Since I announced my pregnancy last year, I’ve been asked quite often whether we would raise our baby vegan. If I saw the question on my blog or social media, I would respond by saying that we decided not to label her diet or lifestyle and I explained why if I had the time. Since I was asked this question so frequently I recently decided to write a blog post on the topic to be transparent about our decision (see: Will you raise your daughter a vegan?). I’ve always been an open book on the blog and figured I could share our thoughts and also ask you to share your own experiences. I enjoy hearing other perspectives because I’ve never been someone who thinks that there is one correct way to do anything. What works for one family might not work for others.
As I expected, there was a wide range of opinions on the topic. Many of you left thought-provoking and respectful comments (whether you agreed or not), and I greatly enjoyed reading them. They led to some wonderful discussions with friends and family this week. However, there were some hateful and threatening comments attacking me, my family, and our decision. According to some, I’m no longer welcome to call myself vegan. This wasn’t entirely surprising; over the past 6 years I’ve often been accused of not being “vegan enough”, being “too mainstream”, or not “doing enough for the vegan movement”, yet here I was receiving hundreds of comments and emails each month from readers telling me my recipes changed their lives, that they were happy to be helping animals, reducing their carbon footprint, and getting healthy even if they weren’t “perfect”. Apparently, my welcoming and non-judgmental approach was indeed the catalyst for major change.
I realize that the scrutiny I’ve faced over the years is from a small percentage of vegans. Tearing each other down is never conducive to furthering the movement though. The majority of vegans I know are incredibly kind and compassionate both to animals and humans alike. However, the personal attacks have made me reflect greatly about whether this label continues to be right for me. Do I want to live my life striving for an elusive perfection that I know I’m too flawed to ever achieve? Or can I do it my way? While some of you will say “don’t let it bother you” and “don’t let them win” I’ll be honest in telling you that experiencing hate on a public forum from your own community wears you down over time. It’s a distraction from my overall purpose and you know what, it sure as hell takes the fun out of the journey.
In the end, I will keep on doing my thing, but without a personal label on my diet or lifestyle. Going forward you can expect to see the same types of crowd-pleasing plant-based recipes on this blog and in my next cookbook; this is how I love to eat and what makes me happy. My goal has always been to encourage others to reduce their animal consumption and embrace more plants in their diet. This is my passion in life not only because of how it has greatly improved my own and those close to me, but for countless other reasons. I still believe that the greatest change happens when we elevate one another, celebrate progress, and of course, share delicious food that challenges the norms of the standard diet. So that’s exactly what I intend to keep doing. There are many ways in which compassionate individuals can spread their message and this is what speaks to my heart. I have no doubt there is something out there for everyone.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me over the years, and also, for reminding me why it’s important to remain authentic even in spite of criticism.
Angela
Please note comments are now closed – May 20/15
Reading the negative comments towards you has really upset me. You have an amazing blog and cookbook that has inspired me to start cooking and experiment in the kitchen. Your recipes are delicious and every time I cook one of your dishes for family and friends they are surprised they are vegan. You have inspired a lot of people and every meal made without meat makes a difference. You have never pushed your views on others and continuously tell people that this is what works for you. I think you are amazing! Love you xoxo
It’s not surprising that some people are reacting with extreme vitriol and aggression – or threats – because they don’t agree with something you wrote. The internet provides a perfect storm of factors (virtual anonymity, lack of accountability, physical distance from the target, and the medium of writing) for this kind of damaging behaviour. Good to see that you’re taking down every single comment that is a personal attack, Angela, because if you don’t, the people making them receive the message that what they’re doing is acceptable human conduct. It is not.
I eat food, not too much, only plants. But in 20+ years of eating only plants, I’ve never self-identified as vegan. Why? Because I’ve come across many vegans who are extraordinarily aggressive, hateful, critical, contemptuous, combative, entrenched in extreme viewpoints, and ill-wishing toward everyone who doesn’t make the same food decisions they do.
Instead, I self-identify as one who eats thoughtfully and healthfully, with optimum nutrition and well-being in mind. It’s an intentionally neutral description.
In my experience, those who are wise never try to convince others that they should follow a particular dietary path or food philosophy to achieve well-being for self, family, animals, or the environment. Instead, they educate, guide, support, and encourage – without judgement or expectation – as to what might work best for each particular individual across various situations and circumstances. Meaningful conversation (considering someone else’s perspective, exploring it, and responding with understanding) about making more thoughtful and nutritious choices allows everyone in the food chain to move in the direction of improved health and food systems.
Luckily, it’s not your responsibility to teach people the right ways to speak to one another. Thank you for staying on course with the wise and excellent conversation you’ve started about how to eat thoughtfully and healthfully, Angela.
Not much else to add, other than I too am sorry you had to go through this. In any group there are extremists. Sadly, that includes vegans.
Angela, I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve received hateful and threatening comments. That’s so unnecessary and not right. You have been such an inspiration for me, even inspiring me to transition from vegetarian to vegan. When I went through an extreme health obsession last year, your blog brought me back to a balanced way of eating. You have done so much good for so many people! It’s awful that “vegans” can spew such uncompassionate words yet still consider themselves vegans. To me, a vegan is someone who is kind to all beings, human or animal. Don’t let them get you down. Myself, my boyfriend and my family all loves your recipes!
Even though I’m only 22, I still find myself enjoying your weekly posts about Adriana. I love your candor and honesty. Hearing how life is with Adriana is so interesting to me! Even if you aren’t raising Adriana as a vegan, I still support you and respect you! Thank you for being such a real and authentic blogger who is truly inspiring! :)
I have been following your blog for a number of years now even though I do not have a vegan diet. Your food is delicious and healthy. I believe that is the reason that you have been so successful. I find your blog to be welcoming and non-judgemental. Thanks for all your inspiration on maintaining a healthy lifestyle!
You are amazing and please keep doing what you are doing. I hate all the bashing that goes on online against various ways of eating–vegan, vegetarian, paleo. Who cares? Do what works best for you and your family. I’m not vegan but love plant based meals. My family has lots of allergies and your recipes have really helped me out. My kids went through your cookbook and bookmarked almost all of it for me to make them.
Very sorry to hear that you had to deal with a hateful bunch of individuals… It is really ironic that people who call themselves vegan would do such a thing to a fellow human. Unfortunately, the reality of life is that there are extremists in every group, and there is definitely a lot of anger out there. Someone below made a great comment that people become overly aggressive and “brave” over the internet, and chances are, they would never say things like that to your face.
As I scroll down, I see how many people support you and how many lives you are changing. I had never left a comment before, but I personally rely greatly on your recipes for myself and my family. You sure as hell have improved my life in many ways. Your baby section is a fantastic source, – and I am only starting to plan for children! Stay strong and kind, as you are. Off I go to look up an overnight oatmeal recipe :)
I actually found your blog by picking up your cookbook in my local bookstore. I want you to know that I have never enjoyed vegan food so much in all my life! I was vegetarian for five years during my teenage years and attended a private college where I was not able to carry on my dietary choice. Unfortunately I went back to eating meat, although very little red meat. I’ve had a lot of food sensitivities and have struggled with my health for the last several years. Pregnancy did a real number on my health. Long story short, I’ve been suspecting for the longest time that I needed to return to my choice of eating a mostly vegan/vegetarian diet. Yes I tried stints of it in the last 10 years but it never stuck. I’m thrilled to say that your cookbook has inspired me to head down that path again! In a few short weeks I’m enjoying so much more energy! I have never enjoyed a cookbook so much! I’ve tried so many recipes and I’m looking forward to trying more! You make vegan food so accessible for the budget and so delicious, and your blog is very inviting and beautiful. Keep being who you are, you have a lot to give, and you’ve inspired a lot of people to live a healthier life! I completely support you in your choice for your daughter. Everyone is made differently. We have two veggies and three meat-eaters in our family and I completely respect the diversity that is needed in order for our family to be healthy. You’re making a very wise decision with your daughter! Thank you again for your delicious recipes!
Love you Angela! You are a huge inspiration to me. Not just for the beautiful and inspiring blog you created, but also for the way you live your life. Authentic, full of courage and passion. I am so so sorry this happened to you and can only imagine the effect this has on you. Please know there is a huge bundle of love out there from all of us who love and support you.
Angela,
I am incredibly sorry that you received any rude comments from vegans. As a vegan myself, I understand the importance of educating each other through a light-hearted way, and the pushy ones ruin it for us all and give us a bad reputation. You are doing AMAZING and you are a BEAUTIFUL woman inside and out. Thank you for all you do for your followers.
I found your blog a couple of years ago, and it was the first time I ever considered that I could follow a vegan diet.
I’m sad that you’ve received such angry comments, because without you and your amazing work, this world would have far fewer vegans in it.
Thank you a million times x
Stay strong! Sorry there are haters. I hope you feel all the love from those (me included) you have helped and encouraged with your blog and cookbook.
Angela, this post couldn’t have come at a more perfect time for me. I’ve been doing my level best for the past 3.5 years to stick to my vegan diet. I make choices based on what I hope is a well rounded moral compass. Today I felt thoroughly attacked by a member of the vegan community who accused me of being ignorant and patronising. I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing. I fully understand your decision to no longer label yourself. It is a shame though that some of us feel the need to disentangle ourselves from a group whom we previously believed to be “fighting the good fight”. I am a huge fan of your work, your recipes have delighted everyone I have served them to, whatever their lifestyle choices. I think perhaps the people that go on the verbal attack would find something else to vent their anger about if it wasn’t veganism.
Not even sure what people could possible criticize.. ?? I’m sorry though, for the hurt those comments caused you. I can’t imagine the courage and internal fortitude it must take to live such a public life and subject yourself to the comments of the crazy, cowardly, mean-spirited individuals who lurk on the internet. Be strong, shake it off, and be true to yourself and just focus on your beautiful daughter, your husband and your own well-being.
We also love your blog and cookbook. Your recipes are eaten weekly and on holidays!! We are not strict vegan. We do our best to eat cruelty free. We hope you continue your blog and all the amazing recipes. You can’t make everyone happy and some people were not taught MANNERS. They really do matter!! So of they don’t have anything nice to say they should not say it. Have a beautiful day!!
I completely agree with your comments and concerns that you are not vegan enough. I eat a PlantBased diet I no longer say I am vegan because some people get all crazy on you because you don’t eat “Organic” 24/7 or that my clothes do not come from an ethically sourced place. I do what I can as much as I can. I have chosen to eat this way for the last 4 years for my health and other things have followed. I try as much as I can to bring wonderful dishes to family gatherings so others can realize you can have great food minus the animal ingredients but for all the Blogs I follow they have all expressed the same concern “Not being vegan enough” . When is enough-enough. As Happy Herbivore says “Practice not Perfection”. You have to do what’s right for you and your family. Raising you children on fast food and junk food is not healthy but Millions of people do it everyday without criticism from their neighbors because in our society this is normal, but feed your children veggies and whole grains you must be abusing them by not giving them a well balanced diet. One day the views will change and hopefully sooner then later for the sake of our environment. I can only do what’s right for me and my husband. I am the only one who eats this way in a very large Italian family. My husband is more then happy to eat whatever I make at home but will eat what is served when when go to friends and families homes. Even after all this time family does not understand my food choses. So I ignore their comments and do what is right for me and my health. I enjoy you blog and look forward to your next cookbook. Your first was fantastic. Thank you for your time.
You are a fresh voice of reason and have incredible insight. Keeo up the great work and we love your recipes and all the love and positivity you bring to the world.
Hi Angela, I don’t quite know how to articulate how upset I am at how judgemental and cruel some people can be. I want you to know that you have had such a positive impact on my life and the lives of those around me. You’ve taught me to not only love food, but to love myself- and for that I thank you. Keep doing what you’re doing :) x
i’m sorry to hear about those offensive comments. What I always loved about your approach is that you were never preachy or tried to convince people that vegan is better. I am not vegan and probably never will be but I still enjoy a healthy lifestyle and I thank you for creating recipes that make healthy food tast great! I look forward to your next cookbook!
I’ve been a blog follower for at least a year and love your site and your recipes and your cookbook. You are a class act and responded so well to those who were mean and hateful. People who respond that way, that there is only one way, their way, to eat and to live, make others not want to be vegans. I don’t want to be associated with people like that. I am working on transitioning to a plant based diet and I want you to know you’ve made a huge impact in my life. I appreciate all you do. Thank you so much. Looking forward to continue following you online with all of the wonderful recipes you come up with and with your new book when it comes out. And also hearing about your adventures with Adriana and Eric. And Sketchie. You go girl!