Since I announced my pregnancy last year, I’ve been asked quite often whether we would raise our baby vegan. If I saw the question on my blog or social media, I would respond by saying that we decided not to label her diet or lifestyle and I explained why if I had the time. Since I was asked this question so frequently I recently decided to write a blog post on the topic to be transparent about our decision (see: Will you raise your daughter a vegan?). I’ve always been an open book on the blog and figured I could share our thoughts and also ask you to share your own experiences. I enjoy hearing other perspectives because I’ve never been someone who thinks that there is one correct way to do anything. What works for one family might not work for others.
As I expected, there was a wide range of opinions on the topic. Many of you left thought-provoking and respectful comments (whether you agreed or not), and I greatly enjoyed reading them. They led to some wonderful discussions with friends and family this week. However, there were some hateful and threatening comments attacking me, my family, and our decision. According to some, I’m no longer welcome to call myself vegan. This wasn’t entirely surprising; over the past 6 years I’ve often been accused of not being “vegan enough”, being “too mainstream”, or not “doing enough for the vegan movement”, yet here I was receiving hundreds of comments and emails each month from readers telling me my recipes changed their lives, that they were happy to be helping animals, reducing their carbon footprint, and getting healthy even if they weren’t “perfect”. Apparently, my welcoming and non-judgmental approach was indeed the catalyst for major change.
I realize that the scrutiny I’ve faced over the years is from a small percentage of vegans. Tearing each other down is never conducive to furthering the movement though. The majority of vegans I know are incredibly kind and compassionate both to animals and humans alike. However, the personal attacks have made me reflect greatly about whether this label continues to be right for me. Do I want to live my life striving for an elusive perfection that I know I’m too flawed to ever achieve? Or can I do it my way? While some of you will say “don’t let it bother you” and “don’t let them win” I’ll be honest in telling you that experiencing hate on a public forum from your own community wears you down over time. It’s a distraction from my overall purpose and you know what, it sure as hell takes the fun out of the journey.
In the end, I will keep on doing my thing, but without a personal label on my diet or lifestyle. Going forward you can expect to see the same types of crowd-pleasing plant-based recipes on this blog and in my next cookbook; this is how I love to eat and what makes me happy. My goal has always been to encourage others to reduce their animal consumption and embrace more plants in their diet. This is my passion in life not only because of how it has greatly improved my own and those close to me, but for countless other reasons. I still believe that the greatest change happens when we elevate one another, celebrate progress, and of course, share delicious food that challenges the norms of the standard diet. So that’s exactly what I intend to keep doing. There are many ways in which compassionate individuals can spread their message and this is what speaks to my heart. I have no doubt there is something out there for everyone.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me over the years, and also, for reminding me why it’s important to remain authentic even in spite of criticism.
Angela
Please note comments are now closed – May 20/15
Angela, I can only imagine how discouraging it must be, but keep your chin up and keep doing this very important work! You are creating so much GOOD in this world– your recipes are beautiful and delicious and you’re inspiring so many people to eat better. You are a force for positive change in the world.
“Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. Proverbs 29:11” Thank you for being one of the wise ones! I just had my son in Nov of last year and I have seen a mothers wrath when I share how I would raise my son. Anything as simple breast feeding vs. formula or bed times would bring on daunting criticism…and like you I simply learned to just be vague with others on certain things and as long as my family and I are thriving & joyful nothing else matters.
Many blessing to you!
PS. love your blog :)
What a wonderful world it would be if people just lived their lives as they see fit without harming others by word or deed. I’m vegetarian (not vegan) own your inspiring cookbook and follow your blog religiously. Just continue to do what you do so well and let the naysayers have at it. At the end of the day all that really matters is that you’re satisfied and happy with the life you’ve created.
Beautiful post Angela. I was vegan for awhile when I lived in Portland Oregon and you have perfectly verbalized some of the reservations that I had with that community. The harsh judgement and constant pressure to be “vegan enough”. It is so incredibly sad that what is supposed to be a compassionate LIFESTYLE is morphed into a nasty competition by a few vocal members. I too strive for a mostly plant based diet and I believe that the more colorful fruits and veggies that I eat the better that I feel. I also believe that people listen when we raise them up through understanding and empowerment. And through sharing, not forcing, our experiences. You share through your incredible recipes. Yours are my go-to on so many occasions and your dishes are always crowd pleasers. You are doing amazing work that does not have to be labeled or conformed to anyone’s definitions. Eating well is not easy for everyone. Being a mom is also hard at times. Doing these things openly on a public forum must be so challenging. Thank you for doing you. All the love sister.
“I still believe that the greatest change happens when we elevate one another, celebrate progress, and of course, share delicious food that challenges the norms of the standard diet.”
Well said, Angela! Keep inspiring others to live better lives. That’s what matters. :)
I love your recipes. Many have become staples in this almost veggie household. Thank you for helping me reduce my carbon footprint.
Just wanted to jump in and let you know that I so appreciate your tone of acceptance and moderation. As much as the militant vegans don’t want to hear it, the world is NEVER going to be 100% vegan. I think the best we can hope for is that more people will begin to embrace a plant based diet and see that not every meal has to contain an animal product. Who knows- maybe someday there will be many, many people in this world who eat plant based 50% of the time. I think you’ve done so much for bringing veganism (or plant based diets or whatever term you want to use) to a larger audience, and you’ve done much more than the people screaming on these threads about animal murder. Just keep doing you and don’t worry about the haters, there are many of us out here who really appreciate the work you are doing!
I will start off by saying I am not a vegan. There are certain things I love that don’t fit in to the category and I just can’t pull the plug or I should say I don’t want to. This was a very well written piece. I’m glad you addressed it. There is way too much tearing down of one another in every facet of life. Since I’ve become a parent, I would like to think I am less judgmental of other parents than I used to be. I realized quickly that being a parent makes you a hypocrite pretty quickly on things you swore you would never do. I try to do what’s best for my family and make sure if others are talking to me I let them know they have to do what works best for them. It’s sad how women are under so much pressure to be perfect at so many things and we tend to be the worst culprits when it comes to tearing each other down. I’m glad you started this blog and am glad you aren’t letting the rudeness of others stop you from what you love.
Hi Angela,
I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been experiencing such negativity. I’ve always seen your posts as such a positive place. I’ve never put a label on my eating habits for the same backlash. I hate the feeling of judgement I get if I want to put honey in my tea or if I make my husband some eggs for breakfast. I really hope that this doesn’t influence what you post.
As someone who has struggled with an eating disorder, I love to see how your view of food has changed. It gives me hope. Nobody else deserves to say how you should live your life.
Just want to be another person to tell you thank you for being go flexible, non-judgmental, and for not being rigid about labels. Like you said, that is why you’ve had the success you have had! I completely agree with you and support you! :)
Though I’m not vegan, I love your blog and recipes, and I was just telling my friends that I love it precisely BECAUSE you portray veganism as a happy, healthy choice without putting others down.
Thanks for the hard work you put into this blog!
Good for you, Angela! The “extremists” of every movement always take things too far and make it a competition of who’s vegan enough, who’s protesting naked outside of factory farms and throwing flour on Kardashian’s fur coat. However, it all comes down to personal choice and how you choose to approach your decision. You can do it out of empathy of animals and quitely save 200 animals by not consuming them, or you can scream that you’re vegan and push your choice on others.
I always applauded the way you did “vegan” and your blog was the first one I discovered once I started my transition to plant based eating 4 years ago, and I always come back for more recipes with a warm heart.
In my opinion, the good outcome of this backlash is that, now that you won’t have a label, even though I am sure you never felt restricted, but you will feel even more liberated and just free to roam the “plant based world” as you choose! And I’m sure that will only be a bonus for your family and friends :)
Hugs from me and my husband, who are complete fans!
P.S. I’ve made your favourite chili recipe, which is OUR favourite chili recipe for more than 10 times now in the winter months!! As well as many other scrumptious eats from your blog ;)
I am so sorry there are so many negative voices out there. Just know that your fresh perspective on living healthfully is setting a great example! I love your recipes, photos and hearing about your family :) Please keep it up!
Is there an official manual for being vegan? Come to think of it, is there a manual for living life and a manual for the perfect way of eating?? NO! That’s because there is no right way of living or eating! Everyone’s definition is going to be different. No matter what you call yourself or how you live your life, there are going to be lovers and haters. It’s just too bad that in the world we live in, we have to condemn or criticize others for not matching our own definitions.
Angela – you are doing a fantastic job – you are being true to yourself – you are sharing with the whole world your version of vegan cooking and it’s absolutely amazing! I’m not a vegan, I eat meat, and I love your recipes! What you’ve done is take ‘traditional’ recipes and turn them into healthy versions. To all of us who read your blog, we love that! An example is your Raw Chocolate Pudding – it’s a staple in my house and my two toddlers love it! Keep up the great work Angela! Looking forward to your second book!
Can this stop already? “Haters”. Who exactly is hating? Angela benefits from her readers. Most here agree with her. A minority thinks her decision isn’t great. And they have valid reasons for it: it supports animal suffering. That’s not hating. That’s simply being disappointed in someone you really admired. That can happen sometimes. She doesn’t have to accept these comments. It’s her choice to approve these. Should we all just shut up? If it’s all about personal choice why is it then always labeled as “hate” if somebody isn’t on your side?
Thank you for this, and your previous post, for reminding me why I never label my diet/lifestyle. You do you, people will always be critical from their high horses no matter what your stance. For the record, I wholeheartedly agree with what you’ve decided for your baby, and it aligns with the route two of my staunchest vegan friends have chosen for their two littles after much research, and their kids are two of the most compassionate, animal-loving tiny humans you could ever hope to encounter. At any rate, if you ever read this so far down your comment thread, I support you. :)
Thank you so much for this post. I, personally, was so excited when I read your last blog post (and this is from a strict vegan for animal and environmental reasons–not health at all). I found it to be completely open-minded and nonjudgmental and I loved it. Then I saw you post it the blog updated on Facebook and was mortified when I saw the comments. I, likewise, am hesitant to call myself vegan when such judgmental people also associate with the name. As someone in the restaurant biz (vegan baker), in a large city, I can relate completely. It’s so hard to remember the positives when people criticize you when you’re already doing so much for the movement, directly. Even though YOU KNOW that the number of people you’ve influenced to reduce their meat intake (or become vegan completely) is astronomical, and that the people who are criticizing you have probably have only impacted a couple of people, it still hurts to deal with their ill-placed and hypocritical judgements. You are the one making the change, not them. You are the one opening up the world of veganism to people, not them. Whatever you call yourself (I’m not even sure what I call myself, even though I am a strict vegan), you are simply amazing. Everyone I talk to knows who you are and what you do for veganism. That is NO small feat.
Also, I hope it makes things easier knowing that not all animal-ethics vegans would call you “not vegan” for your health-inspired (and of course mental health-inspired) reasons to adopt and encourage plant-based lifestyle. If anything, I’m grateful for it because it opens up the world of veganism to those who might not otherwise look into it! Any reduction of meat is a win, no matter what the inspiration :)
People are dying all over the world from horrible situations and there’s always going to be some privileged person with their head so far up any ideological backside that they’ll criticize what a 6 month old baby (with a health conscious, compassionate choice making mother) is eating or going to eat in a few years. It’s unhealthy in so many ways I can’t even find the words. You just do you, girl. I’ll be here waiting for more recipes.
I LOVE your recipes!! For years I’ve relied on Internet searching for recipes for the produce I have on hand. Some don’t turn out so hot. :( But if I find the recipe on your site, I have no doubts it will be amazing!!!! My husband,also an Eric ;), loves them all!!
I do understand how you feel. Ive been vegetarian for quite a few years. Over the last six months Ive gradually eliminated almost animal products. Yet I cringe every time I hear myself say “I’m vegan” because of how critical people can be. I appreciate how non critical, nonjudgmental, and nonperfectionist your site is. That’s part of the draw! Looking at the comments many of your followers are meat eaters, and rather than being driven off, they’re encouraged and motivated to incorporate MORE plant based food into their diets!! Really, isn’t motivating the masses of ‘average North American diet’ eaters to consume less animal and more plant, accomplishing more good than nitpicking the small population of plant eaters who have already cut 95% of animal products from their life? You’re very brave for putting yourself out there.. And obviously you’ve made an impact on a lot of people… Don’t let a few haters get you down!
I have been reading for many years and wanted to say you helped make the transition to a vegan diet so much easier! When I was new to plant based, about 7 years ago, I stumbled across your site and never left! Your recipes have been served at countless gatherings to numerous people who do not follow plant based diets, each and every time I have received rave reviews (and I’m not even a good cook ;) ). I too have started to shy away from the vegan title because I have received comments over eating honey or having one of my grandma’s special cookies (made with eggs, gasp). I now use plant based or non-dairy veg, or anything but vegan really, to describe my diet. Just wanted to say ignore those who do not agree with your decision on how to feed your child, you know best!!! and you have many more readers who support you than not.
More change will be affected by your accessible, honest and kind approach than any kind of vegan militancy. I have known a few die-hard, vocal vegans, and though they had good-intentions, their manner succeeded only in alienating people from the cause and making them feel guilty for a) not being veggie enough or b) eating animal products in the first place.
I am no longer a vegan, as I found I physically couldn’t sustain it -despite multiple efforts over time- and feel much better with a small amount of animal products in my diet. I would love to continue on a vegan diet, but I must respect my body and its needs too. Everyone is different. I know that, to some, eating animals at all is unfathomable, but each party must be respectful of the others’ opinions. Humans developed eating animals. I don’t believe that we will ever stop, but we can make a deliberate effort to reduce our consumption and support small, local farms who treat their animals with kindness and dignity.
You have inspired so many to be more mindful and conscientious in their food choices, aswell as motivating countless others to vegan and vegetarian. It is a sad, sad world when people allow their judgement to get in the way of what the vegan movement is really about.
Every recipe created by you and reproduced by a reader is a small but impactful step in a positive direction. Frankly, how dare anyone question your decision as a parent about what is right for your beautiful daughter and family. (For the record, I agree wholeheartedly with your stance. It is realistic, and respectful of your daughter. Forbidding your daughter from having an ice-cream cone with her friends on a sunny day is more like to turn her AWAY from veganism than toward it. This way, she can form her own opinions about what is right for her body, mind and the environment. Great work Mom and Dad :) )
Keep doing what you do. I cannot ever tell you how much of an inspiration you’ve been to me since finding your blog almost three years ago. Your honesty is what keeps me coming back (and the food, that’s a given!) and I have many of your older posts about recovery and life bookmarked for those days I need a boost. You’ve become like a friend to me, as bizarre as that may sound! Love X