A Friend In The Mirror

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Well, we got to see a pretty cool sunset last night!

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I asked Eric if I could take him on a date last night…

‘Can I take you on a date tonight?’ *grin*

‘Why do I feel like this is a trick…?’

He knows me too well, my friends….too well.

He reluctantly agreed to go on a run with me, so I threw on my gear and sat at my desk until he was ready. He has been working on renos in the basement this week, so the fact that he agreed to a run was nothing short of a miracle. We didn’t have time to work on the food photography collage, but I will be updating tonight or tomorrow on it!

I pumped myself up by listening to ‘Magic’ by B.o.B- my newest favourite running song!

You have to fake it til you make it, especially for evening runs!

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I really wasn’t that excited, I just pretended I was! Seemed to work.

Did you know that smiling- even when you aren’t happy- increases the release of endorphins in your brain? When you are unhappy, the simple act of smiling can help you feel better!

Before we left it looked like this….

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2 miles into the run it looked like this…

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The sun was a blazin’! I had one of those zen + oohhhhh + ahhhhh moments for a brief 10 seconds as I watched the sunset. It was beautiful. Just as quickly as it came, it was gone and I was back to huffing and puffing and hauling my butt up the crazy hills. I take what I can get.

By the way, I am still LOVING my Pearl Izumi running hat! It is the best hat I have ever run in. It is mesh, so it breathes and I swear it keeps me cooler than my previous hat did.

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The run:

  • Distance: 3 miles
  • Time: 27:01 mins
  • Avg pace: 8:59 min/mile

 

Mile splits:

  • Mile 1: 9:24 (warm-up)
  • Mile 2: 8:56 (pick-up)
  • Mile 3: 8:39 (in the groove)

 

After returning, I made a Post-run Juice. It is an all veggie juice packed with nutrients and just a pinch of sea salt to replenish what was lost during exercise.

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It is sooooo good. Like V8 only much tastier and fresher!

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Athlete’s Vegetable Juice

Ingredients:

  • 3 tomatoes
  • 4-5 romaine lettuce leaves
  • 1/3 English cucumber
  • 1 stalk celery
  • 1/3 of a small beet
  • 2 medium carrots
  • 1 clove garlic (optional)
  • 1 pinch of sea salt

Directions: Juice the vegetables and pour into a large glass. Add a pinch of sea salt and stir well. Serves 1.

This morning I made Raspberry Vegan Overnight Oats!

Unfortunately, raspberries in a banana soft serve are quite sour tasting (at least mine were). I think the only thing that saved this was that my banana was very ripe (hence, sweet) before freezing.

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For the VOO I used: 2 tbsp chia seeds, 1/3 cup oats, 1 cup Almond milk, 1/4 scoop Amazing Grass chocolate powder.

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Deelish!

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Some overflowage, of course!

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The ‘hat’: 1/2 tsp Unsweetened coconut, 1/2 tsp cacao nibs, and 2 raspberries.

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So refreshing on this hot morning!

Eat Pray Love Quote #3

[For the previous two discussions, see the bottom of my quotes page.]

I have another favourite quote from EPL that I wanted to share with you this morning! On page 54, Elizabeth talks about how she spoke with a comforting presence when she was deep in her depression. She would sit on the bathroom floor at 3 in the morning and ask for help or she would scribble her thoughts in a notebook in Rome.

She writes: “This is what I find myself writing to myself on the page: ‘I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long. I will stay with you…There is nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I am stronger than Depression and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me.’

Tonight, this strange interior gesture of friendship- the lending of a hand from me to myself- reminds me of something that happened to me in New York City. I walked into an office building and dashed into the elevator. As I rushed in, I caught an unexpected glimpse of myself in the mirror. In that moment my brain did an odd thing- it fired off this split-second message: ‘Hey! You know her! That’s a friend of yours!” And I actually ran forward toward my own reflection with a smile, ready to welcome that girl whose name I had lost but whose face was so familiar. In a flash instant, of course, I realized my mistake and laughed in embarrassment at my almost doglike confusion over how a mirror works. But for some reason that incident comes to mind again tonight during my sadness in Rome and I find myself writing this comforting reminder at the bottom of the page:

Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend.”

This story in the book and most notably the quote at the end really hit home with me for a few reasons. 

Firstly, that whole embarrassing mirror experience has happened to me (thank goodness I am not the only one!!). I actually remember when it happened to me because I was in university at the time and I considered myself the enemy. I remember seeing ‘a friend’s reflection’ in the window of a store and I had that same gut reaction as Elizabeth did. I remember feeling a sinking feeling when I realized it was ‘just me’ in the reflection and that sense of happiness faded quickly. As I recognized myself, I remember saying something negative about myself almost immediately, when just before, I had seen a beautiful, smiling friend looking at me.

Reading this passage in the book made me sad for that experience that I had, but it also made me happy that I no longer get that sinking feeling when I see my reflection in a window or mirror. I see a friend looking back at me, and for years this wasn’t the case. This only changed when I started treating myself like a friend instead of some annoying pest that was constantly screwing up her life and doing everything imperfectly. Make no mistake, our thoughts define how we perceive the world, including ourselves.

I think this quote is so powerful and I almost did a dance when I read it over: “Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend.” I think this shows that when we leave our negative thoughts out of the picture and let our instincts take over, we will find that we love ourselves and that we see ourselves as a friend. Only when we let the negative thoughts ‘win’ do we start to entertain the thought that we are something else other than a friend.

Some questions today…Do you consider yourself a friend? Can you relate to the experience that Elizabeth had in the mirror? Have you ever had a shift in how you perceive yourself over the years?

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{ 93 comments… read them below or add one }

Faith @ LovelyAsCharged July 21, 2010

I love that you love that song! It’s one of my favorites for sure!

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Laura (B Foxy Fitness) July 21, 2010

What an awe-inspiring sunset!

You always have such deep, thought-provoking questions. Love ‘em! That quote is so powerful…and true. I recently graduated with my Master’s degree and am spending the summer looking for jobs and re-discovering my creativity. It’s crazy how much of myself got suppressed and lost in the day to day hustle over the last two years. I’m re-learning to say the least.

Your quote also reminds me of another by Ralph Waldo Emerson: “We must be our own before we can be another’s.” We must be our own best friend and love ourselves before we can share our true selves with others. When we stop hating ourselves and rid ourselves of negativity we can fully become a whole person.

Beautiful post, thank you for sharing!

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Lessons in Life and Light July 21, 2010

Oh, I love this! It’s been a while since I commented you but I really liked this post so I thought I’d stop by.

I DO consider myself a friend. But, I didn’t always. I went through a very dark time in my life (in fact I blogged about it here: http://lessonsinlifeandlight.wordpress.com/2010/06/15/this-is-the-happy-truth/) back a couple of years ago. And because of it, I pretty much ended up hating myself. I’ve come a long way from who I used to be and am loving who I am turning into. I feel alive again and happy, and it feels SO very good.

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Priscilla July 21, 2010

“This only changed when I started treating myself like a friend instead of some annoying pest that was constantly screwing up her life and doing everything imperfectly. Make no mistake, our thoughts define how we perceive the world, including ourselves.”

I had just finished reading an article on mental imagery when I read your post…and the quote above really caught me, because I absolutely treat myself like that pest, and I was wondering how to stop. I have heard so many bad things about this book, but seeing it through your eyes makes me want to read it immediately. I’ve been reading your blog for about a year and have never commented, but since I took the time to actually copy part of this post and put it on my desktop where I can see it every day to remind myself to stop all this negativity, I thought I should say thank you for your blog and for sharing your story. It’s also lovely to see all these wonderful responses.

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Jolene (www.everydayfoodie.ca) July 21, 2010

I do recognize myself as a friend. It took some time, some growing up and coming into my own. I have grown in confidence as I have moved through my 20s, and now at 27 I feel happy and confident, and like me.

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Kat (Bubble Gum Gym Kat) July 21, 2010

I love the layering parfet idea that you do..makes it looks so much prettier

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Stacey @ Tipping the (Kitchen!) Scales July 21, 2010

It has taken me a while to like who I am and not to think negatively about what I see in the mirror. We have to be kind to ourselves and have respect and pride over who we are. I used to be terribly self-conscious and have no confidence because I always felt as though I wasn’t good enough – like I was a disappointment in some way to everyone I met. However, as I’ve gotten older I realise that the only person I have to make happy is myself, so I’ve tried to stop being so hard on myself and enjoy life. You only live once after all and I do not want to spend that time being miserable!

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Angela @ Eat Spin Run Repeat July 21, 2010

Although I’ve never had super negative thoughts about myself for an extended period of time, I’ve definitely had those days where I’ve looked in the mirror and didn’t like what I saw. Now that I’m getting older, I’m realizing more and more how important it is to be my own best friend. It’s so true when ‘they’ say that if you don’t want to be your own friend, why would anyone else want to?
Thanks for the great quote!

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Michal July 21, 2010

Choosing to go vegan has, in particular, forced a shift in my self-perception. I used to think of myself as the enemy, and being healthy -mentally, physically, emotionally – required me to be this hovering, controlling guardian of my inner self. Going vegan made being healthy effortless and fun, and made me realize I can enjoy being me and direct the path my life follows without being overly forceful against myself.

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AdiFey July 21, 2010

Hey, Hey! Stalker reveal!
I have been following your blog for awhile and I have no idea why I haven’t commented yet! You introduced me to the blog world, and inspired me to start my own.
First off, I HAVE to thank you for helping me in my fight with my eating disorder.
I think I’m going to write size healthy on all of my old jeans I’m trying to fit back into, that’s such an awesome idea!
I will definitely be commenting more often. I Love your blog, and I LOVE u.
And thanks for all the recipes, I’m not vegan but I adore! vegan food so it’s awesome to have that kind of inspiration for meals.
<3
Thanks again, Angela.

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Stefani July 21, 2010

Thank you so much for posting that passage. I reminds me that I need to take the time to be nicer to myself. I am trying to get out of my depression, but I am having such a hard time. I really don’t know how to be nicer to myself, but I think re-reading that quote will help. I know my family would appreciate it because I take my anger at myself out on them which just makes me angrier at myself. It’s a vicious cycle.

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Holly @ Self-love and Running July 21, 2010

I love that quote! I think I need to get that book!

My perception of myself has changed a lot over the years, even recently. That’s pretty much the reason I decided to start a blog. (Your blog is such an inspiration!) Now that my perception has altered, I definitely consider myself a friend!

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Betty July 21, 2010

I just listened to Magig by B.O.B and it is a good running song :) Thanks for sharing.

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Lynne July 21, 2010

Hee hee, this reminds me of the time I went into a shop that I’d never been into before, thinking it was bigger than it was because of the mirror at the back of the shop… I actually said, ‘excuse me’ to myself before I realised that the person I thought was in my way, was actually my own reflection… oh dear! I left the shop chuckling to myself!

Still, at least I was polite to myself, eh?! :)

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Candice @ ChiaSeedMe July 21, 2010

I want to say that I’ve come to the place where I view myself as my own best friend because that is who I want to be. And who I’m striving to be. I can envision being that girl, and I want it! Old habits do die hard, though, and I work diligently every day to become that person. To be kind to myself, love myself and treat myself with respect and admiration.

Every step takes me closer to realizing my potential and throwing myself into that potential full force. And I really think the process is the best part.

Over the past couple of months, yoga has really played a part in helping me to treat myself with respect instead of never being satisfied with who I am. It has helped me to take time to appreciate my body and in turn treat it with dignity and love.

Quitting my job has also been a huge stepping stone in that direction because it was one of the first times that I did something solely based on what I needed to do for myself. It has taken me a long time to realize that doing something for myself isn’t selfish in an negative way!

Great thoughts…and lovely sunset!

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Tracey July 21, 2010

I can definitely relate to this quote and I love the book Eat, Pray, Love. I have dealt with low self-esteem and depression for years now and only recently have I begun to look at myself as a friend instead of an enemy. I still have the negative, critical part of myself come out at times, but I think it can sometimes be a long journey to finding inner peace. It’s nice to know I am not alone and that there is light at the end of the depressed/lonely tunnel.

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Mimi (Damn the Freshman 15) July 21, 2010

Honestly..my world kind of fell apart when I realized I was the only one who could push myself. For achievements, goals, whatever. That’s because I am by far my own worst critic–born from the mentality of “If I’M not hard on you, who will be?”

But that eventually made me realize I could pick myself up too. Yeah, I could mentally smack myself, but I could also soothe myself. Other people bring out my playfulness and some of my better qualities, but I’ve learned to be a lot kinder to myself.

That parfait is like a party. Too bad not a party in my mouth. What would you say is the best fruit to mix into banana soft serve?

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AngelaOSG July 21, 2010

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! :)

Cherries are my fav to mix in :) mmm

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Jenny July 21, 2010

Sadly, I don’t think I’ve had that experience. As I get older, I feel like when I see myself in reflections I think “Who is that? Wait, that’s me? I look so…different”. I have changed a lot, I used to be reclusive and insecure and I have changed. But sometimes there is something so sad about myself when I catch a glimpse in a window or mirror.
I am working on being my friend. I do mini pep talks throughout the day. Just today, I was at work at the kennel. And it is hot and sweaty and no A/C and a lot of labor. And I always say “you can do this, you are strong enough, you are dedicated enough”. I always thought that I was the exception, that I was the ONE person who couldn’t do this or that, and slowly but surely I’ve learned to realize that I can do this and I can do that. And I can kick butt at both.

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Mimi July 21, 2010

That is a beautifully phrased quote. I wish I could say that I always considered myself a friend, but my relationship with myself continues to be up and down. I feel best when I don’t fixate on appearance and appreciate all the amazing things my body can do. I feel best during a good run, a good laugh or good sunset… much like what you experienced tonight.

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carri z. July 21, 2010

i love that quote.

and another one…
that my favorite therapist and mentor
told me years ago in reference
to how great i treated
and took care of everyone else
except myself.

“remember, YOU are the only person you will never lose of leave.”

take care of yourself first.

and now…i do and continue to
do – with kindness and respect.

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Ed July 21, 2010

Have you ever called your VOO toppings a hat before? I like it, super cute! :)

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AngelaOSG July 21, 2010

hahaha no I havent but I think I was thinking about the hats on the patty pan squash from last night!!!

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Ed July 21, 2010

Obviously: delicious food + hats = cute!

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Allie Finch July 21, 2010

This passage really struck me when I read EPL. It’s ridiculously easy to criticize ourselves–& oh how the ego likes to butt in when we try to love ourselves–it’s certainly not as easy to offer unconditional love to “me”. At least for me, this doesn’t come naturally. I’ve been quite self-destructive in the past…never giving myself a break…never giving myself credit…never allowing myself the right to be happy! I would never inject this upon another person, so why myself?! It’s taken time & proactive steps to move away from this behavior, but finally I’ve learned to love myself–that it’s OKAY to love myself!
Every day, the friendship I’ve formed with myself becomes deeper & deeper. As my own best friend, I can lift myself up to living, rather than dig a trench of self doubt…that often leads to depression. I can finally insist [to myself] that I have the right to be happy…& oh how I am ;) I just have to remember to be as kind to myself as I am to others.

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Aurora July 21, 2010

The other night, I dreamed I was making love to myself. I was with another person, but she was ME. It was weird to think about it after I woke up, but now that I’ve read your post, it makes total sense. I have been working so hard on trying to love myself… now my subconscious is giving me the thumbs up too!

Thank you so much.

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Leah July 21, 2010

When I saw the title of this post, that part of the book was the first thing I thought about.
I have had that same feeling when seeing my reflection before, so I knew exactly what she meant. Its a strange feeling.

I’ve definitely started looking at myself differently. For a long time I was my own worst enemy, and thats no way to live.

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AngelaOSG July 21, 2010

That is amazing that you knew what I was referring to from the title!

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Lisa (bakebikeblog) July 21, 2010

Oh my – what a beautiful sunset :) And such a nice way to finish the day :)

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Laura July 21, 2010

Hi Angela,

I just started reading your blog about a month ago I think, and I just love it. It’s ALMOST the blog I want to write, and haven’t started. I think my yoga is your running, and the food part, recipe creation, artfulness with food really resonates with me. What’s holding me back? Who knows, but I relate to some of your posts about changing your life, and the dark moments when it wasn’t quite there yet, so much.

Anyway, that was my favorite quote in the whole book too. The India part made my hair stand up on end and sent shivers up my spine. Italy was fun of course, and Bali didn’t do very much for me unfortunately, but India definitely rocked my world.

I definitely don’t see myself as a “friend” enough. Really must work on that. All the self study, the self care, the yoga, healthy lifestyle…none of these will matter or work at all without kindness and compassion toward myself.

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Kayley July 21, 2010

I know you said your raspberry banana soft serve was kinda tart, but it took everything in me not to start licking the screen! And together with the VOO, it looked to die for!

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Michelle July 21, 2010

I remember reading this in EPL and thinking about learning that the person in the mirror is a friend. So true, and a good reminder that we need talk to ourselves like a friend would when we look in the mirror.

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Rachael July 21, 2010

I consider myself to be a friend, albeit one who can be constructively critical…(and sometimes destructively critical, truth be told).
Patty pan squash are a favorite of mine – cute name, cute veggie!

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Pure2raw twins July 21, 2010

Love the post Angela!!! I am working hard to see myself as a friend. It is hard, because I struggle so much to stay happy. But you have inspired me to look at myself, smile, and say hi friend! I know it will take time to truly love myself, but every step forward is a good thing, right?

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Jackie (Peaces of Earth) July 21, 2010

I’m catching up on all of your posts and I REALLY need to read this book. My roommate read it and kept laughing, crying, and mmhmming. It was quite entertaining. Thank you for sharing all of these quotes and thoughts. I really love that books can cause us to really soul search.

It makes me sad to think about how much I used to be against myself. We are all we have and we would NEVER (well, most of the time) treat others the way we treat ourselves. When I think about it like that, the words I speak to myself seem absolutely ridiculous! So much has changed and I truly cherish the relationship I have with myself now. I am kind and patient and on the days I’m not I forgive myself and move forward.

Love this post!! xoxo

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Stacy (Little Blue Hen) July 22, 2010

Love EPL. I’ve bought copies for several friends but it might be time to re-read it myself.

I had an almost opposite experience but the passage reminds me of it anyway. When my husband and I moved across the country and I didn’t know anyone or have a job, after several months I was becoming depressed. The day I realized that I was tired of hanging out with myself and I didn’t have anywhere else to go was a kick in the pants that I needed to change. Looking in the mirror I saw someone I didn’t recognize because that depressed and unhappy person *wasn’t* me. Now that I’ve taken steps to change those circumstances have helped me be ME again.

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Marathon Bound Gal aka Grace July 22, 2010

I told my hubby about the homemade V8 and he is really excited, his exact words were, “we really need to try that”. He knows how much I love my juicer and the juices I’ve made, per your recipes, so this ones going on the list. Hubby had to stop drinking store bought V8 because of the sodium content and even the low sodium is bad, so this will work for us.

I think the one thing that has really stood out for me as I’ve gotten older, is that I’ve learned to say “NO” and that it’s okay to say “NO”. I am a people pleaser, as my best friend tells me and my sister and I go out of my way to please everyone around me no matter what it takes and sometimes it causes bad negativity on me when I do that. I’ve learned that sometimes people take advantage of that persona. So, yes, I do believe I am a good friend, better friend to myself because of that change. I am stronger as I get older and I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR!!! :0)

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Marissa (Where I Need to Be) July 25, 2010

I love that passage! One of the best pieces of advice I have ever received is to speak to yourself as you would a loved one. It’s something I have to remind myself on a daily basis. After all, the most important relationship we have is the one we have with ourselves.

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Sasha April 24, 2013

What the hell? I came here for a juice recipe but got so much more.

Unfortunately I’m still in the self hate phase, but I’ve loved reading all these posts.

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