Since I announced my pregnancy last year, I’ve been asked quite often whether we would raise our baby vegan. If I saw the question on my blog or social media, I would respond by saying that we decided not to label her diet or lifestyle and I explained why if I had the time. Since I was asked this question so frequently I recently decided to write a blog post on the topic to be transparent about our decision (see: Will you raise your daughter a vegan?). I’ve always been an open book on the blog and figured I could share our thoughts and also ask you to share your own experiences. I enjoy hearing other perspectives because I’ve never been someone who thinks that there is one correct way to do anything. What works for one family might not work for others.
As I expected, there was a wide range of opinions on the topic. Many of you left thought-provoking and respectful comments (whether you agreed or not), and I greatly enjoyed reading them. They led to some wonderful discussions with friends and family this week. However, there were some hateful and threatening comments attacking me, my family, and our decision. According to some, I’m no longer welcome to call myself vegan. This wasn’t entirely surprising; over the past 6 years I’ve often been accused of not being “vegan enough”, being “too mainstream”, or not “doing enough for the vegan movement”, yet here I was receiving hundreds of comments and emails each month from readers telling me my recipes changed their lives, that they were happy to be helping animals, reducing their carbon footprint, and getting healthy even if they weren’t “perfect”. Apparently, my welcoming and non-judgmental approach was indeed the catalyst for major change.
I realize that the scrutiny I’ve faced over the years is from a small percentage of vegans. Tearing each other down is never conducive to furthering the movement though. The majority of vegans I know are incredibly kind and compassionate both to animals and humans alike. However, the personal attacks have made me reflect greatly about whether this label continues to be right for me. Do I want to live my life striving for an elusive perfection that I know I’m too flawed to ever achieve? Or can I do it my way? While some of you will say “don’t let it bother you” and “don’t let them win” I’ll be honest in telling you that experiencing hate on a public forum from your own community wears you down over time. It’s a distraction from my overall purpose and you know what, it sure as hell takes the fun out of the journey.
In the end, I will keep on doing my thing, but without a personal label on my diet or lifestyle. Going forward you can expect to see the same types of crowd-pleasing plant-based recipes on this blog and in my next cookbook; this is how I love to eat and what makes me happy. My goal has always been to encourage others to reduce their animal consumption and embrace more plants in their diet. This is my passion in life not only because of how it has greatly improved my own and those close to me, but for countless other reasons. I still believe that the greatest change happens when we elevate one another, celebrate progress, and of course, share delicious food that challenges the norms of the standard diet. So that’s exactly what I intend to keep doing. There are many ways in which compassionate individuals can spread their message and this is what speaks to my heart. I have no doubt there is something out there for everyone.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me over the years, and also, for reminding me why it’s important to remain authentic even in spite of criticism.
Angela
Please note comments are now closed – May 20/15
As a non-vegan who found your blog to expand her number of veggie recipes and to be introduced to a wider variety of dishes than ‘salad’ I applaud you for changing my eating habits and my husbands (who still jumps of joy when he sees a sausage, but at least he now also knows the pleasure of plant based food). I feel bad that your own community is tearing you down, while what you have done exceeds advocating ‘veganism’ by far, you change people lifestyles and eating habits. I see a lot of people pointing out that being vegan is similar to a religion. In my part of the part world, your religion is a private matter, something to experienced or possibly shared but not to be criticised. Since you are paving the way for so many people, I wish they would stop flogging you down and appreciate your contributions.
Hi Angela
I have followed you for years, but rarely comment. It really irks me that people find themselves commenting such negative things on such a positive forum. I respect the fact that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but that in no way gives you an excuse to tear someone down based on their decision. I 100% back your decision to not label Adrianna’s diet, and let her make the decision for herself! You seem like such a wonderful mom, and I am sure your little girl will also appreciate you giving her the choice. Your blog has always been such a positive light, and its really sad to see people trying to diminish that with their negative comments.
Abbey
I also do not maintain an exclusively vegan household, but I am vegan. Your recipes are used frequently because you have overcome what used to be an impossible task, allow vegans and omnivores still make a connection over the same meal. My husband respects and encourages my decision, and your recipes made it possible for us to find that happy compromise. It is impossible to please everyone, but know that you have made a big difference in many families cooking.
There will always be people on the extreme end of opinions and lifestyles, do not let those people crush your spirit. We are all human, and with that, we are all flawed.
And just so you know, I am making your spectacular strawberry oat bars right now!
When we know where we belong, we don’t need a label.
You have 100% support from me!
I adore you and your recipes.
I have not been commenting on your blog until now, but I’ve been visiting weekly for the past year and a half, since I started a more plant based diet. My diet change is a result of IBS, eating disorders and different food intolerances and this blog (and many others, too) has been a big help due to your positive and inspiring thoughts and energy and balanced, easy to follow and sub recipes :) So thank you for your help in achieving a healthier lifestyle and please continue spreading the joy (and amazing food!!)
Much love from Croatia, Europe :)
Hi Angela, I don’t usually comment much on blogs, but I felt like today I had to. I’m not a vegan either. I used to have cereals with (cow)milk in the morning, sandwiches with lots of cheese for lunch and again lots of cheese and cream for diner (I’m a vegetarian). But thanks to your blog I discovered vegan overnight oats, I discovered houmous, cashew cream, cauli-power fettucini alfredo and much more ! I now eat at least 2 vegan meals a day.
I truly believe that by being so open and “not dogmatic” about being a vegan you have conquered millions of people to have a more plant based diet and saved even more animals ! I think that by being kind and patient towards non vegans and vegetarians, we can show them what we believe in. Some people forget how long their own journey was before they went vegan, and seem to want other people to jumper faster at conclusions, and to skip this whole journey. And that’s not fair.
You’re an amazing person, your writing is truly inspiring and I hope you will continue sharing with us.
Lots of love from a loyal reader in Paris
This makes me so sad to hear that people attacked you for being open minded with your daughter. Tolerance of other decisions is what we need more of, and I think your daughter will be a better, more-rounded person due to your approach. Thank you for the beautiful blog post, and for all of your recipes. I am not a vegan, and you have influenced my eating to reduce the meat and explore new ways of cooking. To hell with the nay-sayers!
I have been a reader of your blog from almost day 1. You were the first blog I found, and I continue to enjoy your blog even though you’ve shared less of your personal life over the years (which was admittedly my favourite part!). I hope these comments won’t deter you from posting personal thoughts in the future, but even if they do I will continue to read and make your wonderful recipes.
As for the label, I also discarded the label for the same reasons. I found that no matter what I did; I was never good enough. I couldn’t resolve the cognitive dissonance of calling myself a movement based around compassion that seemed to show so little compassion for human diversity (diversity of thought, in choices, of contexts, etc.). I felt that the vocal minority were letting the perfect become the enemy of possible, and in so doing, damaging the entire movement. So instead of choosing to argue that veganism meant something different to me than it did to the vitriolic perfectionists, I chose to discard the label. It was the most freeing thing I ever did.
I respect the choices you’ve made and all you’ve done for the animals…which is far more than can ever be achieved by posting threatening comments. The animals don’t need threats. They need people to show them that a plant-based life is a vibrant and sustainable one.
Correction: “I couldn’t resolve the cognitive dissonance of calling myself a *member of a* movement based around compassion…”
Your recipes, website and book are loved by so many! Don’t let the haters get you down. Those type of comments and negativity have nothing to do with you – they are just based out of the writers own insecurities or issues within themselves.
How sad that people think it’s okay to be so hurtful…especially people who pride themselves in anti-cruelty ideals. I think your recipes are wonderful and really enjoy reading your blog. Please keep writing!!!
I’d wager to say those jerks are only jealous because they can’t crank out the amazing recipes that you can. Keep on glowing. You have so many readers who absolutely adore you!! For a lot of us, seeing an Oh She Glows email in our inbox is the highlight of our week. My great-aunt was a beautiful woman, inside and out, and she was famous for saying, “Don’t you let them change you, honeygirl. You just stay as sweet as you are.” So please – stay as sweet as you are, because so many people love and support you! <3
Wow, thank you for this post. You’ve courageously done and said what I’ve been afraid to for quite some time. I too used the term ‘vegan’ to describe my diet when I transitioned to a more plant based diet but I’ve seen the kinds of criticism you mentioned happen to many people I follow on Instagram and in the blog-universe. I agree with you 100% in everything youve said and I feel that we should really try being kind to eachother first. I support you 100% in anything and everything you do! You’re a positive encouragement that the world needs more of.
xx Kate
Unfortunately it has become so easy for people to say hateful things through the internet. They have their screens to hide behind and have no real understanding of how their words affect other people. I just wanted to say that I love your food. My husband and I have been plant-based for a few years now and we turn to your recipes a lot for inspiration. They help us stay on track with a healthy lifestyle.
I hope you don’t let the hateful comments get you down. Ultimately only you know what is best for your daughter and as much as everyone will have an opinion the only one that really matters is yours and your husbands.
LOVE your recipes!! I am a private chef and I share your cookbook and blog with my clients who are looking for vegan/vegetarian variety. I have even convinced a few meat-only types to try veg…especially love the portobello fajitas and tex mex casserole.
Ignore the haters.
Dear Angela,
I’ve been following you for one year, and I thank you thank you thank you for sharing your thoughts, work, and love with the rest of us. I understand that taking the scrutiny from even a small group can be horrible, but I want you to know that there are so many of us that share your recipes with each other, buy your books as gifts, and discuss your talent for preparing food in a beautiful way. You are the reason that people love my veggie burgers and so many other foods! Please know that we love you and truly care about you and the health of your family, and we are so thankful for the love that you’ve shared with us.
Please keep going, and we will keep supporting!!
xoxo
Thankyou for your response.
I am mostly vegetarian, but enjoy some animal products occasionally. Stick with organic products from responsible farms and some days I am vegan except for the cream in my coffee. One does not need to be religious about one’s preferances, rather continue toward the goal of good health for one’s self, loved ones, and our earth’s Inhabitants and the earth itself.
You are beautiful inside and out. I echo many of these comments stating that the world is full of people who can hide behind their computers and say what they want. You have served as an inspiration to many and you will continue to do so regardless of your label. I know you have changed my view on a plant based diet and helped bring many wonderful meals to my home and also inspired me to have a vegan pregnancy in the face of many critics. Thank you for your continued honesty and I look forward to the next chapter. Thank you Angela!
How about this ‘I am Angela’…because she’s doing a fantastic job at motivating and inspiring millions of people to eat healthier. Why do we live in a world why people feel they require a label to be or not be something? Isn’t that slightly archaic? The people who live and die by ‘vegan’ can pick and choose the recipies that work best for them and the people who just want great, healthy recipes that happen to not have animal products in them can pick and choose the ones they like best. Angela, just keep being you, please.
Boom! I concur, 100%.
so love your recipes and what you done for yourself, your family and others. Let the haters do their thing…..they don’t define you!
I haven’t had a chance to read many of the responses to this post, but I imagine that they are filled with compassion and respect. Both of which you deserve. I have enjoyed your blog for many years and constantly share your site with others. I have admired how you put so much of yourself into this blog and how truthful and honest you have been.
Labels are hard. Labels create failure – In my opinion. You call yourself one thing and people will look for things that ‘prove’ you to be a liar. It stems more from their own insecurities and self judgement. None of us are perfect – or all of us are perfect in our own way. However you look at it, we are all different. We must make the choices that work best for us. No matter who you are, there will always be someone judging your choice and when it comes to parenting there will always be someone who thinks you should be doing something differently. Don’t let it get you down. For every hater out there you have over a thousand supporters!
I can’t say I’m vegan. I love veganism and what it stands for. But I’m still in a transition phase where I ‘slip’ and consume cheese or eat someone’s birthday cake baked with eggs. I’m still wearing my leather boots and my leather motorcycle jacket – which probably won’t be replaced any time soon due to the expense. As items wear out I replace them with vegan items. I live in a household of meat eaters and milk drinkers! (btw, their consumption of both has been dramatically reduced since I’ve come into their lives!) We all do what we can in this moment. And we do what feels right for us.
Keep doing what you do and just smile at the haters – they have their own issues to work out that really have nothing to do with you.
Thank you for all that you have given to this online community!