and feel what you are experiencing. Lots of love and good wishes from Dubai, UAE.
thank you angela. I think thats the purpose of certain blog posts. Encouraging others even in the midst of our own struggles. It can be beneficial for all.
I think it has been a little over a month since I’ve been following your blog. By the way I absolutely love your cooking! I’ve tried many of the recipes on your site already and I can’t think of one I haven’t enjoyed.
I was waiting for a post like this to comment on because I can’t tell you how much you’ve inspired me to do something I love. I read through your eating disorder blogs and how you were extremely unhappy in your career. I felt like the same person as I read your story while I was struggling with an eating disorder of my own. I didn’t only gain the freshman 15, I gained the freshman 30. And I’ve been unhappy with my body ever since. I’ve gone on fad diets, starved myself, etc. to lose the weight. You are so right because you really are never happy with the weight you’re at, but you need to love yourself in order to be happy with the body you have. I’ve recently change my eating habits and completely changed the way I think about food. I’ve always loved food, but it was extremely hard for me not to feel guilty every time I ate. I was extremely unhappy this past year with my career choices (and unfortunately I have many people against me on this one… I wish I had all the love and support you have from your family, friends, husband, and all the readers you have).
Now I’m blogging and I can’t tell you how much a writing has always been a part of me, but I never bothered to share it with anyone out of fear that no one would like to read the content I was writing or listen to what I had to say. I quickly realized that writing is therapeutic for me. I don’t need anyone to listen to me to continue to write. I need to write about my experiences and what I’ve been through in order to be okay with myself. I definitely agree with therapy (I have been many times), but when I don’t have the money to go to therapy I write and that’s what has helped me all these years.
This morning I looked at myself in the mirror and was unhappy with my body (as usual). We are only human, but we can find the love and support from others to get through the rough times in our lives.
I am so thankful to have such a wonderful husband and sister in my life who supports me 100%. The next steps in my life are scary because I’m taking a leap of faith and I’m trying something completely different than what I thought I’d be doing for the rest of my life. It takes someone with a lot of courage and passion to go for what they love. I admire you for doing so in your own life and I can only hope to do the same with mine.
You’re not only inspiring… you are a role model for many people and I thank you for everything your blog has brought to my life personally. I don’t think words can begin to describe how you’ve changed and influenced my life already so I’ll just leave you with a big THANK YOU!
Thank you so much for sharing this beautiful comment Jennifer!
I so needed to read this right now. Thank you.
I, too, thought I was ‘better’ but keep finding myself looking in the mirror thinking nasty things about my body. Then I keep thinking ‘when am I going to grow out of this negativity?’… Such a long, slow process.
All the best with your return to the psychologist. You are such an inspiration to so many people and will never be alone.
I admire how honest and open you are, particularly when blogging can be a critical place (not just from others, but from ourselves as well)! That message was beautiful, and so is the energy you bring to your blog. I wish you the best working through your anxieties, and I hope you know that your honesty in communicating here will certainly benefit others. Continue to share your light and that gorgeous joyous smile. :)
Thank you Dreena :)
Angela, thanks for being so honest with us, and motivating at the same time. I’m sure it isn’t easy. Even though we’ve never met, I think of you as a friend, and think that you are a great person. I know you’ll get through this stronger than ever.
Yesterday was a rough day for me, too, so thanks for the inspiration. Warm thoughts your way.
dear angela,
you have NO idea how much i needed to read this post. it’s like you knew my heart when you posted this, but i know you were just being true to your own heart. thank you for stepping out and becoming vulnerable. you have inspired me to have the courage to do the same.
kelsey
I get anxious when my eating issues resurface… I get upset that it’s been over a year that I’ve been working on this ‘problem.’ One quote that helps me is one of yours i think: its a journey not a destination :)
Thank you Angela (and Serena!) for sharing this! I read your blog regularly, but didn’t see this until today. Today (after months of planning, saving and researching) I gave notice to quit my job (which is a horrible fit and has caused years of frustration, anxiety, stress and soul-sucking), so that I may take the time to re-center, focus, and pursue a new degree and new career. It’s a huge change that involves moving, ending a relationship that’s not right for me, and starting all over. This quote blessed me tremendously today, and I will save it (as I too love and collect quotes) as it will surely help get me through the challenging times to come… which are welcomed! (but a little scary at times)
And I just have to say- thank you for this website, for your amazing recipes, for your honesty and openness (which is truely inspiring) and for sharing your beautiful spirit with the world. You reach many, including me, and I am eternally grateful for you, your wisdom, and your spirit. :-) May I gently remind you to continue focusing on the positive, that always helps me in any situation.
Much love and appreciation,
Kellie
Thank you Angela. I was on the brink of making an appointment with someone- but nervous to do it. Then I read your post. Appointment booked.
One of my favourite quotes- and not really a warm snuggly one, but helpful to me anyway:
‘When you are going through hell, keep going.’ Winston Churchill
Enjoy the beautiful day today!
Hi Angela, I didn’t read the other comments but I’d like to share my two cents, hoping that they help you in some way :)
I have battled for years with anxiety, panic attacks and depression; in the past four years I’ve been making huge changes in my lifestyle, worked on my issues and done a lot of healing work. I’m definitely in a much better place than I was before, but sometimes – like you – negative feelings and anxiety come back. My first reaction is to feel frustrated, and wonder why on earth something I worked so hard to overcome is resurfacing…however this is what I noticed and learnt:
– when we start working on healing our Self, it’s like peeling an onion – we have layers upon layers, and although it feels like it’s an old issue resurfacing, I’ve noticed that the intensity is not the same. Even realising so fast that something is wrong and taking action means that you’ve shed many layers.
– we all have ups and downs. That’s how life is, the important thing is to be aware of where we are, and acknowledge that everything is temporary – negativity included!
– be gentle with yourself. Sometimes we just need to slow down and pamper ourselves for a while; when I feel particularly anxious or negative thoughts flood my mind, I try to take the day off, if I can, and either have a nap, read a good book, watch an uplifting movie, play with my cats, do breathing exercises and visualisations, or go for a long walk among trees.
– remember to acknowledge your progress. When I feel anxious, it’s not the same as when I had full blown panic attacks on a daily basis; recognising my progress, my positive changes, help me put things into perspective. It also helps me to recognise old patterns, and take action to prevent them get established again. It’s easy to forget our progresses…but try not to!
Finally, remember that our life is a journey; it flows and it constantly evolves and change. All is well.
Thank you for sharing the poem, it made my day. Have a wonderful weekend :)
Thank you for your honesty. I too have a lot of anxiety. I’ve been thinking about maybe seeing a professional and your openness is helpful. Thanks
Very Inspirational read. I love quotes also, sometimes that’s all it takes to get me thinking the right way – solid wisdom from those who have been there already.
Good for you! I know when my ED was full blast the biggest issues were anxiety (trying to fix it & gain control through something I could control – ie food and exercise) and lack of true love for myself. Even though I have healed so much in this area – I still have those moments too…I think being present and accepting the present go along way towards real self acceptance. ((Hugs!))
I have been suffering myself lately from some old feelings that seem to be reappearing these days. I’ve contemplated therapy (again, like you), but I feel like this time, I need to change and work on myself on my own for a little bit before I head down that path again (and please believe, I will head down it). I really relate to your anxiety and… “Maybe you got up this morning and the first thing you did was examine your stomach and thighs in the mirror, cringing, while vowing to lose weight” was my exact experience this morning. Thanks for sharing and being open Angela since starting my own blog, I understand how daunting the act can be.
We are never alone. There is life all around else, the spirits of the has-been and once-were surround us. The souls of events live on while everything changes. The souls of the will-be are all around too, which we must prepare for. The world is alive not just now but forever. Open your eyes to it, to the feeling of eternity and catching a glimpse of it. The present is the moment, is every moment. It is not a place but a state of being, a foreverness that draws us all together as one collective being experiencing the world and reality.
Angela,
I am SO thankful and appreciative of coming across this post today. I have been battling my eating disorder and anxiety issues for many years now and it has slowly entered my life again; and I let it thinking I was alone day after day. I really needed a wake up call and from this moment on I will remember that I am not the only one suffering. I just want to let you know how you are a huge inspiration to all of us and I praise you for all of your hard work and determination through everything that you deal with on your own. Keep it up and let’s live in the moment!
My dad passed away after a long battle with dementia. I am very alone and I want to thank you for this post.