The Unspoken Issue

by Angela (Oh She Glows) on February 4, 2009

Hey everyone!

Thank you all so much for your comments on this afternoon’s post! I really love the support on this website! So amazing, each and every one of you. I always walk away feeling uplifted after I read all of your comments and emails.

And it is my only hope that I can do the same in return!

So tonight I thought I would address an issue that I have been getting lots of questions about since I wrote about my past struggles with binges.

Yes, the B word. The often unspoken issue that millions of people struggle with every day.

Binge eating.

Like other eating disorders, there are varying degrees of binge eating. For some it is extreme in the amount of calories that are consumed as well as the debilitating effect it has on their life. For others, it is a pesky problem that causes emotional upset but does not severely impact their life.

At any rate, binge eating leaves its sufferers shameful and guilt ridden.

I was talking to a fellow reader of Oh She Glows, and I admitted to her that I had some anxiety over disclosing the fact that I had struggle with binges at times in my past. I think that is because binge eating, along with bulimia (which I have never suffered from), have a huge amount of shame associated with them. This makes it hard for women to reach out and seek help from others.

Here are just a few of the emails that I have received on binge eating:

“I feel like I may be going through some of the same stuff that you did and others who read your blog currently are. For the most part, I eat very healthfully. I don’t know what the problem is…I exercise everyday (sometimes I take a day off), I follow a healthy diet (oatmeal for breakfast, fruit mid-morning, lunch of salad/sandwich, yogurt, veggies, granola bar or something for afternoon snack, healthy dinner of chicken or fish or veggie “stir fry”, brown rice, you know the deal. I usually have a “dessert” too-Kashi Go Lean Crunch with raisins or yogurt, nuts, peanut butter on a slice of bread–something like that. Sometimes though, I find myself overeating. I have never had a weight problem. I’m thin (would like to be a bit more toned!) but sometimes I feel like I just go on these binges for no reason. Sometimes I am hungry, but what I eat ends up being excessive. Often, during the binge, I realize I’m doing it but don’t stop. I’ve been better about that type of binge lately and don’t really do that anymore. I feel like the latest thing is secretive eating. I will wait until I’m alone until I prepare snacks or eat them. This has been especially problematic when I’m at my boyfriend’s house.  His mom keeps the cabinets/fridge STOCKED with loads of food (some healthy, some not). I don’t like sneaking around and was wondering if you have any advice for this? I feel like I eat enough, but maybe my body is feeling deprived? I don’t know. I just try to eat healthfully and naturally (whole foods). I really want to resolve this issue though.

Sorry for the long email, just hoping maybe you could relate!”


“How did you stop the binging? I know that my issue is that I don’t seem to be balancing my meals (also feel deprived) and may be over exercising then I over eat, over exercise, etc.”


“Hi Angela!

You said in your blog tonight to email if we need to vent! So…here goes:

I’m trying VERY hard to overcome binge eating. I know you said you’ve dealt with that in the past. I know this is something that a lot of women deal with. Is there anyway that you could put a blog up about overcoming binge eating, how you did it, tips, etc….I think that would be super helpful. I know I’d appreciate it. I think this is an “unspoken” issue that is far more prevalent that we all realize.

Keep up the great work!”


Please note that I withheld names from the emails, not because I think these comments should be hidden, but because I am not at liberty to judge what amount of disclosure others are ready for at this point.

All of these are wonderful and honest questions and I appreciate that.

The experience I have had with binges are that they usually stem from one or more things:

1) A mental deprivation

2) A physical deprivation

3) Stress

4) Habit

5) A combination of the above

An example of a mental deprivation would be feeling like you are denying yourself foods that you are craving, even though your diet may be 100% healthy.

As in the case with comment #1, it sort of sounds like the commenter has a very healthy diet, however I question whether she is truly allowing herself some indulgences that she craves now and then. Of course, I have no idea and so this makes it hard to answer these questions, but I can of course give my own experience here.

From my experience, when I have had what seemed like a perfect & healthy diet, I still struggled with binges and over eating. My indulgence was some fruit after dinner or something fairly safe, however what I may have wanted was just a chocolate bar! I felt mentally deprived because I wanted something a bit exciting and off the beaten track now and then and my healthy diet, while balanced, did not give me this. So even if you are eating enough calories and the right food groups, sometimes your mind just wants a little fun. And for me, when I didn’t give it that once and a while, binges and over eating would happen. Only you can be the judge of what is a good balance for yourself, but if you are indeed experiencing binges then something is not working.

An example of a physical deprivation would be that your body is literally lacking certain nutrients in your diet and is making you binge to try and get these nutrients.

For example, if someone with an eating disorder is calcium deprived, they may find themselves binging on cartons of ice cream and not know why.

In this case, it is very important to assess whether your diet is giving you the right nutrients that it needs to function properly.

I highly recommend seeing a Registered Dietitian for an assessment if you think you may be lacking nutrients. I saw one during university and it was one of the best things I ever did!

An example of stress binging is fairly obvious. This is the time when you are going through a chronic (a family member is ill) or acute (You failed an exam) stressor in your life. Your body is cranking out adrenaline and cortisol. Cortisol increases your appetite for fatty and sugary foods. If you are depressed, your body will also use the food as a way to temporarily increase the endorphins in your brain.

Yes, food gives you endorphins- it is an evolutionary function so that humans desire to eat and find eating pleasurable. In fact, many of the ‘feel good’ human experiences (e.g., eating, drinking, sex, love) are adaptive because if they weren’t pleasurable we would all die out and have no interest in them.

So eating makes you feel good. We know that, the thing we have to do is figure out other adaptive ways to make ourselves feel good and to increase the endorphins in our brains.

Stay tuned for part 2 on strategies that helped me overcome overeating as well as breaking the habit.


Tonight’s quote comes straight from a graffiti wall in Istanbul, Turkey

It reads:

Don’t be afraid of Art.

Don’t be afraid your mind.


See you tomorrow morning for a sad mail delivery and what home renos Eric and I are working on!

Night! :D

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

danser81 February 4, 2009 at 10:06 pm

I love your inspirational posts everyday! They are so uplifting!



Melinda February 4, 2009 at 11:17 pm

THANK YOU for posting this. I still struggle with this– the first email you posted is DEAD ON what I experience too. I’ve definitely cut back, but still, it happens from time to time. I can’t wait to read the continuation, you rock!!


Christy February 5, 2009 at 12:34 am

Thank you so much for the insightful post. I know this will help many people feel less ashamed and give them a starting point toward introspection over their own binges. Keep up the great work!


Leah February 5, 2009 at 2:46 am

As always, great post- something which you know I can relate to. A whole lot of awesomeness for both of us overcoming it!


emlod10 February 5, 2009 at 8:30 am

Thank you so much for posting about this. It really is something nobody likes to talk about. I was reading your “Road to Health” yesterday as i recently found your blog and was going to e-mail you regarding this subject. Thank you for taking time to research and write about this in such a manner that does not discourage people!

Hope you have a great day!


Elina February 5, 2009 at 12:56 pm

Thank you for this post! I definitely suffer from binge eating – some weeks more than others. This week has been great! I’ve been super motivated to eat healthy so there has been no problems. My problem is usually mindless snacking (like eating trail mix straight out of a huge bag) that then turns into bingeing. Not good. I also try to allow myself a real treat once a week. Which reminds me… I really should have one soon :) If I go too long without one, even if I think I don’t “need it” bad things happen. Anyways, thanks again for this post and I’m looking forward to part 2!


Jaime February 6, 2009 at 4:18 pm

I enjoyed your post. Just wanted anyone reading this that is struggling to check out this ministry:

Mercy Ministries was founded by Nancy Alcorn in 1983. It is a non-profit residential counseling program that exists to transform the lives of young women between the ages of 13-28 who face life-controlling issues. The program is free of charge, which is pretty amazing. I want to spread the awareness about Mercy because these problems are all too real in today’s society!

Take Care!


Emily September 18, 2009 at 7:16 pm

It was as if I had written this myself! Thank you for talking about this issue. I no longer binge eat, but I did in the past and it was definitely due to the combination of reasons you noted. I am so happy to be balanced and free from the restraints of strict dieting!! I just love your blog!!

P.S. You’ll be disappointed to hear this, but I am still a green moster virgin. Maybe one day soon…


olivia March 6, 2013 at 12:49 pm

I just wanted to say – like all of the 10000s of other readers out there – how inspiring these blog posts are. I am currently struggling with, and have recently admitted to it, an eating disorder similar to what you went through. Sometimes I get these reality flashes where I realize how OCD and anxious I get around food and weight, and it positively scares me. I hardly go out anymore because restaurants don’t have calorie counts, drinks make you fat, and finger food at parties is downright dangerous, etc. I feel like a prisoner. I used to restrict to a max. of 600 calories a day, but now I’ve upped that to at least 1300. It’s not so much that I want to lose more weight, I’m just deathly afraid of gaining any. Lately I find myself to be losing more and more weight, but I can’t bring myself to allow myself to eat more calories in case I gain anything. It’s a vicious cycle, and I’m embarrassed about it.
I’ve started seeing a therapist, and I’ve made an appointment with a Nutritionist as well. Your success story gives me so much hope, even though my now obsessive mind is so very afraid of the journey ahead of me.
I initially only wanted to say a few words but I guess my comment turned into more of a rant. In a nutshell, I just want to thank you for sharing. Your accomplishments are somethings to be very proud of, and I admire you greatly for them.
All the best,


Órla January 13, 2014 at 12:30 pm

Wonderful wonderful post and one that so many people can relate to.

Like a lot of those who have commented above I am still trying to overcome binge-eating, all the while eating what I feel is a healthy balanced diet. Your point about “mental deprivation” really hit home with me. It makes so much sense that if you have a little bit of what you fancy every single day you won’t feel deprived.

Love the blog Angela, keep doing what you’re doing !! :D


kirsty January 14, 2015 at 4:43 pm


I’ve been looking at your website and have enjoyed reading your articles.

I was hoping you might be able to give me some advice as your site seems to be all about being HEALTHY and not skinny which is so important to me!

Essentially, I have battled with extreme orthorexia/anorexia for about 5 years, and at nearly 5ft 9 my weight dropped to 8st3. I looked dreadful.

After my husband left both me and my gorgeous son in march, this quickly changed into binge eating. I had previously always eaten only clean foods but began eating as much cadburys as I could find.

Resultantly, I am now a healthy 9st 8 with hips and cubes again yay!, but am not as toned, despite exercising 6 times a week,as I would like to be as didn’t gain the weight in exactly the best way, and have the dreaded muffin top.

I have been seeing a therapist, and really want to make the absolute best of my and my sons life.

I have set little goals like eating a piece of cake when my son has his birthday, eating out with friends without worry and going on a very long overdue holiday without hiding under a sarong.

The ultimate goal, accepting and loving who I am, exactly as I am.

I wonder if you have any help or advice for me in keeping to follow a healthy lifestyle?

Love and light


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